............... Flynn held me tighter as I started to shake.
“B you’re going to be okay” he murmured “J.J.’s going to be okay” I nodded
“Breana” I looked up as Gina walked over to me. “We really thought he’d told you” she looked the same way he had when he’d tried to explain it all to me.
“Did you get your car?” I asked standing up and pulling away from Flynn a little he still kept a protective arm round me “I’m sorry for just taking it”
“Its okay honey” James smiled “I want to know how you got back here so fast? Because J.J. took the 11pm flight” I raised my eye brows "that was the flight I should have been on.
“She’s Marine Corps property” Flynn butted in.
“I got a ride with a Marine flight”
“Wow I didn’t know you could do that” Brody whistled.
“Oh you’re not supposed to but when that’s…” I pointed to Grandpa who was talking to some parents of Marines that had just left “Your Grandpa it tends to help”
“He’s the boss” Flynn Sighed. Ariana walked away from Rachel and came over to me.
“Are you and J.J. together?”
“Kind of” I nodded.
“So who’s this?” Rachel snapped looking at Flynn. Flynn looked at me and raised one eye brow.
“Rachel don’t you think you did enough” Brody snapped at her.
“This is Flynn”
“Your Brother right” James held out his hands to Flynn “Breana spoke about you”
“Oh great thanks sis I bet there wasn’t a good word” he chuckled
“All good” Brody offered his hand as well “You a Marine?”
“Not yet I’ve got 6 months left in school but then yes” I looked down thinking about Flynn leaving on top of all of this really wasn’t what I wanted.
“Honey” Gina took my hand “He never loved her”
“He’s told me… but I need to take this with him at my pace” I sighed.
“Of course” she nodded
“Hey you need a job as a cowgirl” Brody laughed ‘Come to the ranch”
“Thanks” I smiled. “We have to get to school” I wanted to get away from the glares of Rachel I wasn’t ready to take her to task yet and I might even let Riley do it for me.
“School here” Ariana pulled a face
“Yep we live about 5 minutes from here and got to school here” Flynn nodded.
“Call us if you need anything… or just to talk” Gina said pushing a piece of paper into my pocket. “Or if you need me to explain things” I nodded
“Nice to see you all again” I began to walk away.
“Hey” I looked round as Brody caught up “I’m not talking to my sister after she did what she did and I think J.J. struggled seeing her today” he said “I have a winter round up over New years for friends and family… I think J.J would like it if I invited you and your family and friends”. I saw Flynn’s face light up.
“I’m not sure what we’ll be doing yet this new year” I smiled politely
“I promise you if you come you’ll have fun” Brody smiled.
“Lets see how the next 5 weeks goes until then” I sighed “Id it okay if I let you know right before Christmas”
“Of course” he nodded holding his hands out to Flynn again “Nice to meet you”
“You too” Flynn smiled “Come on B” he put his arm round me and led me outside. “Well that was awkward and what the hell was with the bitter looking sister”
“I think she had something to do with J.J.’s wife being at the same place I was” I shrugged.
“I’m surprised you haven’t kicked her ass”
“Till I saw J.J. today I wasn’t sure what I was going to do” I got in the truck and waited for him to walk round.
“So you decided to suck the soul from a Marine” he grinned.
“I decided to give him a second chance… you promised you’d have my back”
“And I do… did you see me floor him” I smiled and leant back in the seat and watched the base go by.
“Hey schools that way” I said fighting to keep my eyes open.
“Yeah and with the way you’ve been for the past few weeks” he pulled into the driveway at home “Mom called the principla and she’s pulling you out for a week to try to get your head sorted”
“And you’re just telling me now?” I said suddenly wide awake “I’m not some mental patient”
“Well actually I said to have you committed for a while but she things a trip North to Minnesota for a while would be good” he grinned “I get to go too and so does Riley”
“We’re going to See Grandpa and Nana” I said still in shock
“Yup… but I think you need to have some sleep before we go anywhere” he shrugged. “Riley’s bringing all the school work we need”
“When was this arranged?”
“This morning I called mom at work to tell her what you were doing?” he smiled getting out of the truck “she told me to bring you home and make you go to bed”
“Jeez” I groaned but I was more relieved I didn’t have to face going to school after faxing up to J.J. we walked into the house.
“I’ll go make you some hot chocolate” he scooted me to the stairs “Mom’s going to be here by lunch time so please don’t make me look bad” he begged.
“Would I” I sighed he rolled his eyes and walked off to the kitchen. I went up to my room and pulled off my clothes and put on my P.J’s and pulled the covers over me in bed, I saw the edge of the envelope sticking out of my pocket in my jacket I reached for it and turned it over in my hands before opening it. I unfolded the paper inside.
I don’t know if I’ll get to see you before I leave… or for that matter if you’ll still be around Lejeune when my deployment is done. I know you’ll be done with High school so you could have left the base.
I know I’ve apologized so many times for what I did (that it must be sounding hollow right now), but tonight when you actually let me talk to you I thought you might still feel something for me the way you looked showed me how much I’d hurt you and when you said that I’d taken your heart and your trust and ruined it… well it made me see how much you really did care for me before I screwed it up. More than I deserved.
I’m so in love with you and I can’t see a way to get out of this whole I’ve dug for myself. I’ve broken the heart of the only person I can say I’ve truly loved, the person that I know loved me for doing what I do and the fact that you understand that the U.S.M.C. does hold the trump card when it comes to the life of a Marine and those closest to him is something I’ve never experienced and it’s a scary thing that you know when you need to step back, like the night I got called in when we were out at dinner, you never batted an eyelid to it. You got the to go boxes and we left… believe me it’s happened before and let’s say the other party wasn’t happy and made me suffer for it.
You know it’s more than the Uniform it’s a job that not everyone can do… I let you and the Corps down when I didn’t live by the Semper Fi… I let myself down letting go of the most beautiful girl I’ve ever known and I’m talking not just about the smoking body and sexy eyes… you have more heart than anyone I’ve met you’d die for your friends and your brother and I’ve met some tough Marines but it doesn’t compare to the toughness I’ve seen from you, Riley your Mom and Grandma.
I made a huge mistake and I hope that this letter doesn’t get returned to me unopened because… well I really don’t know what I’d do without some sign from you that maybe we have a chance of at least being friends on even a passing in the street and saying hi sort of level I can’t imagine not seeing you in my life.
I kick myself for not having you lay in my arms theses last few nights before I leave… I dreamt of it before lost you… I used to think it would be the perfect thing, to have you in my arms in my bed telling you how much I was in love with you and that I was going to come back to hold you again… to feel your lips on mine… but I had to go and destroy it ruin the best thing that has ever happened to me.
Breana I’m sorry and I love you even if you can’t love me back I understand.