Mary And Collins Just Don't Mix

Bloody Mary married Tom Collins

and they moved to Collinsport Maine

After a few years of maulin'

Mary drove old Tom insane.

Tom met his vampire cousin

who took Mary out on the town

People were dying by the dozen

cause Barnabas showed Mary all around.

Chorus:

Have you ever been in a fix

Mary and Collins just don't mix

Tom married the devil's daughter

and blood ran thicker than water.

Mary met his werewolf cousin

Tom had to get away and soon

Lord knows there was no lovin'

Quentin was howling at the moon.

Tom went out of his head

looking high and low to search

For the gun that shot her dead

on his last night on Earth.

(Repeat chorus)