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Love is a complex emotion

Short story By: neji chan

Zofia has finally found a friend, but is this "friend" a bit obsessed. To the point of homocide? And the wierd thing is that she finds herself falling for him!

Submitted:Dec 24, 2008    Reads: 202    Comments: 16    Likes: 5   

Love.... Many people claim to feel it towards brothers, sisters, parents, and so on. But, how can we be certain that they are, indeed, telling the truth? Humans only say they love each other because it's politically correct; many people feel they have to. That is what I have and always will believe.

My pen moved across the milky white paper, leaving behind a variety of black lines. The unusually cool air blew a gentle gust of wind, causing the leaves to dance wildly and the birds to fly away. "There goes the scenery." I thought aloud. I dusted the dirt off my backside and began slowly walking to school. I was in no hurry, I didn't really enjoy school and so, I took my time. I took in my surroundings, the smell, the sight, the sound....It was remarkable. A few moments later, my feet met the end of a steep hill, which meant that the school building was on the other side. I slid down and landed on my feet, directly in a mud puddle. Unfortunately, I hadn't counted on anyone being there yet, so, imagine my surprise when I saw a pretty, rich-looking blonde girl covered in mud glaring at me! She began yelling things at me, although I am not quite certain what they were. I seem to have a knack for tuning things out, no offence, but, I like my eardrums. In order to avoid an unnecessary quarrel, I mumbled an apology and left to class. Due to this being a small town, the school was also small. It was made of two classrooms. One was for children from ages 5-11 and the other was for children from the ages 11-16. It was just your typical, small southern town. "Zofia, Zofia!!" I snapped out of my trance, only to see the scowling face of my teacher inches from my face.

Zofia, that's my name. It means wisdom, but I'm considered to be dumb because I don't always hear what the teacher asks and I seldom answer a question voluntarily. "Zofia, go do the math problem on the chalk board, and if you get it wrong the entire class gets extra homework!" She warned, I could have sworn I saw the vain on her forehead enlarge. I made my way to the front of the classroom, ignoring the mumbles of my peers. They were certain that I'd get the problem wrong and they'd have loads of homework. It was pretty rude to assume that I'd fail, but, I decided to let that pass. I picked up a small, piece of white chalk and got to work. I wondered why they thought I'd get it wrong, it was a very simple math problem, yet when I turned around, I saw that the faces of my classmates were now accompanied by wide eyes and open mouths. "How...That was a college level math problem....And your only thirteen!" The teacher stated, baffled at my success. I see now, I was supposed to fail. But, I don't think it was a college level question, it was way too easy!
Throughout the rest of the school day I ignored the oncoming stares of fellow students. Just imagine, the weird, obviously dumb girl solved a college level math problem correctly! While I was walking home from school I heard someone call my name. "Zofia, come here, I want to tell you something! It's really important!" To be honest, I really didn't care, but I was curious to see who had called my name, for I had no friends, so it seemed weird. So, I walked towards the voice, surprised when I saw that very same blonde girl from this morning along with, what I assumed was her "posse". "What is it?" I queried my expression emotionless. Her innocent smile then transformed into a glare, the kind of glare that said "I'm pissed and you'd better watch out." She smirked and said "You sullied my favourite dress, and you're going to pay!" "And your point is....?" I asked in a sarcastic tone. Then, she got furious, which I found hilarious, so much so that I actually smiled! "Now, if you don't mind, I have to leave." I stated as politely as I could as I pushed passed Blondie. I could feel her burning hot glare bore into my flesh. It was just a damn dress, why the hell was Blondie so pissed?! She bent down and grabbed a round, gray rock, which was about the size of a mouse, and threw it at me. I moved my arms in front of my face, creating my very own shield and closed my eyes. But, after awhile I noticed that nothing had hit me, so I glanced through the small crevice in between my arms, only to see a boy standing in front of me! It would have been pretty cool if he caught the rock, it would have, but he didn't. Instead, he allowed it to smash against his cheek, leaving behind an embarrassingly noticeable violet mark. "Are you alright?" He asked a look of pure concern on his face. "What's it to you?" I replied, getting a confused look from the boy in response.

