Monday morning was turning out to be yet again another day that started off badly. In my rush across the living room, I slipped on the rug and landed on the hardwood floor with a loud thud. The wind escaped from my lungs, and I laid there, gasping. Why was I such a klutz when I was in a hurry? I had woken up late, again. Last night around one I had snuck off again secretly hoping that Jonah would be driving around or maybe even walking. I hadn't seen him, though, but had stayed out there for a long time just hoping that he would show. Needless to say, I didn't wake up when my alarm clock rang. As I got up and raced up the stairs in search of my shoes, I quickly remembered Saturday afternoon when I had seen Jonah. He ended up leaving shortly after because of some call he recieved. Whoever had been talking to him at the other end seemed to be mad, and Jonah just kept saying, "Yes sir, yes sir." After that he said that he had to go and simply walked away, leaving me standing on the side of the road.
"Shit!" Where were my shoes? I needed my shoes now. If I didn't hurry I was going to miss the bus again, and I did not want to walk. Sticking my head into my mom's room just incase my shoes were in there, I noticed a something sitting on her dresser. Walking over to it, I tried to get a better look at what it was. The first thing I saw was my mom and dad's faces staring back at me. They were young, maybe late twenties to early thirties. They were smiling and had their arms wrapped around each other. My mom was wearing a ring. They must've been engaged by that point, obviously. They had been so happy together. So, so very happy. I turned the picture over when I noticed that tears were now streaming down my cheeks. Turning around silently, I walked out of her room and back downstairs. Luckily, I spotted my shoes peaking out from behind the couch. I was in too much of a sad mood to care anymore. Slipping them on my feet, I picked up my back pack and slung it over my shoulder. I no longer cared about being late. I didn't really care about much of anything at the moment. My mind wasn't with me, instead, it was upstairs, still with the picture.
I walked outside and started walking down the street. I knew that by now the bus was gone; I was going to have to walk. Walking along, I noticed absolutely nothing. I was again on autopilot, just going through the motions. Sometimes it was really bad. I got so stuck in the past that I wouldn't even notice someone standing right in front of me. I felt so tired. When was I going to catch a break? All I wanted was to slip into a deep sleep and just completely forget about everything. I almost fell down on the spot. I felt tired enough to do that.
Because of the current state of mind I was in, you can understand why I didn't register the yelling that I was hearing. I mean, I heard it, but it seemed really far away. I didn't really even contemplate the slight possibility that the yelling might be directed towards me. Instead of turning my head to see where the yelling was coming from, I simply kept walking. I honestly didn't care who it was or who or what they were yelling at or about. It didn't matter. Nothing mattered.
I jumped when a hand came down on my shoulder. Whirling around, I found myself looking at Jonah.
"What are you doing?" I asked. Even to my ears my voice sounded off.
"I, uh, was wondering if you needed a ride," he said. That's when I noticed the car behind him with the driver's door thrown open. "I was calling your name, but I don't think you heard me."
"I uh, I'm kind of having a bad day."
He nodded and didn't ask any further questions.
"But yeah, I'd like a ride," I said. But already I was slipping back into autopilot, not really thinking about what was happening. I didn't really care about Jonah at the moment. I mean, what was there to care about? Why did anyone care about anything? I walked over and got into his car. As I settled in, I let my head fall against the window and slumped over. My whole body sagged. All the energy had left me and I didn't have the will to do anything. I cursed myself for being so weak. All of this because of a simple picture. I was completely falling apart just after seeing his face. Since his death I had not allowed myself to look at any pictures or anything that he had given me. I tried to forget about it, because it was easier that way.
I was suddenly aware that we hadn't moved an inch, and Jonah was staring at me. I picked my head up and stared back at him.
"Destiny?" he said, "What's wrong?"
"Nothing," I said, an obvious lie.
He frowned. He then turned back and faced the road. A second later we were moving. I let my head roll back to its original position and stared out the window.
About ten minutes later I became aware of the fact that we weren't going in the direction of school.
"Where are we going?" I asked.
"Have you eaten breakfast?" he asked, completely ignoring my question.
"Okay, good," he said, nodding.
"Where are we going?" I repeated.
He glanced over at me quickly and said, "You'll find out soon enough."
I probably should've been concerned or thought about the fact that I was about to skip school, but I did none of these things. For some weird and unsualy reason, I trusted Jonah. Either that or I was so past caring about anything that it didn't really matter to me anymore. But some time in between him offering me a ride and now, I had slowly begun to become more alert. I didn't feel quite so groggy. I felt more alive. Don't get me wrong, I was no where near in a good mood, but it was getting better. I glanced over at him. He was too quite. He was too secluded. He wasn't approchable. He was sometimes too blunt. He closed himself off too often. He was guarded. He had walls. He sometimes made is seem as if you meant absolutely nothing to him. He was mysterious. He was too secretive. I hardly knew anything about this boy.
And yet in the short time that I had known him, he had made me feel more me than I had felt in a very long time. I let my head rest against the chair and a small sigh escaped me. We weren't friends; we weren't strangers. We didn't really have a name. But whatever we were, it was better than anything I'd ever been in before. We. Hm. I liked that. Jonah and I. Me and Jonah. We. I liked the togetherness of that term. And I liked it even more when it was referring to me and the boy sitting next to me.
When we stopped at a red light, Jonah seemed to sense me looking at me, and glanced over. I didn't look away, didn't feel like I really needed to. Something about him made staring feel not awkward. So, I kept looking at him. I loved his eyes. They were so different. His hair. His nose. His mouth. His face all together. Everything about him was unlike anything I'd ever known. Even though we weren't friends yet, I hoped that we'd be friends soon.