the Best Ones Fall Sometimes"
Collide by Howie
Me, myself and I.
Elizabeth Miller. Or Eli for short.
During my first
year of college, I was only focused on my school-work, and
knowing what my next paper was going to be about. Falling in love
was the last thing on my to-do list. Hell, it wasn't even on the
list to begin with! But somehow, that's exactly what happened
I wouldn't say it
changed who I am, because that's not entirely true. It changed
some of the things I thought I knew, what I had thought I had
wanted out of my life, and who I wanted to become.
That was until I
had met Seth Henderson.
In all honesty, I
had found Seth to be pretty obnoxious and full of himself from
the first time I had laid eyes on him. You know, when you first
meet a person, and they just give out that type of vibe. You just
know what they are, and who they are.
I didn't even make
an effort to try and get to know him. To me, he wasn't worth my
time. Not even a little. I knew his type. He's the guy that
parties it up, he's the guy that has a different girl in his arms
every week. He's the one who could really care less about his
future and is just focused on the fun part of college. He wasn't
someone I wanted to be associated with. He was someone I didn't
want to waste my time on.
Then that all
suddenly changed. Yes he was someone I could really care less
about. It was true that he had annoyed me to no end, and that I
couldn't stand being with him for more than five minutes. But now
that's all in the past. Now I hate being away from him for even
more than a second, now he's someone I really do love and care
about. Sure he still annoys me, that's unavoidable, but I still
love him none the less.
In school, I was
the straight A student. I had one of the highest GPA's in my high
school class. I worked hard for everything I did and reached not
for the stars or the moon, but a completely different galaxy all
together. I don't think I had ever once received a C grade on
anything in my life. I had gotten a B only a few times, but not
often at all.
I guess you could
consider me to be a 'nerd,' but that's simply because I put forth
the effort to succeed. Although I was studying constantly, I
hated it. It was something I hated with a passion. Hatred aside,
I knew I couldn't dwell on all the homework and tests because it
would only make it that much harder, and nobody needs to deal
with that stress.
I'm not trying to
gloat about it, but I'm a pretty good student. Actually, I'm
better than good, I'm pretty damn fantastic. But there were
always the draw backs from this. I wasn't the popular girl, or
the girl who knew everyone, or even the girl with all the
friends. I was the girl with the highest IQ, and I guess you
could say I was thought to be a know it all.
The boys at school
never paid any attention to me. It wasn't because I was ugly,
that's not true. I wasn't completely unfortunate.I had long brown
hair with pale green eyes and a few freckles covering my face,
like sprinkles on a cupcake. I wore glasses too. I hadn't always
worn glasses, I used to wear contacts for the longest time, and
then they started to irritate, and dry out my eyes, so no more
contacts for me.
I was shy. At least
that's what I seemed at first. But once you got to know me, you
would wish that I would stop opening my mouth for once. I was
loud and rambunctious with my best friends. Even if I only had a
few. They would describe me as being far from quiet.
No the boys at
school never paid any attention to me because I wasn't easy. I
wasn't the girl who would jump at the chance to get into
someone's pants. Or even kiss some guy. I wanted it to actually
I've never liked
the idea of sex before marriage. Call me old school, but it's
true. I guess that's why guys stayed the hell away from me,
because most of them all wanted one thing, and one thing only. A
good shag with no strings attached.
I didn't mind this.
It just saddens me to know that there wasn't a single guy that
was worth it.
So then I had sworn
to myself that I wouldn't get involved with men in college.
Unless someone really fantastic came along. Which is exactly what
happened soon after meeting Seth.
"Oh honey! I'm
going to miss you so darn much!" my mom exclaimed with tears
cascading down her face, getting ready to leave me in my dorm and
have a long four hour drive home.
"I know mom. Me
too," I said, wrapping my arms around her tightly.
"You're going to be
great Eli. I know it," she whispered to me, rubbing my back
believing in me," I reply, with teary eyes.
"You're the best
Eli. You're the best daughter I could have asked for," she says
with tears in her eyes.
"I love you mom," I
say, hugging her even tighter than before.
"I love you too El.
I better leave. Don't want to get stuck in rush hour traffic,"
"Yeah, ok," I reply
waking her to the door.
