Skinny Love.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN-ILL BREAK UP WITH HER TOMORROW

“Why did you go out with him?” His voice sounded from the lounge as I shut the door behind me. Great we’re back to where we’ve started.

I rolled my eyes, “I can’t go out now?” I walked into the lounge and sat as far away from him as possible. I refuse to be a little girl on the sidelines. Some little toy he could play with when his girlfriend wasn’t around.

A pained look came across his face and he scooted closer to me. My back was against the armrest so I had no way of escape. Taking my hands in his, he gave them a gentle squeeze.

“Just tell me why” He looked so confused. So lost. He must have taken really good acting lessons.

“Why didn’t you tell me about Amanda?” I spat. If he could ask me such a question, then I should be able to as well. He looked shocked and surprised. He looked as if he didn’t know what to say. Ha! Score for Kylie.

“I-I……..” He looked down as he trailed off. I wish he wouldn’t make me feel so guilty. It was his fault. He should’ve told me he had a girlfriend. He shouldn’t have led me on.

“You what?” If he can’t even explain himself, we’re never going to get anywhere.

“I like you not her….. It’s just; she was my girlfriend even before you came.”

Right, He was making this more and more cliché. Girl likes boy, boy has girlfriend but boy likes girl, not girlfriend. Gah, how confusing!

“That’s not my point. If you knew she was your girlfriend, you shouldn’t have led me on”

“But I-“

“Forget it” I cut him off. He shouldn’t even have kissed me, in the first place. I mean if he can cheat on his girlfriend, who’s to say he can’t cheat on me? That would be like Inception, cheating on his girlfriend with me then cheating on me and his girlfriend with someone else. Cheating within Cheating.I stand up; ready to leave when he suddenly starts speaking again.

“I don’t want to hurt you. But you need to know that Zac isn’t good for you” He stands up and pleads with his eyes. I'm not going to let those blue eyes of his win me over. Not again.

“So you can date Amanda, but I can’t date Zac?” Well that was mighty selfish of him. He can’t have it both ways. It’s either me or Amanda. It’s either him or Zac. My stomach plummeted as my heart screamed for Killen.

“Amanda is a different story” What was that supposed to mean? Was he trying to say Amanda was better than me? That with me, it was much more difficult. While with her, it was a whole different story?

Gosh, I'm such a paranoid freak.

“Zac’s not taken. I'm not a slut” I stomped off to my room and opened up my laptop. Checking my e-mails, I noted that my mom had sent three. I replied as nicely as I could, trying to forget about Killen and his stupid ways.

It’s so frustrating. Blatantly Infuriating! I want so bad to be with Killen, but it’s obviously not meant to be. The signs are showing.

Deciding to do a little research, I searched Zac’s name on Facebook. The first one that popped out was Zachary T. Meadows.

His profile picture, was a shot of him holding a beer mug and smiling lazily up at the camera, a blond girl hanging on his arm smiled up drunkenly as well.

Well, now. I don’t know what to think anymore. Killen’s taken, Zac’s taken. I'm just the little slut that runs around stealing girl’s boyfriend’s unconsciously. This town isn’t doing so well for me. Maybe my quality time with dad is done.

I spend at least ten minutes of my day talking to him. Honestly, there's not much to talk about. All he ever does is run around doing things Dylan asks him to. It’s a pathetic puppy dog act. She tells him to do something and he follows obediently, so he can receive a sick little treat from her.

I don’t even want to imagine what she does for him.

A knock sounded from the door and I made no move to acknowledge it. There’s no one else here in this house with me other than Killen. Killen started pounding and my head started throbbing. Why can’t he leave me alone to think?

If he was in my position, would he like to be disturbed? I'm going through so much right now that my brain is going on overdrive.

“Kylie” He groaned “Just let me talk to you”

“What's there to talk about?”

“Us” Us, it’s not meant to be. Were practically siblings and all these feelings are rushing, it’s going a bit too fast don’t you think?

“There's no ‘us’” I rolled my eyes. Even though my heart was saying differently, my smart ass mouth wasn’t.

“Please, you don’t even know about me and Amanda” His voice pleads from the other side of the wall.

“I know you show PDA with her. That must mean a lot” I mean, couples who show PDA are those who are madly in love and can’t keep their hands off of each other. Either that or they're just inconsiderate to those who are around.

Neither sounds any good.

“She kissed me. It wouldn’t look right if I pushed a girl off of me in public”

“And it definitely didn’t look right, for you to shove your tongue down her throat in public”

It was silent. Yes! Maybe he gave up. It stung a little that he didn’t care for me enough to try harder. But isn’t that what I wanted all along? For him to go away and leave me alone.

NO.

Suddenly the door burst open and Killen stood there, holding a set of keys. My mouth hung open and my heart leaped for joy.

“Get out!” My heart and my mind are polar opposites. My mind is being smart at the moment.

“Not until we talk.”

“Talk about what? Us? You barely know me! Just think of me as your long lost sister!”

His face fell “I can’t do that” He shook his head as he contemplated thinking of me as a sister. “Let me get to know you”

I shook my head. “Until you aren’t taken. I'm a sister to you” It hurt me to say it. But it needed to be said.

I hate having to ignore him and shove him away. I need to. If anything gets out of hand, I don’t know what I’d do. Besides, he has a girlfriend. I don’t want to spend my senior year as the girl who stole the boyfriends.

He looked at me sadly “I don’t want you as my sister”

“Please just go”

He shook his head “I’ll break up with her tomorrow”

Now I feel even worse! A poor girl’s heart is going to get broken because of me. But if I really wanted to be with him, it had to be done. How can I be so selfish? Making him break up with the girl, who technically had him first? I hate being this way, it’s an unfair attitude.

“Then talk to me tomorrow” I gave him a push and he stumbled out of my room. Slamming the door in his face, I grabbed my iPod and jumped into bed, letting the music carry me away.