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The Scars I Hide

Poetry By: numnums
True confessions



Cutting, hurting and feeling any physical pain was a way for me to escape the emotional pain I felt.
I've gone back to cutting after 3 years.


Submitted:Aug 17, 2012    Reads: 112    Comments: 9    Likes: 6   


The Scars I Hide.

The past was horrible, all the blood.

The pain that brought me to silent screams.

The tears that fell, mixing with drops of scarlet.

.

The long-sleeve shirts, the long pants,

The scarves, gloves and high socks,

Wornto hide the evidence.

.

The wounds that are tattooed on my skin,

Foerever embedded along my body,

Suddenly look so vulnerable again.

.

The razor, shaking in my hand,

Hovers over the previous cuts

That were made in places unseen .

.

Hiding it all was hard.

Closing myself from anyone, everyone.

" They'll all judge. They all will. "

.

Trust was an issue. Friends were void.

It was better alone, than with company.

It was better if no one knew.

.

The fake smiles,

the lies my mouth made,

The lone act that everthing was fine.

.

Now here I am again,

Alone on the bathroom floor,

With tears running down my face.

.

After theseyears of self-rehabilitation,

Fixing myself, opening up to others,

Its all now worthless.

.

The emotions that kill me inside though

Are like poison down my throat.

Let it out, let it out.

.

I close my eyes,

Memories, past and present,

Stabbing my heart like spears.

.

I take a deep breath with eyes shut tight.

And lower the small blade

Down onto my skin.

.

For the first time since that time years ago,

I see the red liquid pouring out of my flesh again

Because of my own free will.

.

The bright colour stares back at me,

Before the pain rushes to my nerves

And letting the tears burst out again.

.

For a moment, a short moment,

All the emotions disappear

And all I feel is the pain that takes away pain.

.

Now the floor is splattered in red,

And my mind is closed off and empty.

The poison's gone, gone for now...

alt





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