Khushboo - Chapter Three
Really, I'm used to Yasmin's antics: her wild partying, the drinking, the drugs (even though I tell her not to, and she only listens to me sometimes like the loveable, but sometimes immature friend she is), the depression, the anger issues.
Well, who am I kidding?
Yasmin's immature all the time. We all know that.
But I love her through thick and thin always, and even though sometimes she needs a little bit of help finding herself out of the darkness, I'm always there. Because that's what best friends do.
Especially best friends that spawned over the internet and prompt each other to move in together after two years.
So I wasn't surprised when she freaked out the next morning after she got super wasted with her new friend(s?). She usually doesn't care about much- just her friends and video games really, but I think the real reason she was so freaked out?
'Cause she went full-fledged lesbian on that Asian girl and it scared her because she didn't know what the fuck she was doing. She doesn't really think about her actions, hell, she's said several times that she doesn't think before she speaks, but getting wasted with people she didn't know too well scared her.
I kept that in mind about my best friend as the most fatal week of my life ensued.
"Holy shit, she's so pretty!" Blake's voice overly loud voice blasted from the speakers of the laptop I had used to record Yasmin and her two new friends that she had made last night.
I watched, unsure of how to react, while Blake looked excited like she was watching Iron Man 3, Yasmin looked like she was going to pass out of embarrassment, and Jordan watching nonchalantly, like she had somewhere else to be at the moment.
"I told you she was!" Yasmin yelled back at Blake. Her head popped into the camera range as she walked in from the front door, her hand in Jordan's. "She never believes me, though!"
"C-can I hug you?" Blake asked hesitantly on the video, stepping up to me innocently.
I shrugged, uncertain as to what to say, and she let out a gleeful yelp as she leaned in and wrapped me in the tightest bear hug I'd ever endured in my entire life.
"Um, I'm gonna make out with this hot Asian girl, so everyone else can go fuck themselves," Yasmin said matter-of-factly, staring at me and Blake.
"Already getting there," Jordan replied, smirking at Yasmin.
"You're perfect," Yasmin cooed almost lovingly at Jordan. She leaned in and pecked her on the cheek and Jordan grabbed Yasmin by the shirt aggressively and fell down onto the couch, lost in their own little world.
"Well, that's a little disturbing," I commented, unable to tear my eyes away as lips were bitten and bra straps were loudly snapped.
All the meanwhile, Blake was dancing around drunkenly, twirling around in circles and leaping like a clumsy gazelle. She wasn't looking where she was going, and I winced as the hem of her shirt caught on the front doorknob and ripped it halfway off, her face carefree as her midriff was exposed.
Personally, I wasn't quite sure what do. I was swamped with school and work, especially today, since the memory of dissecting testicles was ingrained in the front of my brain. I have to travel an hour or so every day to school, and it's tiring to go back and forth.
If I hadn't been so tired, I would have gone with Yasmin that night. After all, it's not like I don't like Linkin Park, it's the exact opposite. I didn't really care for them much until Yasmin when on this whole rant and even made a PowerPoint to convince me to like them.
Was she crazy? Yes.
But did I care? No way in hell.
She was my best friend; I didn't fucking have a care in the world!
"Hey, do you guys have an Xbox around here or something?" Blake suddenly cut in, staring at me and putting her hands on her hips prominently. "Not to toot my own horn or anything- but I'm pretty fucking good at Just Dance. Just saying," She said, and then started to laugh.
"Get it, just saying? Just like the name of the game; Just Dance? That was pretty-," She suddenly stopped talking and then calmly walked over to the window, opened it, and vomited suddenly and violently onto the concrete.
The sound of it splatting against the ground was enough for me to say "fuck it" and go to bed.
"It's underneath the T.V.!" Yasmin finally answered, a good minute after Blake had asked. She turned her attention back to Jordan, "You're not moving your hips enough." Yasmin growled at her.
"If I go any faster, my pants will fall off," Jordan replied, propping herself up against the couch.
"But, they're gonna come off anyway," Yasmin said, like it was obvious that they would.
"Oh yeah," She said thoughtfully. She shrugged her shoulders. "Alright. Grinding away, it is."
"Where the fuck is Ke$ha?!" Blake screeched at the top of her lungs.
I have a feeling I'm going to have a major headache in the morning. I thought to myself before walking over and shutting the laptop lid closed.
I raised my eyebrows after pressing the "STOP" button and shutting the lid closed, after showing the video to the three of them: Blake, Jordan, and Yasmin.
"I actually am good at Just Dance, though," Blake quietly cut in, since no one had talked for a literal two minutes, since everyone was too shocked to say anything about the video. Besides me and Blake of course, since I had seen it unfold already and Blake just wasn't really fazed by anything.
