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Archibald & Jamelia: Maluji's Master Scheme

Novel By: Idgo
Science fiction

Archibald Nugget, the vampire millionaire, explores the galaxy with his cowardly servant Jamelia Soggybottom. Unfortunately they almost instantly experience a malfunction and crash land on a planet that hasn\'t yet discovered space travel. To their dismay, their only hope of leaving is by trusting a creepy stalker-like citizen of the planet and a crackpot quantum engineer. Let\'s hope it all goes as planned. View table of contents...


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Submitted:Mar 5, 2013    Reads: 3    Comments: 0    Likes: 0   

Mayor Mayonnaise was much more enthusiastic to co-operate after Archibald paid him. Well, he told Martina Belcher to "sort it out", while he was stuffing his £8,000 into his wallet witht his chubby hands. Then he kicked them out his office.

"So, um, Mr. Nugget..." said Martina awkwardly. She wasn't quite sure how to begin. "What um...what is most urgent?"

"Probably my ship," Archibald replied, feeling much better that someone was finally going to help out. "I suppose my servant needs finding too."

"Well, how about your lady friend looks for him while we can-"

"Oh, no no no!" interrupted the vampire. "No, Jessabelle isn't my 'lady friend'. We've barely met, she just followed me!" he explained, while Jessabelle casually strolled out the town hall, still humming. "I just want her gone!"

"Jessabelle!" trilled Martina. Jessabelle's eyes moved from the clock tower in the distance to the feline woman. "Archibald here needs you to do a special job for him." Martina winked at Archibald. "Can you go and find his servant for him?" she asked, speaking in a soft tone, as if Jessabelle were a child.

"Anything for Archy!!" Jessabelle shouted with glee, and instantly sprinted off down the busy streets and out of sight.

"That ought to keep her outta our way," muttered Martina, her accent changing. "C'mon then lad! Let's see this space ship you've made a mess of."

Archibald didn't exactly notice the change of tone in her voice, but it set him on edge. He cautiously led her out of Cambitsville towards the indigo meadows they crashed in. Through the markets of scurrying peopleMartina was silent, when they were alone on the deep blue hills she spoke again, and this time Archibald noticed.

"You from the League too, right?" Martina said, sounding much less elegent and much more casual. "That was Dunderland cash, it was. Nofin' like that gets passed round 'ere."

"Son of a bean!" cried Archibald, going wide eyed. "You're a...a chav!" Chavs were the common folk who had a bad habbit of mispronouncing certain letters, often 't', 'ing' or 'h'. Archibald looked down on them and wasn't keen on relying on one to help him; a lot of them were rather dumb.

"Oh, no!" Martina laughed. "Don't let the voice fool ya. Top agent of the DDL, I is. I'm only pretendin' I is posh, I'm undercovah."

"DDL?" asked Archibald. What on Nonotron is a 'DDL'? he thought.

Martina's friendly expression became one of shock. "Gosh, you don't...gah, I'm an idiot!" she cried, slapping her forehead with her paw-like hand. "Complete dough head!!"

"What's the DDL?" asked Archibald again. "Why are you undercover? Is it something to do with the mayor? Or the engineer in the tower?" He was curious about all this. So many questions!

"I thought you were in it too! Flippin' 'eck!" Martina yelled.

Archibald stepped towards the cat person. "You better tell me what is going on!" he snarled. "Otherwise I'll blow your cover, and tell the mayor that you're really a chav."

"Okay!" Martina replied sternly. "Okay..."

And she told Archibald.


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