"Come what may, Iwill love you til my dying day."
Molly, please come. I need you, especially tonight, Kevin thought. Molly, the beautiful, smart, perfect girl that he had fallen in love with so many years ago. He needed to see her more than ever. Kevin was ready to fall to his knees and beg. But who to beg to?
His and Molly's favorite place to come was the old railroad in the middle of the forest that no one used anymore. When they were younger, they would sneak out of the parties and come here to be alone with each other. It was nothing fancy, rugged, in fact, but it was all theirs.
If Molly didn't come in ten minutes, he would leave, Kevin decided. If he ever needed to talk to her, it was tonight. It was important. He wanted to see her…to tell her before he…
And suddenly, his night lit up with a familiar touch on his shoulder. Kevin turned around and was greeted by Molly's kiss and a friendly "hey". Without thinking he wrapped his arms around her as tightly as he could, burying his face in her hair. God, he loved her. So much.
"Hey, what happened?" She traced a scratch that slashed through his brow. He groaned in pain. Kevin was a football player, and the scratch wasn't that bad. What was going on?
"Whoa, there. You okay?" Even in the dark, Kevin could see Molly's face soften with concern, as if she sensed his pain.
"He's gone," Kevin whispered bleakly.
"Wait a minute. Who's gone? What happened?" she demanded. Kevin almost smiled at that. It's so like Molly, he thought. She always wanted to get to the bottom of everything. Some called her nosy. He called her…Molly.
"Ian. He just got his permit the other day. We went out to practice driving, and that damn drunk driver…" Kevin drew in a shaky breath. Molly's eyes filled with tears, not believing what she was hearing. Ian was Kevin's younger brother, and his best friend. The two were incredibly close, and hardly ever fought, which was strange for siblings.
"No," Molly whispered.
"I guess so. He died. Funeral's tomorrow." Kevin chuckled bitterly, but didn't know why.
The tears drowning Molly's vision spilled down her cheeks. By now, she knew Ian quite well. He was a great guy. He pretended to be immature-and a lot of people bought it-but he was actually one of the wisest people she knew. And he was gone. If his death grieved her, she couldn't imagine what Kevin must've been going through.
"Kevin…I'm so sorry…" her voice trailed off. 'I'm sorry' seemed like such stupid thing to say when he was suffering such pain. Kevin just slumped down and sat against a nearby tree. Very gently, Molly slid down beside him and rested her head lightly on his shoulder while giving his hand a firm squeeze, saying nothing.
For what seemed like years, they stayed like that. Molly's mind was racing a million miles a minute while Kevin's was completely blank. In fact, if Molly had bothered to look him in the face--no, really look him in the face--she would've seen that his face was as bleak as his emotions.
After a long time, Kevin exhaled the breath he'd been holding. He started to speak again. "My mom…she checked into some depression clinic yesterday. My dad's going crazy at home, just sits in his chair and stairs into space. He won't eat, or sleep. One man down, and the whole crew's sunk." He laughed that odd, bitter laugh once again.
"They'll come back up. They just need some time. Well, a lot of time, but I know you guys can make it." Molly gave him a weak smile, but he just stared ahead.
"I don't think so," Kevin responded darkly. Molly tried desperately to be positive, even though she felt like crying too. "You'll make it," she repeated.
Another long silence. And finally, "It should've been me." It was such a statement. He said it like he was saying the sky was blue.
"No!" Without thinking, Molly gave his arm a hard punch. Kevin barely noticed. "Don't talk like that! Please. That's the worst thing you can say to me. To anyone. Don't let Ian hear you talk like that."
Kevin looked at her as though she'd gone crazy. "I'm not sure if you heard correctly. He's dead. My brother is dead."
"He's still with you. He's with all of us." Molly's face was now streaked with tears. She had to be there for him. If it was the last thing she did, she would stand beside Kevin, and help him go through this. She had heard the news that her boyfriend's younger brother had died. She could do anything now, including be strong for, when he had always been so strong for her.
But she in her wildest dreams had no idea Kevin would do what he did next. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a gun. It was already loaded.
"Kevin!" Molly gasped, praying he wouldn't do what she thought he would. Where had he even gotten that horrible thing?
"I'm sorry, Molly. But I can't take this. This is too much for me."
"Stop it! Just stop!" You're the football star of the high school. You are the guy who I cried on every day for a year after my step-mom died. You're the one who beat up Timmy Holcomb after pushed me off the slide in elementary school. You can't just quit on life!" She drew in a breath, exhausted from the effort of talking, and crying. Tears were freely gushing down her cheeks, and each breath was a gasp.
And just in that tiny, lucid moment, the normal Kevin returned. "Molly," he sounded gentle. He sounded certain…as though he was at peace. Kevin sounded as though he was a dying man writing his will. Molly couldn't stand it. "You were always stronger than me. You just didn't know it." Kevin wiped the tears from her face with his giant thumb. Then it was gone. He shoved the gun inside his ear. Molly made a whimpering sound. "No. Please, no."
"Kevin, I love you! Don't do this to me," she sobbed. He took the gun off his head for a minute. "I love you. Take care of yourself." He squeezed the trigger.
It was an indescribable sound. Molly watched as the first boy she ever kissed, her boyfriend, her best friend sank into the snow, his head a bloody pulp. She flinched as his blood splattered everywhere, giving the snow a red color. She couldn't even bring herself to cry. The shock was too great. She couldn't feel anything, hear anything, or see anything except for the look in his eyes before he died.
That brought her senses back to her. She weakly crawled behind a tree and gagged and wretched for what seemed like hours. The whole time she kept glancing back at Kevin-or his body, or whatever you would call it-and getting sick all over again.
Without Kevin she was nothing. He was the jock. She was the nerd. No one at school referred to her as Molly, but as Kevin and Molly. Molly was fine with that. Kevin defined who he was. And now he was gone. He had taken his own life, because living was too hard. Molly puked more. She wasn't a good enough reason for him to keep on living.
Molly got up and staggered towards Kevin. She kissed his lifeless, bloody lips. He was wrong about one thing: she was not stronger than him. Not even close. She couldn't live with out him. 2012 could happen and she could happily survive as long as he was there. But if he wasn't…
She picked up the gun, which was still in
his hand. She had nothing to live for anyway, so what the hell,
right? She gently put the tip of it in her mouth, tasting Kevin's
blood. She pulled the trigger and died instantly, but not before
briefly taking it out of her mouth and murmuring, "May we rest in