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The Seagulls Did It

Article By: kukaburry
Science fiction

The world's first robot's life ends at the hands of seagulls.

Submitted:May 27, 2010    Reads: 50    Comments: 1    Likes: 1   

It walks, it talks, and it makes The Bionic Man seem like a crumpled, rusty tin can. Self-proclaimed "mad scientist" Harry Fletcher has finally done it; He has created the world's most extraordinary and versatile humanoid robot. This extravagant contraption takes on every day chores and finishes them faster than a rabbit on steroids. It does the laundry, cooks succulent dinners for the entire family and even bathes that temperamental old cat (Avoid his claws forever!). There are endless features that make this robot fun to tinker with. Just pull the left earlobe and you have a pez dispenser, and the other, a fully functioning coin sorter. A flick of the nose activates the automated voice recording and full playback. He also includes a thief-deterrent feature; just place him behind the bushes, set the eyes to "enraged" and all of your house safety worries will vanish.

Why did Harry create this perfect robot companion? The answer is simple: He wanted to impress his lady friend. This ingenious man who created the most novel robot in history can't catch himself a gorgeous lady? Alas, it seemed as though cupid's arrow would never aim for these two lovebirds. According to Mr. Fletcher, she was a wandering gypsy/fortune teller and "a diamond in the ruff." Who's the mysterious lady? Sandra Lovewright, daughter of a failed actress and a famous horse trainer. Her father, Amellio Lovewright, died in a freak fire when she was a young girl. The two young lovers tried everything to be together, but fate always ripped them apart. They both endured the cynical tortures of life. It always nibbled at their hearts like acid and corroded the roots of their emotions. Mr. Fletcher decided that if he created something to simplify their lives, they could then be together!

This is how Cybot12784.35, affectionately nicknamed Rad after Fletcher's nephew, made its way into the world. Rad's tenancy in Mr. Fletcher's home remained confidential. Why all the secrecy? Mr. Fletcher wanted Sandra to be the first person to behold this unique invention. He searched everywhere for her and his search led him to Myrtle Beach; the place they first met. Just like in a fairytale, he found Sandra on a pier, waiting for him. Mr. Fletcher showed Sandra his invention and she became overcome with joy that he had created it just to win her. When he asked her to marry him, she consented immediately.

Life became pleasurable and simple, just as Mr. Fletcher surmised it would be. According to Mr. Fletcher, their neighbor, Mr. Butaba was a failed scientist and was highly jealous of his happy life and wondrous invention. Apparently, while the Fletchers were not home, Mr. Butaba snuck inside and sabotaged poor Rad. Needless to say, when the Fletchers returned home, bedlam ensued. Rad began flinging butcher knives at the Fletchers and rampaged through the entire house, nearly demolishing it. The chaos continued on down the street and through the town, puppies kicked, stores set on fire, and rocks thrown at innocent bystanders. The problem became so serious that someone called the police to halt Rad's path of destruction.

Having been blessed with a functioning brain comparable to that of a human, Rad decided to steal the easiest form of transportation nearest him; a hang glider. Starched and pressed, he loped down the street, caught an updraft and sailed away into the torrent of clouds. The air patrol was then contacted and fighter jets came barreling through the town, shooting mercilessly at Rad. Mr. Fletcher attempted to deter them, but his ranting generated little more than rolled eyes and hushed grumbles. As Rad sailed along Myrtle Beach's coast, an angry seagull flew out of nowhere and assaulted Rad's defenseless hang glider. With the canvas shredded, Rad had nowhere to go but down. A stray bullet from one of the fighter jets severed Rad's main frame system. He crashed artistically into a child's boisterous sand castle and never rose from the rubble.

Rad's death came as a horrible blow to the Fletchers. The government has notified Mr. Fletcher that he is not allowed to create an artificial life form to replace Rad. The police compensated the couple for their tragic loss; the robot that was nearly their son. Nevertheless, Rad's impact on their life will never be forgotten. On a happier note, the couple announced that they are expecting their first child.


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