After the very brutal day of school I had Blake and I were on my
way to my doctor's appointment. "How late are you?" He asked me
"I'm not telling you that!" I said "Come on you're having me go
to a doctor's appointment!" He said and the song A Little Bit
Stronger by Sara Evans came on so I turned the radio up and put
up a finger and started singing along. He was laughing at me but
didn't say anything, when it ended I finally answered him "Two
weeks. I'm normally only three days late at the max." I said and
he nodded "to much info." He said and I laughed at him "You're
the best. You know that right?" I asked him and I saw his famous
million dollar smile that I love so much and then his dimples.
"Yeah I know that." He said and I laughed at him on that one.
We pulled into the doctor's office and I felt a sudden feeling of
being at the doctor's and hospital so many times for Allie that I
felt a lump in my throat. I walked up to the nurse and she handed
me a paper to fill out and afterwards I handed it back to her and
sat next to Blake. "You'll be fine." He said and I nodded, he
knows I hate doctor's due to what we found out about Allie and
how because of that it has changed my life forever and this will
do the same thing with what the doctor will tell me.
"Miss Summerland, you are indeed pregnant. I would say five weeks
along." She said and I nodded she went into details about what
needs to happen and I nodded. Blake hugged me as we walked out.
Little did I know that we wouldn't be just friends for long, he
was my best friend I couldn't even ask Hope to come to this with
me yet I asked Blake who is a guy. "Lexie I'm here for you." He
said "I'm pregnant." I whispered I don't know who that was for
but I felt like I needed to say it. "I know Lexie." He said and I
hugged him "I can't believe this." I said and he nodded he leaned
in and hugged me to calm me down. "This baby might be just what
my family needs." I finally said as we were on the highway home.
"I know Lexie. You will be fine." He said "Or on the other hand
it could break the family worse." I said "No it won't Lexi." He
said "How can you be so sure?" I asked him "Because I have
confidence in you, I believe in you, and I'm in love with you."
He said and I looked at him and he blushed I guess he meant to
kept that last part in his mind. "You're in love with me?"I asked
and he nodded "Since when?" I asked feeling the sudden change.
"Since I first met you." He said and I smiled "I'm in love with
you too. Since the first day of sixth grade." I said and he
smiled at me, we were at my house now.
I hugged him good-bye and walked in, my mom was making dinner and
my dad was reading his newspaper. "Can you talk?" I asked them
two and they nodded, she sat down at the table and he placed his
newspaper down. "What's up sweetie?" Daddy asked me, and I took a
deep breath and heard a voice that sounded just like Allie's in
my head say "You can do it sissy." And I slowly began "You
remember Kyle right?" I asked them and they nodded. "Well he
raped me five weeks ago, and I'm pregnant." I said and my mom's
mouth dropped open and my dad had a blank expression on his face.
"What are you going to do?" Daddy asked me "Keep the baby if I
can." I said and daddy looked at momma who looked at me "Yes you
can." Daddy said and I smiled. "Honestly Lexi, this might be what
we all need. I know we're supposed to mourn for Allie. But this
will be a huge step toward healing. She will always be in our
heart and mind but we can't have her here physically and we need
to move on. With a new baby in the house we will do that." She
said and I nodded "I agree with her. A new baby will bring new
life into the house, now it's not going to replace Allie by any
means but it will fill the hole that she left and it's a new life
that we can spoil all we want and I can get away with it." I
laughed at that.
"Lexie can I come in?" Momma asked me it was after dinner and our
nightly walk. I was in my room studying for a test that I had
tomorrow. "Yes ma'am." I said pushing my books to my floor and
sitting up. "Why didn't you come to me? When you got raped." She
said "Because it was right after Allie's death and I knew you
were more focus on Allie than any of us so I didn't want to
bother you." I said "Lexie, I will always have time for you kids.
Especially something that tragic that happened to you." She said
and I only nodded at her. She hugged me and decided she was tired
so she went to bed, I just sat there focusing on everything that
has happened and grabbed my phone. It was getting chilly out but
I didn't feel like finding my jacket but I made the way that I
knew too well to Blake's house. His mom was on the porch and
nodded up to his room and I smiled at her.
Blake opened the door and smiled "I saw you coming, I was looking
out my window day dreaming and then I saw you walking up." He
said and I got close enough to him where I could smell that he
has been eating hot fries, his weakness. I looked up and I kissed
his lips. He didn't pull away, instead he pulled me closer to him
wrapping his arms around my waist as I wrapped my arms around his
neck. We finally pulled away and his green eyes sparkled "Wow."
He said and I smiled at him "I know." I said and sat down on his
bed. "So we're crossing the very thin but important line of
friendship?" He said "Yeah." I said "Friends that go farther
never last." He said "We can prove them wrong." I said and then
looked down at my belly "But I'm carrying someone's kid and it's
not yours." I said "I will tell everyone it is. I love you Lexie,
I don't want the baby to grow up fatherless." He said and I
nodded at him I knew he meant well so I didn't say anything about
it. "We're doing this." He said and I nodded at him and then he
smiled at me. "Walk you home?" He asked and I nodded but I
shivered because I was finally cold, so he gave me his hoodie and
I put it on.
"You two finally gave into faith?" His mom asked him and he shot
her a look but I found my way to his hand and smiled. "You're
pregnant. You have that glow." She said I figured she would have
asked it but I figured out wrong. "Yes ma'am." I said "It isn't
Kyle's." She said "No ma'am. I was raped." I said "I know. I can
tell." She said and I smiled "I'm walking her home." Blake said
and she nodded and went back to what she was doing. "The school
will find out soon enough." Blake said and I only nodded, I
wasn't sure what he was talking about but honestly I wasn't sure
if I cared at that moment. I hugged him good-bye and walked into
the house without giving him his hoodie back, it was mine now.
Allie, are you proud of me? I finally admitted my feelings for
him. Something you wanted me to do for oh so long. I thought to
myself as I curled up in my bed ready to fall asleep and drift
off to my dreamland. I remember so many times Allie telling me to
tell Blake how I feel. That I shouldn't be a chicken but instead
I should just do it. I should trust Allie because she knew what
she was talking about. I imagined Allie and I sitting up in my
bed probably or laying in her where we were on our sides and us
talking about the new baby in the life and everything. I knew
that this weekend Allie's things will be moved to the attic so I
could have room for the baby stuff that I needed. It was going to
be hard going through all of Allie's stuff but we had to do it. I
did pack all of Allie's stuffed animals and put it in my closet.
But everything else will be packed up and in the attic, her
clothes by the time she was dying were too small for me and I was
a size zero and XS and now I know I'm going to gain weight so I
was worried about that.