A week after I started feeling sick, Landon dropped the bomb.  He was too young to tie himself down.  He wanted to travel the world and work on his career as a cage fighter. He was moving to Australia to follow his dream.  I was sitting on the sofa when he told me.  I couldn’t breath let alone say something.  Everything was going so well. We were a couple doing couple things together. Having home cooked meals, watching movies, cleaning together and once in a while we went clubbing.  He couldn’t be serious.  Maybe I was sicker than I thought.  I had brain damage from the virus I picked up.  He met someone else.  I couldn’t get my mind around it.  Hadley was right.  He was a player.  She said it many times in the past two months.  A hard dog to keep on the porch were her words. 

“But what about us” I said more calmly than I was.

“It was nice, Laken.  But like I said, I’m young.  I have my whole life ahead of me and I’m too stirred up to commit now.”

“You said you loved me” I said and started to cry.  It felt like someone was stabbing me in the heart with a fork.  My heartache was so intense I felt it physically. 

“I do love you but I can’t settle down now.  You’ll move on and find someone else.  Someone better than me.”

No no no I shouted in my head.  This can’t be happening!

“How can you say you love me but you’re leaving me? You lied!” I screamed “You lied!” My screams turned into sobs and I broke down.  I was crying like a baby and my whole body shook.  Landon tried to take my hands but I shook him off.

He stood back and said “I’m leaving tomorrow morning.  I’ll stay the night if you want to.”

“No” I sobbed “Just leave me alone. Just go.”

I heard him going into the bedroom and taking his stuff but I didn’t dare open my eyes.  I couldn’t see him walking away.  I sat on the sofa rocking myself and crying.

“I’m sorry, Laken.  I didn’t deserve you and you don’t deserve this.  But I have to do this.  I’m so sorry. I’ll love you forever, you know? Never forget.”

With that he turned and walked away. I opened my eyes and saw the love of my life walking out my front door.  I took in his gorgeous body and curly hair for the last time.  He never turned around to look at me.

                                                ********

After crying for hours, I called the girls and told them what happened.  Fifteen minutes later they arrived with reinforcements in the form of wine, tequila (Shay’s idea obviously), chocolates and action movies.  “No need for soppy love stories” Hadley muttered. 

I told them exactly what happened and cried the whole time.  I never realized I had so many tears in me.  Good grief.

Shay kept making sympathetic noises and Hadley paced up and down the sitting room.

“Bastard” she said.

“Baschtard” Shay copied, already jarred on tequilas.

I wasn’t too sober myself.  Two bottles of wine later I still felt like crap.     

I kept on wailing what am I going to do without him. I can’t live without him.  He whas my schoulmate, you know?

“Oh pull yourself together, Scarlet ‘O Hara!” Hadley said. “He’s just a man.  A useless no good son of a bi...”

“Whaaaaaaa” I started crying again.

Hadley ran to me and started apologizing. “Hon, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

After calming me down, which involved half a bottle of Tequila, we all got into my bed. 

We fell asleep with arms around each other.

At least I could depend on them.