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LESS THAN A SECOND...

Poem By: Pratibha
Young Adult


Day before yesterday, I lost my son, kriish, for a complete 5 minutes outside Dufferin Mall in Toronto, Canada. There was a huge rush outside WALMART and I got carried away by the Feng Shui display outside WAL-MART...It was 100% my mistake and carelessness that I did not notice that he is not there with me.When I looked down and did not find him, i called out his name, he did not respond...Then, i knew what i have done...I could have killed myself if something would have happened to the poor kid because of my selfishness...I CAN NEVER NEVER FORGIVE MYSELF FOR WHAT I DID...this is my plea to all those wonderful mothers out there, not to leave their kids hands at any cost...learn from my mistake...learn from my experience...Anything could have happened..Any Psycho could have picked him up...Kriish would have been kidnapped forever...I would have lost him forever...he would have suffered at the hands of a pedophiliac...What was the guarantee that the worst would not have happened !! And all this because of ME...I was responsible for this...I was...Being a Mother is not a child's play...GOD has created Mothers to protect tiny creatures from all harm...MAY GOD FORGIVE ME FOR THIS CRIME...this was CRIME and I want to share this experience with all of you so that no kid should ever get lost...Please help a lost kid...Don't take the kid away from that spot...Just pick up and stand there at "THE SAME SPOT"...his parents will come there...They will be searching there only...Encourage him to call out your name...PLEASE DO NOT TURN YOUR BACK AND GO AWAY...PLEASE HELP A LOST CHILD...PLEASE HELP HIM FIND HIS MAMA AND PAPA...HE DOESNOT DESERVE TO SUFFER...HE NEEDS US...

HONESTLY I DON'T BLAME ANYBODY THERE IN THE MALL....WHY SHOULD ANYONE ELSE be RESPONSIBLE FOR MY CARELESSNESS?? View table of contents...

 

Submitted: May 5, 2008    Reads: 376    Comments: 69    Likes: 21   


One second:
One second...
That’s all...
I am finished...
My world is gone...
My son is lost...
My life is gone...
He was here, was here with me...
Tiny warm fingers in my hands...
Suddenly, realisation dawned on me that...
He is gone...
No fingers in my hands...
His smiling face lost...
I lost him...Oh God! I lost him...
Lost him forever...
What if, he is kidnapped??
What if, he is ..........??
Could not think...Don’t want to think...Why should I think negative?
But...But ...But...now what?
Where is my son?
For that moment...Everything STOPPED...
Wind stopped blowing...Birds stopped chirping...
Bees stopped humming...Rain stopped pouring...
Life stopped...My heart stopped...My soul died...
I can’t hear...I can’t think...What’s happening??
Why am I sweating so much? What’s this gripping pain in my chest?
No, Never...I cannot let this happen to me...I have to stand up...
Ihave to get up and gather myself...My son needs me...My son is in trouble...
He is lost...He is searching for me...Yes, listen carefully, he is calling for me...
I have to search for him...I cannot afford to lose him...
Somebody please help...
Please help...please...please listen to this mom...
He is small, he is innocent, he is flawless, he is kriish, he is my son...
MY SON...Please, listen, he is MY SON...
My Kriish, my world, my universe, my life...
GOD take my life, punish me hard,
Punish me...I am responsible for this...
I am responsible, GOD...
I am...
I was careless; I forgot to hold his tiny hands tight...
I ignored his plea to go to toy shop...
He got bored and wandered off...
GOD please, please forgive me...
Please give kriish back...Just this one time...
Give him strength...Give him comfort...
“Kriish, Kriish, kriish....
Where are you, honey? Where are you sweetheart?
Come to mama...Come to me...Mama is half dead...
Mama is sorry...Mama is sorry to leave your hands...
Forgive me my son; forgive your mama for being selfish...
Please come out...Mama is calling you...
Ask for help, sonny, ask for help...Cry out “MAMA”...
I will hear you...I will help you...”
No sound, no noise, people walking past me...
Nobody is bothered...Nobody cared...
Nobody tried to search...
Nobody helped little kriish...
Nobody helped his mama...
What if it was their child? What if it was their loved one?
What if...??
Kriish, don’t worry, Mama will come...
Mama will find you...GOD is there with us...
You are GOD’s child...be strong my son...
GOD will help Mama find you...
Suddenly...I heard him...
I heard my son...I heard my kriish crying...
Crying out “Mama, Mama”...
“Mama, where are you?” “Mama, I am lost.”...
“Mmmm....aaaa....mmmm.....aaaa”... “Mama I am scared.”...
I ran towards the call...Towards kriish, towards my life...
Towards my love...Towards Light...Towards faith...
Towards GOD...towards confidence...
This is kriish’s cry...This has to be MY SON...
THIS IS MY SON...
There he is...
Standing terrified amidst a sea of people who are not bothered...
Standing alone with lots of tears rolling down his cheeks...
Crying out loudly...Crying out for help...
“Somebody help me find my Mama...”
Nobody picked him up to help...Nobody comforted him...
Nobody tried to make him stop crying...
GOD made me hear his innocence, his cry, his plea...
“It’s okay...Mama is here...Come to me...”
Tears did not stop and we hugged each other as if there was no tomorrow...
Sun came out bright and smiling...
Flowers kissed his soft cheeks...
Dew drops like tears rolled down his cheeks and I hugged him even tighter...
Mama loves you more than her life...
Mama is alive for you...for only YOU...
If you are gone...I am gone...I am dead...I will not live...
Don’t want to see anything else...Except YOU and ONLY YOU...
Forgive me GOD...YOU gave kriish in my lap and I took motherhood for granted...
GOD
...Please forgive me...
...Please give me the insight to do things right
...Give me the wisdom to think straight...
...Please give me the strength to be a strong and RESPONSIBLE MOM...
THANK YOU GOD...THANKS FOR GIVING MY KRIISH BACK to Me...
THANK YOU FOR LISTENING TO THIS MOM...
THANKS FOR MAKING ME REALISE THAT ONE SECOND IS ENOUGH TO CHANGE THE WORLD UPSIDE DOWN....


