I awoke to an intense pain. I felt as though someone was using me as a punching bag.
Damn it. The stupid neighbor girl and her drunk mother again. I could feel the anger and betrayal radiating through my body. I felt woozy and out-of-it. Drunk. Of course she is. I buried my head in my pillow. Just leave me alone. Leave me alone.
"Leave me alone Mommy!" I cried. Why did Mommy do this? I must be doing something wrong again. Mommy was always mad at me. Never Lucy, the older more responsible daughter. I had to be more like her.
" Shut up!" Mommy cried. "It's your fault John left me! He never wanted kids and neither do I! At least, not a kid like you!"
She pulled back her hand for another blow and-
I was back. Thank God! I could still feel their emotions, but at least I wasn't living through them. That happened every night since I moved here at the beginning of summer, almost two months ago. God, that girl must go through hell.
After laying in bed for about an hour, staring at white, blank ceiling tinted blue from the moonlight, I finally acccepted that I wouldn't be falling back asleep. I threw my legs over the side of the bed and slowly got to my feet. I grabbed a t-shirt and a pair of jeans from the end of my bed and left my room.
I followed the baby blue hallway until I reached the bathroom at the end; I stopped and jumped as I saw something glinting out of the corner of my eye. I looked closely and saw a mirror hanging from the wall. Instead of looking away as I normally did; I looked at my reflection and saw myself as others did. A skinny, dark haired girl with long wavy hair, tattoos, and many piercings. And my eyes. They looked empty.
My gaze dropped down, down till it reached my neck. A long red gash, that still hadn't healed over, two months later. I could feel my eyes glazing over and I tipped my head back, blinking repeatedly.
" It's not your fault, you know." came a voice from beside me. My head whipped sideways and I saw Marcie, my foster mother, standing just outside of her doorway. " I can tell you blame yourself, but it's really not your fault. "
I could feel the salty liquid begin to drip slowly down my cheek. Damn this woman! How could one silly, delusional, blond bimbo make me feel this much? My pain immediately transformed into something deeper, darker. A feeling that flowed through me easily, like and old friend. Yes, I knew these feeling very well. Anger and abandonment. Why let this woman steal part of my heart when I knew she would just tear it up later, carelessly like a piece of scrap paper? It's what everyone else did.
"You don't know anything about me. " I hissed and flew into the bathroom quickly, so I didn't have to see the look on Marcie's face.