Chapter One: Ryan
My sister has shut me out,
but I have Barbie, so i'm fine.
Well, not fine is general,
but fine with that.
I honestly know that generally I'm not okay.
The door has been locked for five minutes total, because Barbie and I are being insane. She stripped her shirt off, knowing I wouldn't care; It wouldn't phase me the slightest bit. She tossed her camera to me and said "I want to remember being a fun person. Capture that."
And I do, over and over again. I take pictures of her laughing as her fragile hands wrap around her torso. Her almost black eyes are sparkling and I feel like I'm living in her moment; like i'm witnessing a miracle.
After a few more pictures, she snatches the camera "Now, I'm thinking of something for you Ryan Adams." She flashes a heart-melting smile and I'm a puddle, but because she's like my sister and I know she'll always be there.
She dashes to my desk and snatches my flashy, red-rimmed sunglasses and slides them onto my face. I smile and chuckle. I know she wants to bring out something special in me and I know she can.
She puts her finger at the corner of her mouth and looks up to think. I know she's found brilliance when she snaps her fingers and raises her eyebrows at me in warm anticipation.
Barbie rips her bow out of her perfectly-sculpted hair and pins it neatly into the right side of my soft lockes. She reaches in her back pocket and pulls out a cigarette from the little carton. I giggle as she presses it between my lips.
I half-smile and roll my eyes upward in the way that makes her squeal with delight. (I swear she thinks I'm her little baby-doll). I remove the cigarette from my mouth with my pointer and middle finger.
"Something is missing" she inquires.
She slips her hands under my shirt and peels it off, knocking my shades slightly askew. "You look free" she expresses as she straightens the sunglasses.
We run to the Hallway, out of my room and into the Kitchen. It's our favorite photospot. I'm giving off looks that span from innocence to your worse nightmare.
Without even thinking I make tiger claws and playfully shout "RAWWWRR." I know we're disturbing my sister and her friends who are in the next room, but I don't care.
Barbie is happy, because I am and this is what living feels like. It's too much to think about, I know I need her. "Thank you" I whisper and she hugs me and for once in the world I feel important.