Actually, probably the one person that was actually shocked was Yasmin, since she was just sitting there with a sort of lost look on her face, like she didn't know who she was anymore.
"We…," She suddenly cut in, drawing everyone's attention to her quiet voice, "Jordan and I," She awkwardly cleared her throat, "We didn't have sex did we?" Her voice turned quiet on the word 'sex' and she stared off into space with her eyes wide.
"Um, no," I said quietly. I had to dig my fingernails into fist to keep from laughing. "You guys took off your pants,"
"Which sort of explains why you had on each other's bottoms?" Blake cut in, like she was being helpful.
"And then you guys kinda just fell asleep because you guys both said you were on your period…" I finished uneasily, still holding in the laughter.
Yasmin just swallowed, her eyes wide and staring at the carpet as if it had some answer to why in the hell she would have done such a thing, but Jordan was just sitting there, staring at Yasmin as if she wanted to ask, 'want to pick up where we left off?'
"That…would have been fucking nasty if you guys went ahead and did that shit," Blake said, her eyes widening in shock at the thought of it. "Not that lesbian stuff is nasty though, I don't have a problem with that. Just because of the bloo-,"
"STOP," Yasmin interrupted before Blake could finish her sentence. "After almost baby barfing today in my mouth at 10 in the morning, I don't really feel like talking about basically licking someone else's blood." She snapped.
"Okay, well, that's just grosser than dissecting testicles," I cut in, feeling a little sick to my stomach. I held up my hand to keep them from talking. "But still though, what we really need to know, is this,"
"What the hell happened last night?" Jordan suddenly suggested, saying the first thing since she'd sat down next to Yasmin, who had tried to edge away in fear of getting dry humped or something of the same effect.
"Er, yes," I said, a little surprised that she'd said anything. "And I know you guys don't remember much, so let's start with that- what do you remember from last night? Blake, you should go first, considering how you're the least…traumatized." I said.
"Well, I came from Indiana in my Jeep to go to the Linkin Park concert," She started off. "Just on a side-note though- I had originally planned to go with my friends, but they decided to be total shithats and chickened out on me for the last second.
"Anyways, I came for the concert and everything, and I made it to Santa Monica about half an hour before it started. Went to McDonald's - for the fries, don't fucking judge me," She said, staring hard at me and everyone else.
"And there, I saw Yasmin. And Jordan too, now that I think of it. Weren't you reading a Walking Dead comic or something?" She asked.
Jordan shrugged indifferently, but was there a flash of pink underneath those yellow-toned cheeks I saw?
"Yeah, I was reading 'em," She admitted, smiling a little sheepishly. "I was going to the concert too, because I heard that there…well, I just knew someone that was going to be there." She said, stumbling a little bit over her words.
I found it a little peculiar from the way she just started to stumble and slur her words awkwardly, but then I figured that it was probably either because she was trying to find someone to hook up with, or surprisingly, maybe she was trying to scope out some "significant other" and didn't want to admit it.
"Yeah, I came from Canada-," Jordan tried to continue, until she was interrupted by Blake.
"You came from Canada?" Blake screeched, interrupting Jordan. "I fucking hate Canada. Well, not really hate, it's just an inside joke. Even though it's cold as fuck…but I've got some relatives that own a hotel there and it's just a really long story so…keep going!" She said, offering a weak smile.
"Uh, yeah, came from Canada," Jordan started over. "I kind of travel with this dancing company thing and-,"
"Dancing company?!" Yasmin interrupted, looking completely interested in Jordan's story instead of gracelessly shying away from her, "So, does that you mean you know Drake or something? I don't care about Justin Bieber; he's an ass cracker, but still, back to the point: Drake?"
"Wait, wait, wait," Jordan said, putting up her hands and giving Yasmin an "are you fucking kidding me?" look.
"Because I'm from Canada - and you don't even know if I'm from Toronto - and I say that I dance, that automatically equates to that I possibly know Drake on a personal level?" She asked sarcastically. "Do you understand how stupid that sounds?"
"Oh, sorry!" Yasmin said drily. "Have any of you noticed that I really don't give a fuck? I literally don't even think before I speak, dude."
Jordan raised her eyebrows at Yasmin. "You just completely freaked out a literal 15 minutes ago, and you're saying that you don't give a fuck about anything?"
"I HAVE OPHIDIOPHOBIA," She yelled back. "I almost physically shat my fucking pants when I saw that snake in my house!"
Jordan merely smiled back and said coolly, "Well then, I guess you should take off those pants and return them to their rightful owner."
I watched, my uncertainty growing since I had watched the drama between the two of them start from the beginning, while Blake simply kept her eyes trained on the two of them while simultaneously bending over to take out her last Monster from her bag.
