Solid as a Rock

I’m supposed to be solid as a rock,

But in reality,

I am sand stone.

Solid when put together,

But find my weak spot and I’ll crumble.

Once I start to crumble it’s hard to keep me together.

From there I begin to whither and deteriorate,

Once started, I can’t stop,

I wish I could be the solid rock everyone sees.

In my room I cry,

In my room I hurt,

In my room I cut.

My head hurts,

My heart hurts,

My hands hurt.

Sometimes I hurt so much I can’t feel anything,

I can no longer cry,

I can no longer bleed.

Everything is just numb,

Until reality comes back and I feel,

Then it all hurts at once.

I want to run away,

I want to leave all this,

I never want to come back.

Unfortunately everywhere I go it’ll be the same,

No matter what I’m going to hurt,

I want to be as solid as a rock.

No feelings,

No hurt,

Just solid.