"Would you ever do it?" Eli asked from his spot on the floor on the next to my bed.
"Do what?" I asked, lazily trying on a pair of my sunglasses.
I frowned, sliding my sunglasses down my nose until they were resting on the tip of my nose. I raised an eyebrow. "What?"
"Would you ever run away?"
"Why would I do that?" I asked, tilting my head.
He gave me a 'Isn't-it-obvious' look and sighed. "You hate your parents."
"Hate's a strong word. I don't hate them."
"They ignore you, Lily."
"A lot of people have it worse," I pointed out.
"That's not the way to look at it. They're gone most of the time. When they're here, they're not actually here. They yell at you for no reason because they're stressed out about their jobs," he retorted.
"It's whatever," I said, shrugging.
"No," he said, sounding determined and partially mad, "it's not okay! They treat you like shit and you just take it like it's nothing. It's killing me to see you like this." He got up off the floor and kneeled in front of my spot sitting in my desk chair. He tucked a piece of hair behind my ear.
I swallowed and stared into his eyes. Me and Eli had been friends since forever, just friends. I had felt more than friendship towards him for a while now anyway, but it's not like I was ever going to tell him that. I tore my eyes away from his and forced myself to look anywhere else. My room was massive, expensive, and completely nothing like me. I didn't like big and flashy, which was exactly what it was. My parents had more money than they knew what to do with, yet they still scrambled to get more. I wanted to tell him how I felt, I just didn't know how. But like I said, it wasn't like I would ever have the guts to anyways. "Um," I said. He still had his hand on my face. I was becoming really nervous. I glanced at my reflection in the mirror. My green eyes were wide, my curly brown hair spilling over my shoulders, my face slightly pink. I swallowed again and glanced back at Eli. He wasn't even looking at me, instead his gaze was trained on something behind me. I turned around and looked out the window. My parents had just pulled up.
"Do it," Eli said.
"I can't, Eli. You know I can't."
"You're nineteen! You're old enough to make your own decisions! You're about to go to college next month!"
"Exactly!" I said, turning back around in my chair to face him, "I'm about to leave anyway, so why leave early? What's the point? It'll just cause problems!"
"I don't want to see them hurt you for another second!" he said, standing up, obviously mad.
"Eli...they're not hurting me."
"Don't lie! Please, not to me. Don't lie to me. Dump the 'I-don't-give-a-shit-about-anything' act around me, because I see right through it. We've been friends for long enough, be straight with me."
I sighed. "They're here, Eli. I can't leave them. They just got home."
"Yet nothing's going to change, is it? It's going to be exactly the same if they're gone or they're here because they won't even acknowledge your existance! They don't care about you! And I'm not even sure if they love you!"
The words stung, but there was truth in them, which made it worse. My eyes filled with tears. I looked away from Eli, not able to look at him.
He sighed. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. It's not true," he said, walking over to me and gently taking my hand in his. I couldn't help the shocks I got when our skin connected and did my best to ignore it. "Come here." He pulled me up off the chair and led me over to my bed. He sat down and patted the spot next to him. I sat down and he immediatly put an arm around me. The tears began to spill over and my shoulders started to shake. I mentally cursed my weakness. He pulled me into his arms and I let him, crying into his shoulder. Even as I was crying my heart was racing at our close proximety. "Shh, it's okay. They love you," he whispered.
"N-no...you're....right t-they don't," I cried.
He rubbed my back soothingly. "Yes they do..."
"No." I sat up abruptly, distancing myself from him. Him being too close was making it hard to think. I wiped my eyes and let out a bitter laugh. "They didn't even say hello. If I hadn't seen them pull up then I would've never guessed that they had even come home. This is shit," I groaned. I fell back against the bed, and a second later Eli did the same. I turned my head sideways and looked at his profile. He was so amazing. He had dark brown hair and intense eyes that were almost black they were so dark. He had a strong jawline and an incredibly toned body. In other words, he was hot. So many girls liked him, but he had been friends with me first. He had girlfriends, but I knew that he had a special spot for me in his heart.
In a friendly way, of course.
He turned his head and caught me staring at me. Giving me a small smile, he turned on his side, fully facing me. I turned on my side, too, and we simply laid there smiling at each other.
"College will come sooner than you think," he whispered.
"We'll be together even then, right?"
"I can't believe we're both going to Penn State."
"I can! I'm glad for it. I wouldn't survive without you," I told him truthfully.
"You'll have friends in no time. Maybe you'll even snag a boy."
My heart sank a little at the thought of me with someone else. I then thought of Eli meeting a girl. My mood started to tank when I wiped those thoughts out of my head. This was not the time for my negativity. "I don't want a boy," I whispered.
"Are you lesbian, Lily?" Eli joked.
"No!" I said, laughing. Then becoming more serious, I added, "I don't want just any boy, Eli."
He frowned slightly. "You already have a boy in mind, then?"
I glanced away from him for just a second, and then looked at him again. "Yeah...something like that."
"Do I get to know who?" he asked wiggling his eyebrows at me. My heart sank a little more. I could tell by his honest intrest that he didn't like me. If he did, he would've reacted different, maybe even gotten a little jealous, I don't know.
