What's going on with you? You were gone as if the earth opened and swallowed you. The phone numbers are not the same, on your house phone no one is picking up the calls... I am starting to think that you've fallen in a hole and you don't want to get out of there. So few of you i have, my friends (I count you as one of them - if i am wrong tell me) and all of you bring more worries instead of joy. I don't know if it is convenient to write to you right now, but yesterday before i went to sleep i thought of you ... i was wondering how your life continues, the studying, all the projects. Is your soul changing or you will heal it (is there a reason to be healed), if you have decided to give up after so many fights ... i will be still on the battlefield with a change in the success ... I mostly loose and my wounds are hardly healing, taking them more time to return their shape - they say it is because i got wiser, and i think it is because they stole me and my strength is almost gone, but i still do not give up. I was thinking about this that we write a letter to our closest people only once in half-year "because they will understand" how busy we are and how there is no time for us to be more Humans. It fades us away this life, makes us fake, make us trite and banal ... we fight , but too much is the grease, that flows us and the feelings remain locked deep inside, until one day in a moment of truth and silence we feel like we want to be sensitive. We open the chest of drawers of our undergone soul and we pick a feeling..... Usually Sadness. She, how to tell you, is a little girl with a pink dress, dingy in the lower right end with dirt, because she has been falling and getting up, playing hide and seek and hiding in those not so bright corners of our jaded mind. With this girl i am familiar for whole my life ... she is my mirror image and I've already accepted her ... and i know she will be with until the very last end of me. We play often..... But not those decorated, childish games, that always finish with a happy end, but with a real one ... everything in our games is real. I do not use big words, just sharing it ... good for me that i have this girl ... what if she was never there, never showed up - how would we know, that we are still human? !!! She has a sister, that is mad at me ... more rarely she comes already, saying: "I don't want to upset you - that's why!". She is called LOVE! And as much as I miss the sister, more and longer is the Sadness with me.... strange thing - they usually walk together hand in hand, but never show up together. I don't know, my friend, what to tell you! I will not comfort you now, there is no sense - you have to go through this alone ... the way i tried to outlast it . All i can do is pray for you ... and for that second sister, to meet each other, to talk for a while you two. And do you know, I told you once - life is too short for regrets! But you are gone, disappeared, hiding somewhere, and the girl with the pink dress does not want to tell me where ....and I will say Hello to her sister from you and from her sis, because lately I see her everywhere.... And thank God! I wish you to win the war, not the battles!