"You mean, you want me to take the pants off?" Yasmin echoed, staring hard at Jordan. "So you mean, you want me to fucking strip in front of you so you can get some lady wood?" She narrowed her eyes.
"Maybe, maybe not," Jordan replied simply. "What does it matter to you? We're all girls, here."
"Yeah, so?" She answered back immediately, obviously flustered. "Not of all us want to fuck each other," She said, her voice getting increasingly louder.
"I've seen girls' tidbits already, what the hell is the motherfucking matter if I see them again?" Jordan replied matter-of-factly.
"Yeah, well, I don't go ejaculating Dr. Pepper all over the place and saying, 'Well, everyone's had Dr. Pepper before, so what's the "motherfucking matter"!" Yasmin yelled, her cheeks blushing red, making her skin turn an orange-ish brown.
Blake snorted, sending the Monster flying out her nose and spraying over the couch. "Oh my fucking breast-fed Jesus!" She cried, holding her hand to her nose. "It feels like someone threw anthrax up my fucking nose!"
I covered my mouth to keep from laughing out loud as their unnecessary drama continued.
"What the hell do you mean 'ejaculating Dr. Pepper'?" Jordan cried. "That doesn't even make sense!"
"Fine then, I'll take off the fucking pants for shit's sake!" Yasmin yelled at the top of her lungs, her neck veins nearly popping out of her skin.
She yanked down the pants and threw them against the floor so that they landed in a crumpled, green camo heap.
"I didn't want to take them off because I don't have underwear on!" She screamed in embarrassment and then fled away from the living room into her room.
I watched, bug-eyed as she ran away and then back to Blake, who just looked unsure of what to say.
"Whatever," Jordan said, rolling her eyes. "Can I use your shower or what? At first, it was pun intended, but now I actually do feel sticky."
"Yup, I think my Monster-drenched bag would explain that," Blake said uneasily, eyeing the her bag that she was holding up in the air that was dripping onto the floor.
"I…," I was at a loss for words. "Um…who wants pancakes, huh?" I said cheerfully, trying to keep everything together.
"How about Blake, here?" Blake said, holding her index finger up. She turned and jerked her thumb in Jordan's direction. "And while Lady Fingers here is taking a shower to wash the whore off of herself, I think I'll be playing some more Just Dance." She said, springing up from the couch.
I looked to Jordan, somewhat expecting her to feel insulted or something, but she didn't do anything but say, "Eh, she's right- I am what I am." She said, and winked right at me.
O…kay. I said uneasily in my mind. I gave her a weak smile and then started randomly opening and slamming counters, making it seem like I was doing busy work so Jordan would leave me alone. She left and went down the hallway to the bathroom.
It was a little weird for a stranger to feel completely familiar in your house and even comfortable enough to use your bathroom, even though they just met you. Actually, the more and more I looked at Jordan's face, the more I started to get this weird déjà vu feeling about her, like I had seen her before.
At first, I was a little worried for Yasmin's sake, considering the fact how badly she freaked out about everything, but then again, I didn't blame her. I probably would have been a little bewildered, also. But now, the more and more the situation unraveled, it all just seemed humorous and peculiar. In a way, I almost felt a little sad that I hadn't witnessed it all.
"I hope none of you drove last night," I muttered aloud, mixing the pancake mix in a bowl, not really directing what I said to anyone in particular.
"For some odd reason," Blake said, thrusting her hand out to scroll down the screen on the T.V., "I feel like a total hipster today. And it's bugging/pissing me off. Yasmin's not a hipster or anything, is she?" She asked, pausing to give me a questioning look.
I shrugged momentarily. "Along the average definition of 'hipster', I wouldn't think so," I said, laughing a little bit. "Actually, she used to say that she was dork before everyone though it was cool."
"Yeah," Blake answered before a Ke$ha song burst out of the speakers. "Sounds like something a 90's baby would say."
I opened the drawer and pulled out a spatula, since I had already poured the mix into the pan. Just as I was grabbing the bowl off the opposite counter, a loud knocking sound that literally jolted the apartment - and me, causing the bowl to fly out of my hands and splat against the floor - suddenly.
"Oh, son of a…," I said, putting my hands to my head in frustration, from dropping the bowl and trying to think of a word to finish my sentence. "Fuck!" I finally settled on.
"Police!" Yelled a voice from the opposite side of the door. "Open up this door!"
My panicked eyes flew to Blake's, who for once, actually seemed worried and not completely blasé about everything.
"Hey, I'm suing you guys!" Jordan's voice wafted out from the hallway. "A shampoo bottle fell on my head. I might have a concussion or some other injury that'll get me some money."
"Oh shit." I gasped.