"It was nice
meeting you Maddy!" she says to my new roommate.
"Yeah, you too
Miss. Drew," Maddy says, standing beside me.
"Love you El," she
says kissing my head goodbye.
everyday right? Morning and night? Even if it's for only a minute
or two," she asks, sounding hopeful.
"Ok good. Bye Eli!"
she says with a wave, leaving me.
I can tell she's
trying to not cry. Just by the way she said 'bye' tells me she's
going to let the water works start as soon as she gets in the
car. You know how your voice changes when you're trying not to.
That's what she sounded like.
"So, what do you
want to be?" Maddy asks, interrupting my thoughts.
"A pediatrician," I
"Oh wow! That's
awesome!" she exclaims.
"Thanks, what about
you?" I asked
"No clue. My
freshman year in high school, I thought I wanted to be a lawyer.
Sophomore year, a high school teacher, junior year, a
radiologist, and senior year an engineer. All of which I ended up
not being interested in. So I really don't know. I'll probably
end up changing my major a bunch of times," she replied with a
shrug of her shoulders.
"Wow, you're all
over the place." I say.
"I know, I really
don't know what I want to do. So what classes are you taking?"
"Well, I'm taking
Biology, chemistry, biochemistry, statistics, and psychology.
You?" I reply.
but I'm just taking the regular classes. Math, English and
like you're interested in that do something that involves that!
That's where you need to start at if you don't know what you
"I'll look into it
next semester. Thanks Eli."
"Have you eaten
anything yet?" she asked.
"Nope. You?" I said
"Want to go get a
bite to eat?" I asked.
"I thought you
would never ask!" Maddy exclaimed.
"I've only met you
a few hours ago, but I can tell we're going to be great
Maddy simply smiles
at me and says, "Me too Eli, me too,"
That night we both
toss and turn in bed for what seems like ages. But it's not
because we can't sleep. Believe me, I am so tired right now, I
could die. It's because some idiot is blasting the loudest music
possible in the dorm next door at fucking one in the fucking
"Oh my goodness!
This is ridiculous!" I exclaim, throwing the blankets off of me,
sliding my feet into my duck slippers.
I know, a college
student with duck slippers, I'm classy right?
"Where the hell are
you going?" Maddy grumbled.
"To give whoever's
next door a piece of my mind." I answered.
I didn't care that
I was outside for the whole world to see me in my yellow tank top
that didn't cover my entire tummy. I didn't care that I was
wearing short white soffe shorts. I didn't even care that I was
wearing my duck slippers. All that I cared about at the moment
was being able to actually sleep.
I knocked on the
door loudly three times. Actually, it was more like banged on the
door. I waited and waited until the door finally opened.
I looked at who
stood in front of me up and down. I have to say, he was
I realized that I
hadn't said a word to him, and must have looked like an idiot
just standing there.
I noticed, like
myself, he was checking me out. I felt like he was undressing me
with his eyes, and suddenly felt extremely uncomfortable in my
shorts and tank top. I wished that I was wearing an over sized t
shirt and sweats.
"Hey, eyes up
here." I said pointing to my face.
He seemed slightly
taken aback, he even blushed but said, "What do you want
"How about you turn
down your music!"
"Why the hell
"Because it's one
in the fucking morning!" I shrieked.
"I'm tired! I've
got classes in a few hours, and I need my fucking sleep!"
"Well ignore it
then! Stop being a bitch about it, or you could go call mommy and
daddy and tell them to come get you. I'm sure you're some spoiled
ass princess who gets whatever the hell you want!"
I had never been
called a bitch before. Never.
"Fuck you!" I
The tears came. I
couldn't hold them back. The way he yelled at me, and then he
calls me that.
Apparently this guy
did have a heart because he started saying sorry over and over
"Oh shit. I didn't
mean to make you cry. You're not a bitch. I'll turn my music down
asshole!" I said, choking back my tears, completely ignoring his
With that I slide
down the wall opposite the door in front of me and pulled my legs
up to my chest and cried. The tears continued to fall down my
face. I wasn't crying just because of him calling me that, it was
because I missed home, I missed my friends, my family. I was
homesick. So homesick, and there wasn't a thing I could do about
I could feel Seth
next to me, just sitting beside me. He placed a hand around my
waist, pulling me closer to him. I rested my head on his chest.
