It's been a weeks since the day I said yes
to move in with Tanner. We moved in a couple of days after that.
Hunter and Emmy moved into an apartment down the hall with Asher.
I'm 12 weeks pregnant now and still puking everything up. I was
lying in bed almost too tired to move. Tanner walked in and sat
down on the edge of the bed and looked at me. "Hey." I smiled
"Hey, how are you feeling?" He asked moving
the hair out of my face.
feel a little bit better than before." I smiled. He leaned down
to gently kiss me. He pulled a piece of paper out of his
"Baby I, I got this in the mail today." I
saw the tears forming in his eyes. I sat up quickly and looked at
his papers. I knew them too well.
"How long?" I asked as the tears threatened
to fall from my eyes.
months in Afghanistan Baby." I looked up at him as the tears
started to fall at a fast pace.
"The baby would be born by then." He closed
his eyes as his tears fell.
know." I broke into sobs. Tanner pulled me to him and put his
hand on my small baby bump. I threw my arms around his neck and
held him tightly with all my 'pregnancy strength'.
can't do this alone." I sobbed into his shoulder. "I can't I'm
too young."He kept rubbing his hands on my bump slowly. "I can't
do this Tanner."
know baby, I don't want you to do this alone." He placed his on
my shoulder as his shoulders shook with sobs. I held onto him
close for comfort. I don't know who needed it more in this
moment. Me or him. How can I have a baby alone? Without him
there? I'm only 18, now I'm pregnant, and the father won't be
there for his birth. I'm going to be alone. All alone. My heart
was breaking, hard and fast.
love you." I whispered kissing him. He kissed me back, tasting
the salty tears on his lips.
love you too." I pushed him onto his back with the little
strength I had left. I pressed my lips firmly on his needing this
more than anything, but not knowing if I have the energy. I felt
him pull his head back to look at me.
"Baby you're tired." He said holding my
face. My hands started to go down to the waist band of his
"Tanner please, please just please can we
do this. I need it." He looked at me, running his eyes over my
don't know Ryan, I, I don't know if this is a good Idea. You're
really tired." He ran a run down my face. I looked at
"Please Tanner I need this more than
anything right now. I need to be close to you." I said in a shaky
"Okay, baby." He gently flipped us over
kissing down my throat……
Tanner heard the door knock causing him to
lean his head up to look at the closed bedroom door. He sighed
moving from around me. He pulled on some shorts walking out of
the room closing the door silently. He opened the front door as
Hunter was about to knock again. "Hey." Tanner moved out of the
way letting him in.
"Hey." He said rubbing his eyes. Hunter
looked at him.
"Did I wake you up?" He nodded. "I'm sorry
I thought you would be awake it is only 6.30." Tanner shrugged
"Let me guess, you told her." He nodded
"How the hell am I going to say good bye to
her while she is pregnant with my baby?" He asked looking up at
him grabbing a beer out of the frig.
"How am I going to leave Emmy and Asher? I
don't know how I'm going to do it, but I'm going to have too. We
will get through this, together. Brothers from another mother?"
Tanner smiled at him.
"Brothers from another mother." Tanner
handed Hunter a beer. Hunter took a swing of his.
"What are we going to do?" Hunter
have no idea." Tanner sighed taking a swing of his
"Cheers." Hunter raised his glass. They hit
"To our girls." Tanner
"To our girls." They both finished off
blinked my eyes as my phone rang next to my head.I groaned and
picked it up.
Dad* Hey Baby Doll
Me* Hey Dad, how are you?
Dad*For being in the ass end of the desert, pretty good. How are
Me*I'm tired really.
Dad* Aw baby what's wrong?
Me* Tanner got his orders last night and its really hitting
Dad*You know Baby it's his job.
Me* Yeah but Hunter is leaving too and its almost time for TJ and
Logan to leave too. Everyone is leaving.
Dad* Aw Baby they don't want to leave but they have too.
Me* I know but it still hurts so much.
Dad* I know baby, I know
Me* I miss you Daddy
burst into tears holding my pillow tightly to my
Dad* Shh Ryan don't cry.
Me* I can't help it Daddy I miss you so much.
Dad*I miss you too, so much. I think of you and your mom as well
as your brothers. I love you Baby Doll.
Me*I love you too Daddy.
Dad* I have good news baby.
Me* What would that be?
Dad* I got my date Ry
Me* You, you, you did?
Dad*Yeah. I get back March 14th
Me* Dad that's amazing. Have you told Mom?
Dad*Of course. She was my first call.
Me* Make me feel loved Dad, nice job
Dad* Come on you are my second call that's what matters.
Me*Sure sure, says the marine that said it.
Me* I still love you.
Dad* I love you too.
took a deep breath, closing my eyes.
Me* Dad I need to tell you something.
Dad* Sure, you can tell me anything
Me* Dad, I'm pregnant………..