They say when you are missing someone that they are probably feeling the same, but I don't think it's possible for you to miss me as much as I'm missing you right now
I sat in my bedroom by my window listening to Thunder/
Boys Like Girls with one earphone while my mum picked
some dirty laundry off the couch.
"You know Summer, it won't hurt to clean your room once in a while" she said babbling something about personal space but my mind was stuck somewhere else, it wasn't about Landon and it wasn't about Cash. I was thinking about Raymond…. And it felt awful.
It was that feeling I knew so well, the feeling I never stopped having 4 months ago. The feeling I've secretly hidden carefully.
This can't happen again, no more Raymond, I promised Ronnie "Summer, your cell phone's ringing" said mum handing me my iphone than walking out of my room.
I looked at the ID and it was a strange number.
I don't usually answer strange numbers but what if this was important? "Hello?" I said answering the phone.
There was a silence…. "Hey Summer…It's Cash" he said as I tensed up why was he calling me?
"Umm….hey" I said not sure what else to say "What's up?"
"Not much, I said I'd call you, so now I'm calling you" he said.
"A week later which is… unfamiliar" I said.
"Yeah, I know" he said chuckling "So listen, do you have plans for tonight?".
Say yes, Summer don't you dare and….."No, why?" I said shit.
"I was thinking you might wanna go out somewhere" he said "but for the record, no pot included".
"That's a relief" I said sarcastically "But I don't think I can".
"Why? You said you don't have plans tonight" he said confused Yeah, I did say that didn't I?
"Hold on for a second" I said moving the iphone away from my ear to think for a while. Why not? Why shouldn't I go out with Cash? He's cute, he's funny and he's not Raymond. I took a deep breath than put the iphone back on my ear "So what do you have in mind?".
I walked with Cash into a fancy restraint not exactly the place
I'd expect a drug dealer would take me.
"Mr. Cash, table for two?" said a dude in a fancy suit Wow, even the people who work here are rich I looked at my clothes and I was wearing a white top and black skinny jeans with a rotten black converse nice to know that I'm dressed to the place.
I walked with Cash to a nice table by the window, I was about to sit down when he pulled the chair for me wow, that's really sweet….freaky but sweet.
"So" he said sitting down "You like the place?".
"It's really fancy" I said as he smiled.
"What? You thought I'd take you to a street fight or a street race?" he said laughing, I didn't want to say that I did so I just smiled.
"I didn't know you were rich" I told Cash as he walked me home "I
mean, how could you afford that place? I can't even afford peeing
"It never came up" he said shrugging.
"But if you have all this money…" I said "..why were you-"
"Hanging out with those losers?" he interrupted "Honestly I don't know, I'm just passing the time by you know?".
"Can't you pass the time by away from druggies?" I said confused.
"I don't have friends besides them" he said "Not friends that I like anyway, everyone wants me as Darwin not Cash"
"Your name isn't Cash?" I said confused.
"Yeah I thought you figured that out" he said "I mean no rich family is going to call their son Cash".
"Right Darwin is more appropriate" I mocked as he stopped walking and looked at me in disbelief.
"Are you mocking me?" he said as I tried to not laugh.
"I'm sorry but Darwin is… It just makes fun of itself" I laughed.
"You know even with million dollars, I had problems growing up with that name" he said as I laughed.
"No shit Sherlock" I said sarcastically as he stopped laughing and gave me a serious look. Than he did something, something I've never tried before, something that I couldn't decide was bad or good, Cash or Darwin or whatever….kissed me.
"On your first date?" said Ronnie confused while I told her about
last night. We were both sitting in her living room.
"Yeah, my first kiss" I said "I kissed Cash and he's my first kiss".
"You mean your first kiss is Darwin" said Ronnie as I gave her a confused look.
"They're both the same person" I said in a duh tone.
"Yeah but when you use his real name it sounds like your first kiss was with a nerd" she said trying to make me laugh as I chuckled.
"You're a loser" said Raymond walking in the living room "You just had your first kiss when you're 15? Seriously I had mine when I was 9 or something".
"We're not all perverts like you" said Ronnie.
I tried to make fun of Raymond but I couldn't….Cause I knew I didn't think of him like that, I knew I loved Raymond.