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The hard truth about my life and how people look at me

Submitted:May 14, 2013    Reads: 18    Comments: 0    Likes: 0   

To my friends I'm spirited, confident, outgoing, fun-loving, athletic, strong, responsible, smart, understanding, funny, flirty, and love aware. I never cry, never let things get to me, and always take criticism and make myself better from it. I'm a happy girl, and popular. I'm so spirited because it's the only thing I can really be loud about without getting in trouble. I act confident but on the inside I constantly worry about stuff. I'm outgoing so that I can make other people happy even if I can't always be. I'm fun loving because I've seen enough variations of death to know that life is short. I'm athletic and physically strong because I push myself farther than I should and I can't stand to let myself get fat. I'm emotionally strong because I hide my emotions. I'm responsible because I had to grow up quickly and was always around adults. I'm smart because I feel the need to be perfect for my parents and so that I don't end up a failure at life. I'm understanding because most of the stuff I've had to go through myself. I'm funny because I like seeing people laugh and knowing that I made an impact no matter how small. I'm flirty but honestly I only want that one special person. I'm an expert at love and can see everyone else's, and get them together, but can't find or keep it myself. I never cry…in public but at home I often do when I'm alone in my room. I never let things get to me, or at least I act like it, when in reality I'm aware of every comment. I always take criticism and make myself better from it in hopes that I'll be that perfect person everyone wants. I'm happy because I know how to lie, and these are reasons why I'm popular... I can now successfully fake a smile, fake a laugh, and fake my happiness. I've become another person than I was prior to my moving; back home nobody would believe that I was quiet; here I must be in an amazing mood or drunk if I'm being my old self. I've gone through so much to be so young; maybe that's how I matured so quickly. I've already experienced death (a few times actually), heartbreak, and true love. All of this is the hard truth that nobody sees.


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