unDecidedNites

Wantin' all my words to come out right 

'cause its getting hard to spend these nites 

having to hold everything inside 

tired of feelin' like I've died

so,here goes nothin' but all of me 

hope that I can make you see 

without you simply laughin'

'cause I'm sayin' sorry for what happened

never thought in my wildest dreams

I'd be seein' the things I seen

feel like I'm here tryin' to explain excuses

which makes it harder to write this.... 

Been lookin' for as many ways as I can

just to forget everything that I am

no matter what I say, I'm feelin' the opposite

keep thinkin' that I got something to prove

runnin' to smoke away the truths

still short of breath from the last hit

seen how I was livin' thru my ego 

that never left the streets 

and my pride never knew defeat 

my addictions jsut wouldn't let go

so when it came time to step up

and be all of the promises I made

didn't happen 'cause I fell for the hate

and my fears wouldn't ever let up

just kept buildin' inside my head

that only let me give people half

before I resorted to this act

bein' cold hearted lookin' dead

playin' this game back & forth

with myself I done lost my mind

so the losses add up & every nite

I'm tryin' to just ignore

everything that I know is right.....

So, I'm lookin' for something to say 

or at least be able to explain

whats goin' on inside of me

how I didn't want to see

everything end like it did & how hard

it was seein' I was close, but yet so far

from being everything I was suppose to

for reasons it was you that I came to

didn't know I was riskin' more then I should

 needin' to give more then I could

 found out everyone has a weakness

  burn so much that you're sleepless

keep tryin' to put the pieces back together

 hopin' that it will all get better

 'cause it always seems to remain the same

  and it ain't ever easy tryin' to understand

  that it takes a lot to be this man

   so I'm startin' from the beginin'

        tryin' to re-write this endin'.....