He was silently comforting me, trying to make me feel
"I really didn't
mean what I said. You're not a bitch, I promise," he said.
I couldn't help but
smile at that, "It's not just that. It's more than that. I miss
home. I miss my mom and dad and little sister. I miss my friends.
I'm homesick," I respond.
"You get used to
it. You can always call home when you need to. Plus when you
don't have classes you can go and visit. You're a freshman aren't
"I suppose so.
Yeah, I'm a freshman. What are you?"
"Are you cold?" he
I hadn't even
realized I had goose bumps covering my arms and legs.
I simply nodded my
head in response.
He took off his
black hoodie and handed it to me. I gladly put it on.
"You're welcome. Do
you want to come in to my room? I've got hot chocolate and ice
I'm a little
hesitant at first, after all, I've only just met Seth not more
than ten minutes ago.
He seems to sense
my hesitation, "Don't worry, I'm not going to do anything. I
promise," he says.
"Ok, but just so
you know, I've got a black belt, so I can kick your ass if you
try to do anything," I warn.
He lets out a laugh
and replies, "Oh darn, guess my plan won't work. Oh well," he
says with a smirk.
"Oh ha, ha, ha.
You're so funny,"
"I like to think I
am," he replies.
"Exactly, you think
you are," I say teasingly.
"Feisty, I like
it," he says with a smirk.
"I'm sure you
"So where's this
comfort food you speak of?" I ask.
"Ice creams in the
fridge, and I can make the hot chocolate. It's instant though.
"Sure that's fine,"
I say over my shoulder.
"Oh Ben and Jerry
is my favorite!" I exclaim excitedly.
excited over ice cream. You are strange,"
"Hey don't judge
me! Ben and Jerry is always there for me in my time of need!" I
explain my reasoning.
"Whatever you say
"You're such a
"No, I believe you
said asshole if I remember correctly,"
"Fine! You're an
"Just eat your ice
After that night
Seth and I were constantly hanging out together. We were always
together. I guess you could say we were a packaged deal.
As much as we got
on each other's nerves, we just clicked. We worked together. To
other people, you would think we had grown up together, that we
had known each other for years since we were toddlers in
We had statistics
and psychology together. That meant that we were always studying
together, and doing projects together for class.
Somehow, we became
friends. We knew everything about each other. We knew each
other's fears, dreams, and secrets.
Somehow he became
my best friend. And I became his. We didn't just hang out
together because we had to, we wanted to.
During that first
year of college, I fell for him. I didn't just love him as my
best friend, I loved him as something more. Something much more.
But my fears got the best of me. I was afraid that he didn't feel
the same way. Afraid that he didn't love me, like I loved him. I
was just afraid of everything.
Then I started
playing the what if game. What if things didn't work? What if I
told him how I felt, and he didn't feel the same. Those what ifs
popped into my head constantly.
That's when I felt
like the girl in high school again. The one that seemed to have
everything figured out, and then suddenly you were sent off
course. That you really didn't have a clue of what you actually
wanted. Like a train that was derailed from it's
This whole year, I
knew what I wanted. Finish college, and become a pediatrician.
That was what I knew I wanted. But now I really wasn't all that
certain what exactly I wanted. Seth was just thrown into the mix
of it all.
Then over summer
break we decided to go on a trip to Paris. I'm not really sure
why we decided on Paris, but that was our destination. We would
go there for two weeks.
Those two weeks
changed everything for me.
It was the third
day we were in Paris, and we had decided to go to the Eiffel
Tower. I had always wanted to go. So we went.
It was at night and
we were the only people at the top. I have to say, Paris is
beautiful when it's night time with all the lights in the city.
I remember the
exact conversation we had that night. It was so vivid. Like I was
"It's beautiful up
here," I whispered.
"But do you know
what's even more gorgeous and beautiful then this?"
There was a pause
before he said, "You."
I don't think I
said anything to that. I didn't know what to say! What can you
say to that? So I just stood there like an idiot probably with my
mouth hanging wide opened.
