Chapter 3- I’m too sexy in this club
I never even realised that I’d fallen asleep until the gay boy, also known as my brother, started to sing. Oh the joy.
"Cause I'm too sexy in this club
Too sexy in this club
So sexy it hurts
If you feel sexy in this club
Then go 'head toast it up
Take it down, let's get sexy right now" a deep voice belted out as the sound of the rhythmic water pounded against the floor. It was Taylor singing in the shower. Again. I let out a disdainful noise at the back of my throat that was loud and warned Taylor that he'd woken the dragon up.
Getting out of the bed, I stumbled onto the landing and banged on the bathroom door.“If you don’t shut up; I’m flushing the toilet and the shower will be so cold that you’ll talk extremely high-pitched when you meet your friends the day after tomorrow. Don’t make me embarrass you in front of your girlfriends” I shouted groggily.“I thought I was a fool for no one
But ooh, baby I'm a fool for you
You're the queen of the superficial
And how long before you tell the truth?
Ooh, you set my soul alight
Ooh, you set my soul alight” He began to sing another song just to spite me.
“Fair enough, I’ll just put that video up on YouTube then”. I smirked at the thought. Christmas eve, Taylor decided to get hammered. After a few hours, he also decided to take a shower and belt out bring me to life- terribly off key. I recorded it for such times when he would, as predicted, annoy and embarrass me.This was one of those times.“Okay, I’m going downstairs, the toilet will be flushed” I warned, before running down the stairs and into the hallway. I was grinning from the excitement until I smacked into a wall. Well, when I say wall, I mean Taylor’s fat pack.“Oooh” I groaned as the floor suddenly got closer to me and the breath was knocked out of my lungs. I rolled onto my stomach and Taylor offered a hand to me, but I knocked it away.
“What the hell? Are you wearing lead armour or something?” I groaned, clutching my stomach from the pain.
“You okay sis?” He asked, holding back a chuckle.
“What do you think captain obvious?” I retorted making my way into the kitchen.
“I was only asking, sergeant sarcastic” He wined like the two year old he claimed to be.
“Uh huh”, I stated, “Whatever helps you sleep at night” I croaked while getting an ice pack from the freezer, Taylor just lent against the sideboard and folded his arms across his chest. I lifted my t-shirt up slightly, exposing my stomach, and winced at the sight. There was a purplish bruise forming across it.“See this?” I snapped my fingers in front of Taylor’s face to get his undivided attention. “You did this. Now apologize to the stomach” I ordered.
“Sorry stomach” He looked completely serious apart from the smirk that was enveloping his face. “Want me to kiss it better?” He offered.
“Ew God no” I shivered in revulsion while fastening the ice pack on my stomach and letting my t-shirt drop back down. Taylor regarded me with an eyebrow raised. “Ask me that about ten years ago and I would have said yes, but I’m not a baby anymore” I snapped the last part a little too harshly. “Sorry” I immediately apologised.
“Nah, you’ve gone through a hell of a lot and I shouldn’t provoke you” He apologised sincerely.
“Sure” I shrugged, looking at the floor; I hated letting people see my emotions. Emotions get you killed. Love gets you killed. It’s all just a matter of time. The only time I would let my guard down was when I was in my room and there was nobody to hurt.
“It’s getting worse isn’t it?” He asked tenderly like he was talking to a baby dear.
“I suppose so” I shrugged, “I keep thinking I’m over it but then the nightmares come back and I feel even worse than before.” A tear escaped my eye and I then knew that it was time to go into my room.
“No you don’t” Taylor replied, barring the way out of the kitchen, almost as if he knew what I was thinking.
“Let me go” I fought half-heartedly, already knowing that my attempts were feeble.
“Come on little one. Ristance is futile” He said in a poor attempt of a borg voice.
“Little one? Who the hell are you calling little?” I asked, narrowing my eyes at him in mock solemnity.
“You” He replied with a shrug.
“Don’t talk down to me, you’re just freakishly tall” I sniffed. It was true though; he was about six foot four in height.
“I can’t really talk up to you, can I? You’re freakishly small” He retorted flawlessly. Damn he was good, 1-0 to him.
“You’ve just declared war” I growled menacingly before fumbling behind me for the squirty cream.
“You looking for this?” He held up the cream just above my head.
“Nope” I replied, going for the ketchup instead.
“Just this” I flipped the lid open and squirted him with it. 1-1.
“Ooh, I’m going to set Billy on you.”
“Eh, I’ll take my chances; he’s as queer as a picnic basket. He wouldn’t attack a girlfriend. You on the other hand...” I trailed off suggestively.
“Eww no” He flipped his phone lid up and dialled Billy.
“I see you’ve got him on your speed dial. Gay lovers unite!” I bellowed at nobody in particular.
“Say that again; that old woman in Japan didn’t hear you” He growled.
“Gay mufflersffffitf” Taylor had covered up my mouth with his hand.
“Billy! Yeah, this is a call to war, gather the troops” He ordered and I licked his hand, which immediately made him let go. Although he just wiped his hand on my shirt. Ah, but it was worth it to see his disgusted face.
“What?!” Taylor exclaimed.
“Oh never mind.” He snapped the phone shut.
“Awe was little Tay Tay rejected. Man up; feel the burn” I jeered. 1-2.
“I’ll bloody burn you if you don’t shut up!” He mumbled under his breath. I just shook my head and aimed the bottle at him.
“What did you just say?” I exclaimed, in full knowledge of what he just said.
“Nothing” He grinned, “Apart from the fact that you smell” He grinned like a three year old.
“Like roses, thank you very much” I retorted flawlessly. 1-3.
“oh now you’re in for it” He growled.
“Bring it!” I replied enthusiastically.
Twenty minutes later, we’d managed to cover the entire kitchen with a mix of cream and ketchup. It looked utterly disgusting to say the least. And what was even worse was the sound of keys jingling in the lock. Jordan was back. I knew it was him because he always forgot which way to turn the keys in the lock. Lacey would be following no doubt as they worked together in, what I understand as, a band of some sorts. Jordan was the bass guitarist of the band and Lacey was the manager. I think. Eh, I don’t understand what they talk about anyway so I tune it out. Just as I was about to run into my room; the sound of anger washed through the house like a tidal wave.
“What the hell is this?” Came Jordan’s voice. Oh crap. We’re so screwed.
“I believe it is what mum would call expressive arts” Taylor said nonchalantly as he leaned against the side. He wasn’t afraid to back chat his parents, but, I, on the other hand, still felt as if I was just a guest here and that I couldn’t do things like that. In my old house, my best friend and I would start food fights in the dinner hall and when we got sent home, I’d have one with my parents too. Weird huh?
“Don’t back chat, young man”
“Oh leave them; remember that time when we made pancakes and....” Lacey interrupted enthusiastically, launching into a story with too many big words in.
“Hurry up” Taylor silently ushered my upstairs.
“Stop right there. Clean this mess up and go to bed.” Jordan smirked.
“This is all your fault” I hissed at my stupid brother.
“Nope, I’m not to blame”
“If you hadn’t have started singing in the shower then this wouldn’t have happened” I disagreed.
“And if you hadn’t threatened to flush the toilet either.” Taylor scowled.
Needless to say, the argument lasted till midnight, and then we cleaned up after until three AM. I just crawled into bed and let myself drift into the blissful abyss known as dreamland.