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..::a love story:..::

Poem By: nuttyz
Young Adult


umm..i dont really know what to say about this. This is a poem i wrote after having a nightmare kindda.
So i thought of sharing it with you guys. And also, i wasnt sure about a title for this one...hehe

hope you enjoy the read^_^ View table of contents...

 

Submitted: Sep 25, 2008    Reads: 100    Comments: 16    Likes: 6   


She saw him
Appearing through thick darkness
Wearing all white
White t-shirt, and white jeans
And shoes too, white
His face glowing


*****


The hooded creature appears
Laughing evilly
He joins the creature
God knows why
Together, they laughed at her
At her bloody, limp body


*****


She cries harder
Tears stinging her face
She tries to scream out for him
For him to take her
To a safer place...
Away from all the evil creatures


*****


Along with the creature, he laughs
The creature looking more evil than never
He vanished...all of a sudden
Blood, forming a pool where he stood
The only door showing light closes
Leaving me alone in the darkness, with evilness


*****

Then, there he stood
In the middle of a cold cemetery
His chest all bloody
She discerned his pain
He is in a never ending agony
Tears streaming down his cheek


*****


She stood there, still
Dumbstruck; not sure what to do
He was apologizing
For what he did to her..
And was sorry for not taking her...
And for his family and friends too....


*****


She stood so silent
She couldn't bear to see him cry
She ran to him, and whispered
'Dont ever regret what did...
Or even what you do...
Just be proud of what you did and do...
And for who you are....okei?'


*****


He pushed her away
Ashamed to take her care
'No!...just leave me alone and let me be..
I shall be alone forever...
I do not deserve you...or your care..'
He cries...and cries


*****


She proceeds, not listening to him
Forgetting the insults
She comforts him
And there he was, in her arms
Looking so broken
And so limp and hurt...


*****


She hugs him, and cries
Stops when she realizes
How cold he has become
SHe touched his cold face, and whispered
'You're so selfish...you know..
You left me alone to suffer..'


*****


He died, in her arms
With a gorgeous smile on his face
A smile which told her a lot
To be happy...
And never shed a tear on him...


************


6

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Comments:

ooohh my goood this is sooo nice!! its dark in the beginning and then it starts getting brighter and more filled with love, and even when he dies [omg the last stanza is my absolute favourite! its written so well and the emotions....aaaahh!]its still ends kind of on a happy note cos they re both happy with eachother, and both recieved forgivness.


and *drumroll* THE PICTURE!! *gasp* i looovve anime they're always moore full of emotion, prettier and touch yuor heart more, and this pic is PERFECT for the poem, great job on finding it =]


to conclude, nadh, this ....was....so.....AMAZING! i really love it *hug*
great job ^^

mwa xxxxxxxxxxxxx
tc big sis =]

Posted: Sep 25, 2008

Author Comment:

Wowsy!!!! ME is the very muchly glad that you LOVED it!!!!XD*big grin*
I wasnt expecting it to be that good!!:S Anyways my sweet lil sis liked it!!...me happy!!!!^_______^
*huggiieee* mwahz!...and take care too lil sissy:-)

Oh mighty Zog! that was amazing! that was, i cant find the words for it, i am speechless! well not really. every line is beautiful in a different way, and it feels so heartfelt and sincier. a perfict comp platter of toutching love, a riviting story and delicious EVIL! with mashed potatos on the side, i like potatos.
this was great, simply amazing, bravo!

Posted: Sep 25, 2008

Author Comment:

*waaahh* I'm so glad you liked it!!
I like potatoes too!XD...haha....amazing that you saw my hidden mashed potatoes!!:P

Thanks a bunchy for the comment!^_^

i cant tear my eyes away from that picture and tha last stanzaa.....
*drools*
*stares*




*still staring*





*staring*



*drools a bit more*



*snaps out of it*

*satisfied sigh* aaah its ssooo beautiful! :D:D
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Posted: Sep 26, 2008

Author Comment:

heeheeehheee!!!:Dxxxx
Me is the very muchly happy that u looove itz!!!

Thanks a lot lil sis!XD
Keep on coming back again and again!!:P

Take care^^

It was Awesome. The enunciated imagery was just too good. Nice picture BTW. VERY touching; very sad... The last stanza was like driving the dagger out of a heart :p

He died, in her arms
With a gorgeous smile on his face
A smile which told her a lot
To be happy...
And never shed a tear on him...

Posted: Sep 26, 2008

Author Comment:

hehe...I'm really glad you liked it!! ^_^
Thanks for taking time to read and comment!:D

I love this poem it is soooo good!!! i can never wirte anyhting this good!
you can read mine and decide if it's good if you want to.

I REALLY LOVE YOUR POEM!!! CAN'T WAIT TO READ MORE OF YOUR WORK!!!

Posted: Sep 26, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks soo much!!!!
I'm really happy and glad that you liked it!
Your comments are really encouraging!^_^

wow i did hav some tears fall down keep up the work!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted: Sep 26, 2008

Author Comment:

woa!!!!O_O
Thanks soooooo much!!!^^

You made a great poem out of a confusing dream. I really liked it.

Posted: Sep 27, 2008

Author Comment:

hehe...thanks Alek!

I liked it the second time I read it! Haha just a little confusing on my part but all the while its an amazing peice!

And can you tell me how to get a picture on the page? I have tried to but I guess i'm not doing it right?

Loved your picture!

Great work!

Posted: Sep 27, 2008

Author Comment:

hehe!!
Thanks!
At least you understood it the second time.:P

Yeah, to put a picture, I also have to try and see again:P...coz i keep on forgetting...lol

I'll post it on your page soon!

gnaw.
*Get's all teary*
that was cute )=
keep it up.
your really good.


Posted: Sep 27, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks!^^

really cool. keep it up! i really find this beautiful :)

Posted: Sep 28, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks a lot!:-)

this....a dream??? kinda detaild, thats cool that means u have a good memorie and u know how to express it in a very captive way. I liked it...

Posted: Sep 28, 2008

Author Comment:

Glad you liked it!:-)

Wonderful nutty. But so tragic.:(
it was a little confusing in between but i soon caught upto it.:)

Posted: Sep 29, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks slender smile. :-)
And i'm happy to hear that you understood it!^_^

Oooh. How sad... :( It was so beautiful, and there was so much emotion..My eyes watered when I read this. Amazing work. :]

Posted: Sep 30, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks a lot for reading and commenting, ashen!:-)

awwww I loved it!

Posted: Nov 11, 2008

Author Comment:

wheeeee!!
Thanks a bunchy! Me glad you loved it!!XD

Enjoyable. Quite enjoyable. I won't lie it forced me to analyze my own life perhaps to a degree that I dont want, but in truth i needed it. Thank you.....

Posted: Nov 11, 2008

Author Comment:

hehe...I'm really glad you liked it!
Thanks for reading and commenting^^

aaa had to come and read it again!!
its soo beautiful and brilliant!!=D=D
i absolutely LOVE it ^^
xxxxxxxx

Posted: Nov 12, 2008

Author Comment:

heheh!!!XD
Come back again!:P...me is very muchly happy!:D



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Tags

Love, Poetry, Death, Life, Poem, Romance, Pain, Fantasy, Hope, Sad, Sex, Hate, God, Horror, War, Humor, Hurt, Sadness, Loss, Dark, Fiction, Depression, Heart, Family, Friendship.

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