"Um." Everything was changing anyway. It seemed stupid not to just take a jump. It didn't matter what happened, because if it ended badly I could throw myself into college. It was coming up really soon. So that's what lead me to lightly push Eli on his back and manuver myself ontop of him, propping myself up with my hands on either side of his head. With one hand, I pulled all of my hair to one side of my head and bit my lip. He left his arms at his side and frowned at me slightly. "I, um..." The hell with it. I started leaning towards him, and then I reminded myself to take it slow, make it last. I let out a soft breath and stopped when I was about an inch away from his face. I let out another breath and bit my lip. Eli was still frowning a little, and his eyes had widend. I gave a fast smile that was gone before it began and bit my lip again. My heart was racing and I could feel Eli's own heart beating faster than normal beneath my chest. Eli breathed and I inhaled it, letting my eyes flutter closed if only for a moment. I opened them again and stared into his eyes, forcing myself not to look at his lips...yet. His eyes still looked shocked, as if he couldn't really process what was happening. I then allowed myself to look at his lips. They were perfect. They looked so soft. I leaned in a fraction of an inch, feeling the whisper of his lips against mine. His breath hitched and his whole body tensed. I knew if I looked him in the eyes I wouldn't be able to do it, so I didn't. Instead, I pressed my lips against his, and braced myself for the worst. He didn't react at first. He was absolutely frozen. The seconds before I felt him kiss me back were pure torture.
But then his mouth was moving against mine and his arms wrapped around my waist, pressing me too him. My lips tingled and if I hadn't been laying down, I was sure I would've fallen. I slipped my arms around his neck and let myself go, putting all the pressure on him. I felt his tongue run along my bottom lip, asking for entrance. I obliged and in the next moment our tongues were dancing together. I pressed myself harder to him, wanting no space between us. He suddenly pulled away and began kissing his way down my neck. I let my head fall to the side for easier access. When he kissed the hollow of my neck fireworks exploded, I sucked in my breath and then gripped his face, pulling him back to my lips. He moaned into my mouth, sending me over the edge. I kissed him with all I had.
We pulled away at the same time and I propped myself up again, staring down at him. We were both breathing hard. I bit my lip. What did this mean? His gaze travled down to my mouth, and then back up to my eyes. He put his hand on the base of my neck, and gently pulled me down to him, pressing his mouth to mine.
This kiss was faster, and afterwards I found myslef scooting off the bed. I stood in the middle of the room and stared at Eli who had proped himself up on his elbows.
"Um, I didn't...I dont..." I racked my brain for the right thing to say. "What happens now?" I asked.
Eli glanced away and heat rose in his cheeks. Whas he blushing? Actually blushing?
"I don't know," he said.
I glanced out the window.
"I thought you liked someone else?"
I felt myself sag. He didn't like me. He was clinging to the hope that I might like someone else so that we could dismiss what had happened and just move on. "I do," I said. I looked back at him and was shocked to see that he looked, what? Dissapointed? It was impossible.
"Who is it, then?" he ventured.
"Ah, well, it's um, um..." I didn't know what to say. Should I tell him the truth? Should I say antything at all?
"Is it one of my friends or something? Is that why you don't want to tell me?"
"Well...no. Not exactly."
"Then why won't you tell me?"
I could feel myself blushing.
"Who is it?"
"Um...you," I said it very quietly. I then buried my face in my hands, blushing like crazy. My heart was beating so hard I was sure that he could hear it. It was practically in my throat.
I heard the squeak of the bed and a second later my hands were being removed from in front of my face. "Me?" Eli asked, frowning.
He didn't like me. It was just a spur of the moment thing. I nodded instead of saying anything.
He smiled slightly and tucked a piece of hair behind my ear. I shivered. Why was he smiling? Was he taking joy in my nervous fit? This wasn't funny.
"Well that's good," he said, his voice low, "because I like you too."
My breath hitched and my heart rate sped up even more, if that was even possible. "You do?"
"Yeah," he breathed.
And as I looked into his eyes, I knew that he was telling the truth. A silly grin spread across my face.
"So what do you say?" he said, "Will you run away with me?"
"Run away? With you? I think not!" I said jokingly, wrinkling my nose in faux-disgust.
He laughed and wrapped his arms around me, twirling me around the room.
"We're going to college together! Isn't that running away enough?"
He stopped moving. His expression grew serious. "I can't watch them hurt you anymore. I don't care if it's for a year or a day, I don't want you to stay with them."
That may've been the sweetest thing anyone's ever said to me. "It's only another month," I whispered weakly.
"Please, Lily, run away with me."
I glanced around the room. I didn't like this life I had here. Eli was the only good part about it. But I only had one month left, why leave now? I looked back into his eyes and gave him a small smile. "Ask me again," I whispered.
"Will you run away with me?"
"Where will we go?"
"Does it matter?"
"We'll go everywhere."
I tilted my head. "Where will we live? Where will be our home?"
"Does it matter where we go or where we live or how we make it? If we're together we can survive! It doesn't matter if we're living in our car! I'd never let it get to that, I'd never let you live in a car, but if it got to that we could do it. In another month we're in college! That's it! We're gone! So why not go? Why not go a month early? The hell with your parents! I know mine won't care. We're young, Lily, but we're trapped as if we're old! This is our chance to break free, for a little while anyway until college. So I'm going to ask you one more time. Will you run away with me?"
This time I didn't even have to think. Wrinkling my nose and giving a silly grin I nodded. "All right."