Still I Sit

I sit here wondering how, over the years, I’ve changed

Angers all but consumed me, now its bottle rage

Lust has twisted my brain and clouded my perception

The mask and reality fused, my lifelong deception

The way I used to care is floating away from me. I’m seemingly

A man without emotions or cares, living dreamingly

Girls, drugs, alcohol, all whipped me. I was a slave to intoxications

My mind still shines through, but the dark still battles. Self-altercations

In my head. My head now a reel for the world’s movie

I am stuck at this…fork in the road, desperate for something to move me

My strength increases, and I must catalyze the reaction

Start a movement, a revolution, be the main attraction

But first and foremost I must establish reality

Life’s not a game, but we still suffer Fatalities

So to the world, I’ll hold my unorthodox shroud

I’ll be my own drummer to march to, hell a whole band. Loud

Louder than all the ignorant

Belligerent.

Degenerants.

We see

See how I’ve grown? I’ve concocted my own destiny.

After a year’s time, I’ve decided to be myself

But I still slip and tumble through delusions of grandeur and wealth

I still need to discover just who I am before I continue

I need something new, maybe a change in venue

Ready to matriculate and show the world my face

Get passed all this, shock them, and see if they keep pace

I’m prepared to change the world, every action a necessity

So I implore you to come, join, and bask in success with me…