The month of January for me was really brutal. School was tough,
they were prepping us for the SATS which will be in March. My
fellow classmates are being little pain in my butts, always
teasing me, always picking on me, making fat jokes to me, calling
me a slut, a hoe, and a whore. School work was only getting
tougher on me and it was hard to maintain my A average but I was
doing that I didn't know how but I was. Then at home everybody
was still adjusting to Blake living with us, with me being
married, and it just brings back more memories of Allie, so when
we thought my mom was normal again she crumbled under our eyes.
She was a wreck, we had to clean the house and cook dinner
because she just couldn't bring herself to do it.
Then with me being pregnant it is worse. I'm more emotional, my
mood swings are really kicking in. I feel so huge, my ankle are
swollen, I'm having leg cramps. I hate the feeling of being fat,
but I'm having more and more craving so I stuff my face when I'm
at home so that just makes things worse for me. "Lexie, it's your
turn to cook." Callie said "Alright." I said but the tone was one
of the worse ones, I bit her head off and she almost started
crying. "Sorry Callie, mood swings." I said "Oh My God. I'm not
getting pregnant." She said when she walked out and daddy laughed
"good job." He said and I smiled and walked to the kitchen, I was
in the mood for curly fries and chili cheese dogs. So when I got
done with making dinner when we all ate but momma they went on
their normal walk. Blake went to work, he decided when he moved
in to give up his sports and to get a job. But I told him he is
doing Foot Ball his senior year, he needs a scholarship to Brown.
I'm probably going to do cheerleading so I can get one not only
by my grades. I walked into my parent's room with a plate and
handed it to her. I watched her eat half of it and then she
curled back up in bed. "Momma, it's okay. Everything will be
alright." I said "Oh Lexie, I hope you never go through this."
She said and I nodded and I hugged her hoping things will be okay
because I'm not even sure anymore.
February was even tougher for all of us. School was kicking it
into high gear, piling school work on us, plus cramming in SATS
sessions, we had a ton of home work every night and even more on
the weekends. The good part about us being crammed with so much
school work everybody doesn't have that much time to make my life
like crap. It was lunch time on the 19th so I was six months
pregnant now and I'm not ashamed to show off my belly. Hope
handed me a bag of chip and I slowly started eating it. "Three
months to go." She said and I smiled she was so excited for
Starry's and Stormy's arrival. "I know, trust me I'm counting it
down." I said and Blake nodded until his friends called him "I'll
see ya in English Three." He said to us and walked off. English
three is our last class for the day and we all have that class.
"So?" She asked and I knew what she was talking about "God no." I
said "It's safe." She said "Eh no." I said and she laughed at me.
"After they are?" She asked me and I looked away "uh-oh!" She
said and I slapped her and we busted out laughing.
I made it home to see Aunt Dana cleaning the house up. Today we
were all going to pitch together and get it spotless. "Afternoon
Lexie. How are the girls?" she asked walking over and rubbing my
belly. "They are good, healthy, growing at the right pace. Three
more months." I said and she smiled "I remember those days." She
said and I smiled "How is she?" I asked "Not so good. Her
Birthday is March 16th, so she is going out with your daddy that
night and then me on the 18th since it's a Friday." She said and
I smiled at her. "When are your SATS?" She asked me "Her
birthday. I'm studying all I can, but then I have to read up on
my pregnancy and then about what to expect."
Alright so I woke up today and smiled at myself. Sure in two days
I will be seven months pregnant but today is my momma's birthday.
She is thirty-three today so it's a big day for her. Callie,
Blake, Ryan, daddy, and I went shopping last Friday when she
didn't feel like going on our nightly walk so we got her two
gifts one from daddy which she will get tonight and one from us
kids. Ryan loves having Blake around because now he isn't the
only boy in the house expect for daddy. Momma was up when Blake
and I walked down and she smiled at us "Happy Birthday momma." I
said hugging her Blake was told to call her mom. "Happy Birthday
mom." He said and she smiled "thank you." She said and then added
in "Callie is sick today so she isn't going to school." Momma
said and I looked at her "Alright, she's skipping school. You
have to." She said and I smiled "what are the plans?" I asked
"Shopping early this morning, visiting your grandma with having
lunch, then watching a movie, and then we'll be home." She said
and I smiled "Have fun." I said and she smiled "Good luck both of
you." She said and I smiled "thanks." We said and left so we
wouldn't be late.
It took all morning but the whole 11th grade was finally done
with their SATS so we were all ushered into the gym to be
rewarded with the rest of the day being free. "How did you think
you did?" Hope asked me "good, I hope I got my names right." I
said and she laughed "Did you do Lexie or Alexis?" She asked me
"Alexis. Psst, I'm not going to get my name wrong for doing my
nickname." I said and she laughed Blake made his way over after
he finished the game of basketball. "Having fun?" He asked me
"Sure am." I said and he laughed "A good luck kiss?" He asked and
I kissed his cheek as he left me.
I remember so clearly right now my mom's last birthday. Allie was
going through chemo but it hasn't taken the toll on her body yet.
But we skipped school that day and made it my mom's best birthday
yet. We took her to the spa, they gave her whatever she wanted,
we went out to eat with our grandma, and then went shopping
instead of seeing a movie. We were all laughing and Allie looked
almost healthy until she threw up on the way home in a bucket.
The next day though chemo really took it toll on her, she woke up
to find a chunk of blond hair on the bed and I held her tight as
she cried and so did momma when I had to go to school.
"Lex?" Hope asked me and I realized she was still talking to me.
"Oh sorry, lost in thoughts." I said "About Allie? And today
being your mom's birthday?" She asked and I nodded "It's okay
Lexie." She said and I smiled at her "I know Hope." I said and
she smiled at me and I looked at Blake who was throwing the ball
into the basket and I smiled at that. "Daddy is taking momma out
tonight." I said and she smiled at me "I hope she has fun." He
said "I hope so too." I said and she smiled at me and the bell
that let us know that school was finally over rang and we all
went our separate ways.
Sure enough momma got all dressed up and ended up looking
beautiful for her date night with daddy. Nobody was brave enough
to bring up Allie. When she got home though she met me on the
swing porch and smiled. "Remember last year? How much fun us
three had?" She asked me and I smiled "Yeah. Allie was so
beautiful that day, so were you." I said and she smiled at me
"Good to know then huh?" She asked and I smiled at her. "How do
you think you did?" She asked me "I'm hoping good." I said "My
straight A daughter since third grade? You probably did do
great." She said and I smiled "thanks mom." I said "No thank
you." I said and of course on the 19th she was back to the new
her we were all so sure her birthday made her happy again but it