5 years later
I spent five years in New York my birth place, looking for Rowan the woman who had helped me and opened my eyes in so many ways. I never found her. I gave up, although that emptiness is still in me. Rowan gave me the love I never had and I went looking for that but I never found it. But I did want to go back to those places we went to together during those times. So I asked Eleanor to take me back to Bryson City. I haven't called her 'mom' since I turned fourteen. I realized that if there was no motherly love there is no reason to call her mother. The penthouse we lived in was comfy but I really missed my huge house in Bryson City. I missed the way that river in the back yard would freeze up during the winter and I could skate on it. The way it would rise during spring and bubble during summer. I loved to see colorful leaves floating on the surface of the river in autumn. This place was made for me, and this is where I'm going to be.
I went into my room which was still decorated all in pink and purple from five years ago. I'm not a little girl anymore so it's time to redecorate. I went downstairs taking my keys out of my back pocket.
"Where are you going?" asked Eleanor.
"None of your business" I said non-chalant. She had gotten used to the disrespect like I had gotten used to her unloving nature. I went into my white grand prix and drove off. I missed the long driveway outlined with trees. It looked beautiful right now, completely green but I liked them more during fall. I got to the end of the driveway and I slowed down and sped off into the main road. Not many people drove by the road so I took it that there wasn't any one coming by. I was wrong, blue and red lights flashed behind me so I had to stop. A chase would be amazing but I'm not the jail type. So I pulled over and put my window down.
"Shit." I whispered seeing that this was a police woman. I could easily change the minds of men but women were my weakness. None of them liked me making it more difficult to convice them to not give me a ticket.
"Do you know why I stopped you?" Why is it that every cop has to ask that?
"Cuz you wanted to see my pretty face?" It's what I would tell a male cop. But I didn't know how to work it with a woman.
"Yea definitely " she laughed "you were speeding. I need your license and registration."
"I have a permit" I said hating the fact that I wasn't eighteen yet.
"That means you would get it taken away."
"Please don't take it away."
"Hand it over kid." I gave it to her and she looked at it.
"New york permit?"
"Yes, I just moved down here. Just today and it would be so bad if I get my permit taken away on the first day." I said in a sweet voice. She shook her head.
"I'll give you just this one warning, if you speed again you will get your permit taken away. Is that understood?"
"Here." She said handing it back. She went back into her car and drove. I sat for a few minutes loving my luck. I do need to be careful though, after this one I'm pretty sure that bitch is going to be looking out for me. I turned my car onto the road and headed for a furniture store. But first I would drive by my favorite cafe'. I bought a latte' and went to my car. I hadn't tasted something this delicious for five years and it felt like getting a mouth orgasm. A dark old man knocked on my window. I pulled it down smiled and said "what do you sell?" He showed me a black fancy looking bed sheets; exactly what I've been looking for. It looked very cushiony, and it had two pillow covers, two sheets and a comforter..
"How much do you want for it?"
"Forty?" I took out a fifty dollar bill handed it to him and told him to keep the change. He handed me the bagged up set through the window.
"Thank you so much miss." He said kissing the dollar bill "God bless you"
"Do you know by any chance if there's a furniture store around here?"
"Oh yes, Robert's furniture store. You go that way" he said pointing down town "and you won't miss it, it's the biggest building in town."
"Thank you very much." I felt good inside, helping people in these conditions made me feel like a different person who wasn't so selfish. I went to Robert's furniture store and there were some of the best matresses I had ever seen and they were cheap. I was so excited, I felt like a fat kid in a candy store. I bought a bed that was the most comfortable bed I had ever seen. Several pillows because I loved sleeping with pillows surrounding me. It reminded me of when I was younger, Pearl and Marcia would sleep with me; One on each side hugging me. We gave each other love, since because of our beauty we never had any close friends. The kind you can tell everything to. I guess I did in a way, Destiny was my closest friend and I made her life hell when I was here and yet she never hated me. Continuing on my furniture shopping spree, I walked around the store and saw the most gorgeous vanity set. The small drawer was a glossy black as was the mirror but the mirror was silver on the inner edge before the mirror touched. The seat was simple and yet very comfortable. I made up my mind that this had to be mine no matter what. I saw a long storage bin with a cushioned lid making it comfortable to sit on. I found a black leather one that I liked. These would be the colors of my new room black and white. I went around the store looking at what I wanted and I bought it. The furniture store would deliver my stuff right away and put it where I wanted it.
I got home and showed them to my room, they were kind enough to get rid of my furniture as a kid. They brought in half of my furniture when Eleanor noticed.
"Rhiannon! What are you doing? Do you know how much that furniture cost?" Her yell screeched across the hallway.
"Don't know don't care, Eleanor."
"Stop! Take out all this shit!" She yelled at the workman "Fucken cheap shit!" Anger shot through me and with out thinking I pinned Eleanor to the wall with my arm pushing in on her throat.
"Shut the fuck up, get out of here and mind your own damn business." I said in a low threatening voice.
"Rhiannon what has gotten into you?" She asked in a choked frightened voice. I let her go and returned my attention to the men who were almost done putting in my new furniture. Eleanor stood against the wall staring at me in fright. I was done being at her bec and call. She ran to her room crying and slammed the door. I put on a smile for the men who had announced to me that they were done. I gave each of them one hundred dollar tips and they left as happy as ants in a pile of sugar. I extended the sheets and comforter on the bed and threw three normal sized pillows and many other zebra printed small ones. I went out on to my balcony and stared at the luscious green trees. A crow flew and perched on the wrought iron of my balcony. There was something I loved about wrought Iron my table and chairs on my balcony were wrought iron and of course the seat for my new vanity mirror was wrought iron. Of course Eleanor was also seemingly made of wrought iron she never had nor will have a heart.
It was night already and I was getting ready with my denim mini skirt, white tube top and and white stilletos. I straightened my hair, put on my make up got my purse and went down stairs.
"Where do you think you're going?" I didn't stop and turn around or say even a word. I went out the door and heard her heals quickly coming after me.
"Rhiannon! It's our first day here and you're already going out clubbing?" Since I didn't pay attention to anything she said she grabbed my arm and spun me around.
"Will you shut up and leave me alone?" I yelled "I'm going even if you don't agree with it."
"For what? So you can get with another man ten years older than you so he can get you pregant again?" In New York I had been with a man who was about twenty years older than me. He had a wife and two daughters a bit younger than me. He bought me anything I wanted, I even moved out of the penthouse I was in with my mom for a few months until I got pregnant and had another abortion. If I didn't feel like bearing a kid when I was twelve what in the world was going to make me want to bear one at fifteen? After that I had had a few other guys and three more abortions. I never had any remorse, Eleanor had been great in teaching me to care only of my self and now she's realizing she has created a monster.
"Maybe." I said answering her question and took out my car keys. She ripped them out of my hands and I stared at her. She had never dared to do that because she couldn't stand having me mad at her. But this time I wasn't going to lag around the house mad because she took my keys away. I started walking down the drive way.
"Where are you going? Isadora!" God! I hated that name. As soon as I turn eighteen I will get that name changed.
"Hitch hiking. Hoping someone will put me out of my misery. Free me of this horrible life I've had." I yelled back still walking.
"Fine!" She yelled in surrender. I turned around and stared at her "Fine, you can have your keys back." She layed them on the trunk of my car and walked in the house. I happily walked back to my car, got in it and drove off.