"Sakura! My name is Sakura; it's nice to meet you." He said as he stretched his hand out, awaiting mine to reply. I didn't. If it was one thing I knew, it was that I could never have friends. I'll think alone, live alone, and die alone. "Isn't Sakura a girls' name?" I queried, hopefully this would get him off my back. He stood there, quietly for a moment, looking down at his feet, which must have been very interesting; then he looked up and smiled a big, goofy smile. "Yeah, my mom and dad wanted a girl, so, now that's my name." He confessed, still smiling. I felt my face increase in temperature. Holy shit was I blushing! In fear that he might see my natural rough, I quickly spun around. Too quickly, for when I did, I ended up falling flat on my face. Great, he won't notice it if my entire face is covered in dirt! I stood back up almost as fast as I'd fallen, but ended up wishing I hadn't when I saw Sakura looking through my sketch book. He seemed intrigued, sort of like when a teenage boy is first introduced to play boy magazines. I snatched the book out of his hands, earning another one of his confused looks. "I don't see why you're so embarrassed." He stated. "You are very good." "Well I don't see why you insist on looking through my stuff!" I replied. I was getting angry. Not because he looked at my drawings, or because he insisted on talking to me, but because I kept blushing!

You'd think that the conversation would end, but, no, it continued, even as I walked away. "So....how long have you lived here?" Sakura questioned as he tried to catch up with me. I turned abruptly and answered anger evident in my voice. "Forever…Why the hell do you keep talking to me?!" I'm not going to lie; I did feel pretty bad after I said that. I mumbled a quick "sorry", all the while attempting to hide my embarrassment. "It's alright, I was being pretty annoying." He confessed.

I giggled at his self-accusation, which, in return, made him laugh. It was weird-Being laughed with instead of being laughed at. He then began to twiddle his fingers in a nervous fashion until finally, I just exclaimed "Why are you acting so nervously?" in my oh-so gentle voice, which caused him to start rambling like a student throwing excuses at his teacher whom is about to chew him out for forgetting his homework. "Nothing, I was just wondering if you wanted to do something-That's all." He managed to spit out. Wait, was he asking me out? I was so deep in confusion, that I didn't even realize Sakura was still talking. "....I could cook dinner, maybe....Are you listening? H-e-l-l-o-o!" I quickly snapped back to reality, coming face to face with Sakura's hands being waved frantically in my face. "Huh? Oh, sorry. Yeah, sounds great...You cook?" I queried, for it was pretty rare to see a guy who was gifted in the culinary arts. "Well, yeah, so...Is it a date?" He asked, uttering that last word carefully. So he was asking me out. After about a half hour of an awkward conversation, we eventually left to his house. Once his home came into view I became impressed. His house wasn't huge or anything, but, it was so beautifully cozy. This picturesque domicile was only made more amazing with the lovely shrubs, multitude of flowers, and lush grass. All I could do was stand there.

Well, aren't you going to come in?" Sakura inquired, already holding the door open for me. So, without hesitation, I hurried into his house. Once I stepped inside my nose decided to take over-Leading me to a smell that made my mouth water. Jokingly, Sakura tapped my hand with a wooden spoon and scolded me for sticking my nose in the food-Sounding much like my mother. Oh, speaking of which... "Oh, sorry Sakura, I think I should probably get back home. My mom-"

"It's fine, she won't mind, trust me." He interrupted. So, finding it impossible to leave the smell of whatever resided in that pot, I decided to stay. Noticing the river of drool I'd created, he quickly warned me that it would take another twenty minutes until the dinner was done. "So, are you going to give me the grand tour of your abode?" I asked eager to see the rest of his house. "Oh, it's pretty messy-I can't. Maybe another time..." He pleaded whilst he walked down the hall. "I'll be back, I just forgot something outside." I nodded and awaited his return, but, I began to get bored. So, I decided to poke around a little while he was gone. I know curiosity killed the cat, but, I'm no cat. I felt my feet carefully make their way towards a closed door on the other side of the room. I clutched the smooth, cool knob, making sure Sakura was nowhere in sight as I carefully turned it-Making sure not to make too much noise. The door creaked open and my eyes widened to the size of ostrich eggs.

The smell of decaying bodies filled my nostrils, causing my very psyche to gag. I quickly closed my eyes-wishing the corpses would disappear from my thoughts. My mind raced frantically-part of me was trying to convince me that this was all just in my imagination and another part of me kept telling me to run. But, I didn't know which voice to obey.

