A Girl Who Has Everything

I have never been a kid anyone would feel sorry for. I never have felt sorry for myself. My life is perfect from the outside. Enough money, food, friends. I am an outspoken child, everyone around me laughs at what I have to say. But I have always been a free-thinker. I see the things around me and twist them into what I think they mean. I see past the shallow overcoating many imply when they say things. I don't feel much. When I do I feel too much. I haven't had a best friend since second grade and have had my first true love ever this year. No one knows who it is. I can't trust people. I can't depend on people. I can't see why I should depend on others when they can just betray you. You know who can never betray you? Yourself. I need myself and that's it. No, actually. I depend very hard on others. I always need to be with someone when I'm in public and what other people think about me matters way too much. But deep down, I know that I don't need anyone. I'm a person who needs people on the outside, but deep in my core I know I don't. I don't tell people anything, so I have decided to write down my thoughts on this journal. Today's entry is a shorter entry, later they will be longer depending on what the subject matter is. Just what I experience that day. Entries will be regular, but never at a scheduled time. Thanks for reading.