January 22, 2014
So then, back for round two. Had you hidden away for quite some time, didn't I journal? Well, let me not wait and get you up to date. We begin with the sad fact of the world that your first relationship is going to be difficult, ALMOST DEFINITELY because of others around you. In my case, I'd not quite call it a 'relationship' as such; let's try 'flirtationship'.
This story starts at The Academy. In my many years, I continue to see new people come and pass, such as it was. Eventually, around the 2011-2012 school year we had a pretty solid-staying set of students. Still, not quite the best people out there, and I suppose I did fight with one of them (twice) before he left. Y'know the annoying thing about Jamaicans? They have a very foreign concept of what a 'friend' is.
For example, if I were at your school, and every day I'd - steal your books, steal your calculator, steal your pen, hide your schoolbag, get a glimpse of how you did your homework "just to make sure I did it right", etc - would you call me a 'friend' exactly? Well that's what Jamaicans infallibly expect you to do, and I wasn't so compliant.
Anyway, deviating from the topic. In the 2012-13 year there was only one new student - though I'm under the impression she already knew two of the people there before arriving - named [a name I probably won't say soon for obvious reason]. Interestingly, she is not the person this story starts with. For that, we go to the afternoon side of life.
[Other person's name] is a swimmer in the same club as me - actually, the very same person I mentioned in my last entry. I don't know why - I mean, I still REALLY don't know why - but I had a crush on this girl starting around late 2011 (which may or may not have been part of the reason for my swimming improvements). Being a Christian, however, I decided to wait and pray about it - especially considering I was like 12 and probably didn't have any idea of anything close to real 'love'. Eventually I stopped and started talking to myself, saying - and I remember in quite good detail - this:
"Dude, what are you doing? I can't understand why you're even considering this. The two of you are barely friends, have nothing in common other than Asian heritage (being BARELY for you), and never talk. Look in front of you, and she's not there; remember who is?" At that moment, I had my closest experience to what I'd call a moment of clarity. When I looked up, I was sitting at the desk behind [1st name].
I think over the years I've found my personal failings include missing the obvious and making hasty and irrational descisions. [1st name] and I started talking pretty regularly from the first year she came, we have a lot in common and she's a Christian as well. In the 13-14 year as well, I've been picking up on some signs that she might like me as well.
Back on the other side of life, I made a significant descision after 4 months of research, which I hope to uphold: I will switch to triathlon and compete at the Americas YOG qualifier in May. Seems a longshot to switch sports at such short notice, but I've been fairly confident, and after starting my updated training schedule, I'd say it's totally possible.
Unfortunately, nobody in my family thinks the same. My mom comes up with numerous excuses as to why it's not an option, including the most honest of them all, that word-i-wont-say called money. My dad is pretty OK with the idea, but at the same time seems reluctant to help, such as if I need him to drive alongside for a run.
I guess my life's in an up and down position right now, good things at school (which I've only been able to say maybe two or three times in my life), bad things in training, but I'm sure I'll be able to stick it out 'till the end if I don't catch a death of it first.
I'll keep you posted,