I have this
In it, i see her standing in front of me, on the other side of a big wide road.
And i can see her.
She is smiling and looking at me in the eyes.
Her look is mesmerising, i cant look away.
It brings back memories of long walks in the city and of passionate kisses.
I stand there and i look at her.
She is beautiful.
But i stand there.
The distance between us,
although small, seems so big, it scares me.
Something whispers in my ear:
''Go to her. Go. ''
But i stand there, i do nothing.
All i have is the image of her round little head, her eyes penetrating mine
and the smile on her face tells me, she has been waiting for me.
But i stand there. That's all i do.
I want to cross that road.
I want to go to her,
grab her around her waist and lift her up as she laughs out of hapiness.
I want to kiss those lips like the last time,
when time itself stood still and nothing really mattered.
And i just stand there.
Looking at her.
Her, looking at me.
Afraid that i can't cross that road
Afraid that the smile on her face is just an illusion that my own excitement has created.
I do that you know,
I romanticise things.
The truth is, i would
rather get stepped on by a moving car, trying to get to her, than
to turn back and walk away.
I would rather have her push me back and cut off my wings, than to have her turn away from me.
That's the truth
And it hurts.
But all i do, is stand
I'm waiting for her to come to me,
although something tells me that she won't.
That's it. That's my fantasy.
However, it feels very,
And what do I do?
I'm trying to turn her into litterature.
I'm trying to find something to hold on to.
I'm trying to find the courage and the certainty to turn away.
But i stand there. On the side of that road.
Trying to decide whether
it's better fall as a true man,
or it's better to keep walking with doubts in my mind.