Day 1 Enlightenment
Every morning I wake up to work without even thinking why and for what .Walk same streets wear same clothing look at same scenery. Some times I think to myself fuck this shit yet I keep on walking and I keep on working. Though today was an exception I decided to quit and look for something more suited for myself and less repetitive. When I walked in the office boss was waiting for me to make him coffee, but instead I brought him resignation letter and walked out without saying anything. When I got back home I sat down and started thinking what will I do now. At that moment I noticed world map at witch my ex girlfriend was always looking to find a place to have our honeymoon. But when we finally decided on wedding date, she died in a car accident and even though its all ready been a year, I didn't touch a thing in our house. So I grabbed the map marked places she wanted to go to then sold my house and walked out. The world changed it wasn't same scenery anymore it grew larger and even though I was still walking same road it didn't feel so empty cause now I had no idea where I will be tomorrow what people I meet and what jobs I will have to do. The streets were empty not a single person, common sight for a midle of the day in town since every one is working and trying to survive every day. But for me days stoped years ago with white flashing lights and dark red filling the grass under my shaking feet. But there was no one to blame for a man driving the car had heart attack and died carrying much more regrets then Monika. If you could only seen here allways smiling chargin forward like a child nevere looking back hoping for better future and draging every one with her. But because of depression I forgoten why I loved and what was her dreams, but now I remember now I can try to fullfill it. While I walked thinking of the past and looking for reasons why now I have left my birthplace I reached an empty buss station. It was quiet as if some one sucked all life from the place except for counter lady making wispering noices as shea read some kind of broshure.
I approached counter and knocked on the window, old woman looked at me obvioaly disspleased that I disstubed her analysis of the material she was so interested in.
Yes how may I help you?
-That answer felt like it was said by mashine-
One ticket to anywhere just as far as possible from here.
-She looked even more disspleased-
Listen i'm not a map so come back when you know where you wish to go.
After my failed attempt to blindly charge in what ever direction I sat down and let what just happened sink in and I do not mean right now but today, how I left all behind chasing a dream that was suppose to die with my loved one. Part of me obviosly wanted to go back, but remembering how I spent my life so far I decided no more detours. And so I opened the map and serched for closest location to visit. As i analysed the map day ended and I decided to spend a night in buss station for hotel cost money, which I will need in the future buying food