"I like you Eli. I
really, really like you. I don't just like you, I love you! I've
loved you for such a long time. Ever since you banged on my door
that night. I just fell in love with you. Then when you started
crying, I felt awful because I had said something to make you so
sad. I just hated that you were crying, and I felt helpless. I
just wanted to make you feel better. I just wanted to make you
laugh and smile! And when we had those two classes together, I
just wanted to spend so much time with you. El, you're beautiful,
and gorgeous and stunning. You're funny and smart. I feel like I
can be myself around you, and you don't care. I love everything
I just stood there
silently. I was too shocked for words. Seth loved me? He's loved
me since he first saw me? Seth Mark Henderson loves me!
something," he said.
I didn't know what
When my lips met
his, I felt like there were fireworks going off once I closed my
Seth hesitates at
first, but then he's kissing me back. He cupped my cheek with his
left hand and then had his hand on my back with his right,
pulling me closer to him. I run my hands through his gorgeous
brown hair. Our mouths molded together perfectly. His mouth over
mine, kissing me like this. We stood there kissing for what
seemed like hours, but was really only a few minutes.
When we pulled away
from each other, but we were still wrapped in each others arms, I
whispered, "I love you too."
Seth smiled at me,
before leaning down to kiss me again.
"Eli Marie Miller,
will you be my girlfriend?" he asks, bending down on one knee as
if he's going to propose.
I laugh at this and
bring him back up to his feet. I then lean in to kiss Seth's
"So I take that as
a yes?" he asks hopefully.
"Absolutely," I say
with a smile.
"We should probably
get back to the hotel. It's getting late," he said hugging me
from behind, kissing my neck.
We decided to walk
the short distance to the hotel to get some exercise. We walked
hand in hand. It's almost funny how quickly and easily we moved
into our relationship status. I love it none the less.
"Does this feel
weird to you?" I ask.
"Not at all. I like
this," he says looking at me.
"What do you mean
by this?" I question curiously.
"Just getting to
hold your hand.Or hugging you close to me whenever and kissing
you. I like this," he says, kissing me on the cheek to prove his
I can't help but
"What about you? Do
you think this is weird?" he asks.
"Not really. It's
more surreal to me than anything."
"Surreal? In what
"You loving me. I
wouldn't have thought that the man I love, loves me in
"How could I not
love you? You're the best in every way."
I blush at
By now we're
standing in front of this gorgeous hotel that we're staying in
for a week and a half. Seth takes my hand in his and leads me to
the elevator and presses the button to our floor.
"Do you want to
stay in my room for tonight?" Seth asks me.
At first I'm
hesitant. Two college students in a hotel room together. A couple
no less. That could bring trouble. But I push those thoughts out
of my head. I trust Seth and I know he wouldn't do anything that
I didn't want him to do.
Seth holds my hand
and pulls out the key card form his back pocket. With a swift
movement he swipes the card and opens the door all in one
"After you my
I roll my eyes but
say, "Why thank you kind sir."
"You can borrow one
of my shirts," he says to me grabbing a shirt and throwing it to
I change in the
bathroom out of my shorts and tank top and put on the big shirt.
Seth's shirt reaches down to my knees
I walk out of the
bathroom and see Seth turning down the bed for us in nothing but
his boxers. I feel my cheeks burn and I know I'm blushing.
I think he senses
I'm staring and turns to look at me.
He smiles at me,
looking me up and down and says, "You look beautiful in my
This only makes me
blush even more than before.
"Is this ok?" he
I nod and walk to
the side of the bed and pull the covers over me.
Seth walks over to
the other side of the room to turn the lights off and then gets
in bed with me. I'm on my side facing away from him a little far
from him, but Seth's not having any of that. He wraps his arm
around my waist and pulls me closer to him. My head is resting on
his chest and his arms around my waist. I fall asleep listening
to Seth's heartbeat.
So maybe we won't
get married. Maybe we won't date for that long. Or maybe we do
stay together forever. Either way is fine with me, because
whatever happens, I know it will be ok.
So I guess my mom
was right. You have to allow yourself to fall sometimes. I've
realized that even the best ones, do indeed fall