My first time having sex did not leave me wanting more. In fact, I couldn't wait for it to be over. It was painful and awkward- all the things we learn in hindsight but never a thought in the mind of a curious teenager. Even though my boyfriend was a proud nine inches, I had to ask if it was all the way in. I wanted to brace myself for more pain.
Why would people put themselves through this when they can just make out? I don't think I want to go past third base again.
I distracted myself with the hockey game that was on the TV to my right as my boyfriend plunged away.
Why did the Leafs always manage to give it away in the last five minutes? And why were the lights still on in here?
As he was finishing I couldn't help but notice the ridiculous expression on his face. I wondered if the reason couples always had sex with the lights off was because they knew what they were doing was painful, silly, and ultimately for naught. Darkness made the act bearable and forgiving should a body part slip out of place. Additionally, you were spared the close-up, unflattering expressions that your partner was no doubt making as he or she neared orgasm. For the next six years I never once had sex with the lights on.