It was like a car crash. No matter how hard I tried I couldn't look away. A certain carcass in the far courner of the room seemed especially intriguing. Why did I seem so drawn to it? Slowly, I walked toward it. My legs were jelly and my mind was blank-The only thing that had me walking was that I could've sworn I knew that person. But, that was impossible. I edged closer and closer till I was standing right in front of it. I knelt down in front of it, studying its features-Its familiarity intrigued me. Her golden hair and slender body, her dark eyelashes and full, pink lips, and her skin which seemed to have been kissed lightly by the sun-They all seemed so familiar. My heart stopped and I couldn't breathe. Oh god, please-Please don't let this be who I think it is! I lightly stroked her face as tears fell from my eyes and onto my knees. It was her, I knew it. Why-Why did this have to happen? I pulled her into a tight hug and whispered through gasps. "Mother-Oh mother, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry mother..." I could have sworn I heard her voice. It was saying "Run! Get out of here! Hurry love, go!" Hesitantly, I left her and quickly ran from the room, shut the door and…Ran right into Sakura.

"What's wrong Zofia? You seem like you're in a rush." Oh god, did he see me go into that room? I have to think of a quick response. "Uhhh" was all that came out. "It's fine, the food should be ready." After informing me, he made his way towards the wooden stove and poured something reddish over rice. "What is that?" I queried, eyeing the delicious smelling dish. "Japanese curry." He answered. Whilst he busied himself with serving drinks and such I noticed his wardrobe. The cuffs of his shirt were stained brown and his pants had several mud stains-A drastic change from his earlier, clean attire. He set the two plates on the table, sat down and shoveled a big spoonful into his mouth. I too began to eat, just not as enthusiastically. "Sakura…" I began tentatively, "What were you doing outside for twenty minutes-I thought you were just going to get something." I looked up from my eyelashes at a now-nervous-looking Sakura. He gulped down what he had in his mouth and answered nonchalantly "Nothing worth mentioning." He was hiding something….I just knew it! Another thing I noticed was that his parents were nowhere to be seen. "Where on earth are his parents?" Oh shit, did I just say that out loud! "I'm sorr-"

"It's alright." He interrupted. "Actually, my parents…aren't around anymore. I've never told anyone this, but, I feel that I can share everything with you. So, I shall."

Flash back-Sakura's point of view-eight years into the past:

It was unusually quiet, so much so that I could hear the wind itself. In an earnest attempt, I ran outside and, to my surprise and relief, found mother hanging laundry. "Hello dear, I see you've finally woken up-I thought you took ill. Her voice was as sweet and beautiful as the bright coloured flowers scattered across the grass on the ground beneath her. She had beautiful silky, ink hair with eyes of a deep brown that looked almost red. Her lips were as pale a pink as a rose petal and her skin resembled a flower's petals as well. My father was still at work and I had no more chores to do, so I assisted her with the laundry. One by one we hung them up together. I'd pass them from the basket to her and she'd hang them up. I didn't realize this, but one of the shirts had a needle caught in it and when I passed it to her, she pricked herself-And rather hard at that. A small drop of pure red liquid slithered from the small wound and onto the satin-like skin of her palm. It wasn't much, but I was affected all the same-That is when I discovered my interest-My fascination with blood.

It was like I was no longer myself, every sense I had was gone-Fear, love, everything. All I knew was that I wanted more of it-more of the beautiful crimson fluid. "Oh, shoot! I pricked myself…I'll go to the kitchen and stop the bleeding." I tried to apologize, but she merely told me that it was just a small jab and it was partially her fault. Once we were in the kitchen she pressed a small cloth onto the wound. It caused a small, red circle to appear on the handkerchief. It was beautiful-Then, I realized something terrible. It was almost gone-She was mopping up all of the blood! No, that couldn't happen! Barely conscious of my actions, I picked up a knife, staring at it intently but nothing going through my head. I rubbed its smooth exterior until, before I knew it, I had stuck it into her tourso. The liquid fell from the gash and trickled down her lower back. When she collapsed to the floor I could only stare in wonderment. She was growing paler-and her eyes, dimmer. It was as if her very life was drained from her. It was lovely.

Her last words were "Oh my son, I for-give…you." Then, she fell into an eternal sleep. I sat with her corpse and wept. I wept for my mother and I wept for my sanity. After crying for a few hours, my father returned home and, upon seeing his wife in a pool of her own blood and me holding a bloody knife, became infuriated. "You little-How could you?! She gave you life and you take hers' away?" He was too angry to think logically. He left to his room and told me to follow. I did, of course. His hands groped all around the top drawer of his bureau and, once he found what he'd been looking for, pulled out a shot gun. "An eye for an eye…and a tooth for a tooth. You killed her, so it's only natural that you die in order to repay her. He loaded the gun. I was going to die-I had to do something. That's when I noticed the bottle of liquor on his nightstand. I took it and threw it at his face. After being hit, he dropped the gun and became even more infuriated. "You are the son of the devil!" I know I should've been scared but…The feel of it all was so invigourating! I lifted the fallen gun and shot it at him. It was like a tiny explosion-I loved it. After he had stopped breathing, I dragged the two carcasses-My mother and father both-And stowed them away in my brother's old bedroom. I wept again that night. I loved it and I hated myself for loving it."

End flash back.

I was shocked to the point of immobility. He reached out across the table and held my hands in his. "I love you-Since the first time I saw you I knew this. Zofia, I want to share my life with you-Past and future; good times and bad. I want to change-To stop killing just for you. Please Zofia?"

My Hands felt slippery underneath his; I could barely breathe. Was I crazy, or was a murderer proposing to me? His grip began to tighten, causing me to wince. "Please Zofia, I need you." His amber eyes were deep with sorrow. He really did love me. And to be honest...I...loved him too. I loved him, although we'd just met this afternoon-I loved him, but I was scared. Multiple thoughts swam through my head. He's so nice. He'll kill me! He loves me. He's a sadistic murderer! Some were trying to convince me and others served as warnings-But, I didn't know what to do. And what could I do? I had no one to go home to. That's right. He killed her. But...Why? I had to find out. So, after a few minutes of mental preparation, I spoke.

"Sakura....I saw it-Your brother's room-I think it was, anyway. So," Tears were beginning to fill my eyes and blur my vision. "So, why did you kill her?! Why did you take my mother from me? If you love me-Then, why-Why'd you do that!?"A serious expression then fell upon his face. "I did it for you my love. I knew you'd leave and go back to her-I knew you'd leave me just like everyone else tried to." The image of the piles of corpses plagued my mind. The others...?

"I love you Zofia and I want to keep you all to myself." Ok, I was scared before, but now I was terrified! If I didn't leave soon there's no telling what he'd do-I don't even want to think about it! My heart's speed rising, I threw the dish at his face. It broke in contact with his face, the hot substance probably burning his fresh wound. Without a moment of hesitation, I scrambled to my feet and ran to the door. I ran faster than I ever had in my entire life. Footsteps advanced behind me-They sounded like they were running-or rather chasing after something-Me. I was in a state of horror-So much so that I wasn't thinking logically. Instead of running to my house, I ran deeper into the familiar woods I often sketched. It looked so much more different at night. The scenery went perfect with what was going on-A typical "murderer chase scene" setting.

Once I was deep in the woods, I slumped down next to a large pine tree, hugging my legs close to my abdomen. Footsteps came closer still-There was no point in running, they were right behind me. I was going to die tonight and I knew it. Tears spilled, my breath quickened and the steps grew louder. An eerie "thump, thump" resounded throughout the area- Sweat began to drip from my forehead as the unbearable noise grew louder, although at this point I wasn't sure if it was my heart beat or the stomping of my admirer/murderer. The noise grew louder and louder and louder, until I thought I'd surely go insane. I couldn't think, nor could I move-No matter how many times my mind pleaded my legs wouldn't budge. I awaited death and it came to me with a smile on its face.

For a while, everything was dark and a bit cold, but after some time I began to notice my surroundings. My head ached and I couldn't move my arms. Were they broken? No, there was something restraining them, but what?

I tried to pull my hands lose from the rope bounding them, but it was no use. I struggled and struggled harder and harder, but the only "rewards" I got were rope-burns decorating my wrists. I pulled my body upward so that I was now sitting right side up. "Zofia, darling, I've been so worried!" The voice was rejoicing and melodic and oh, so menacing. There was only one word in my mind right now-Death…Something that was bound to happen soon...If I'm lucky. He knelt in front of me and stroked my cheek with the gentle care of a new born's mother. His hands traveled along my body-Messaging my shoulders and stroking the back of my neck. He was trying to comfort me. I looked wearily at him and then at the restrictions. "Oh, that. Don't worry; this was just the most…Humane way to keep you from escaping-Well, easilly at least." His soft lips pressed against my cheek; before I knew it I was off of the ground and in his arms. "Oh darling, I love you so much." He cooed, bestowing a second kiss upon my forehead.

For weeks he treated me like his one and only princess. But, it was obvious that he was unstable. One moment he was as happy as a child on Christmas day and then, all of a sudden he'd be sobbing uncontrollably. He was having one of his "moments" again. Tears dripped down his chin and on to the dark, wooden floor. With a sniffle, he said "You can go. Go ahead and leave me-I won't stop you." I walked toward him, slowly, and sat beside him, pulling his head against my breast and stroking his head as if he were a small child. "Ssshh," I cooed. "I'm not going anywhere." Call me crazy, but I was beginning to develop feelings for him.


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