21

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Comments:

Kriish would be so proud and happy to learn of the love of his mother when he grows up and reads what you have written for him. But don't be too hard on yourself, you are a human too.

Posted: May 5, 2008

Author Comment:

i can't express how ashamed I am ....How could i leave his hands in such a huge Mall?? I just keep getting the nightmare.Your sweet comment did ease my guilt a bit...Thanks buddy

Pratibha, all the mum's I know (and there's quite a few) have at some point lost their child, they have wondered off in the shopping mall too. It doesn't make you a bad mum, it's obvious from reading this that you're a great mum! You have so much love for him, how could you possibly be anything else? We are human, we make mistakes, don't let the cost of this one be your self confidence in your ability to be a good mum. I'm sorry you had to experience that it must be have been your worst nightmare. You're really something special to post this, a lot of us wouldn't! :) ~ Nixie

Posted: May 5, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks Nic, Thanks for understanding...I am indeed ashamed and I really don't know what would have happened that day if i would not have found him and somebody would have picked him up and taken away....It's so sad that I just took him for granted...Thanks for being so kind in understanding what i went through. Sharing my agony with all of you makes me feel lighter.Imagine I could at least write it down, what about little kriish??

I hope Kriish gets to read this someday, and be able to see what was going on in your mind during that time, I think he will appreciate you more.It is nice of you to share those moments here with other mothers, it may help someone else out. But like I have already said, you are a wonderful mom, don't let these five minutes spoil the lifetime of wonder you have and you are able to give your son.

Posted: May 5, 2008

Author Comment:

Honestly Dev , I want him to read this when he grows up and forgive me for what i did....
THANK GOD i found him DEV...I don't want to think what would have happened if i would have never found him...

Pratibha, ultimately you're going to feel bad but as Nixie said you're only human. By the sounds of it, you are a great mum with lot's of love to give, you might not believe it but Kriish is lucky to have you. ~ Gypsy

Posted: May 5, 2008

Author Comment:

YES, Gypsy and Rose....I know buddies...I am not getting sleep since 3 days now till 6.00am in the morning....after writing this, i am feeling lighter and better...
I am glad to have a support system in all of u...
Thanks for understanding my agony....

Oh Sweetie, you are being way to hard on yourself. When my son was two he snuck under a clothes rack in a store and just disappeared. It was terrifying! I ran blind with my heart pounding, so I know the fear you felt. But, you love him very much and mistakes happen. Everything turned out good, so the mistake is unimportant. I have no doubt in the world that your little man is extremely lucky to have you. Nice job with the poem, but please give yourself a break. :)

Posted: May 5, 2008

Author Comment:

Yes, DF, u r right....should gve myself a break....I get tensed very easily since i am a typical type A personality and I lose myself easily while watching displays in MALLS.This sure was one huge lesson...Now,, i have to move on...I am glad I shared it with all of u
I can empahise what u went through when ur son snuck under clothes rack like they have in WINNERS Mall....Thank GOD that i got great friends....

Yep. All mom's face it. Losing their child is a parent's worst fear, the biggest nightmare of all. Like I mentioned on your page, I lost my 6 year old in WalMart. She was gone for thirty minutes. It was the longest thirty minutes of my life. The crazy thing was that I also had my 10 year old and my MOM with me!!! My mom kept telling me to calm down, and we searched for her together. We found her clear on the other side of WalMart, eating an apple from the produce stand.
The poem itself brings me back to that horrific thirty minutes. But it also makes me realize that we're only human. Things happen. You know that you truly love your son. You know that you'd do anything in the world for him. You know how far your love goes - it reaches past eternity. As long as you know these things, you're doing a great job as a mom. Oh, and my mom said the same happened to her when I was little. She couldn't find me in a clothing store. When they found me, I was asleep in a changing room!
MA

Posted: May 5, 2008

Author Comment:

30 minutes?? U would have been unconcious by then, I guess...It's so painful....it hurts....
U, too, were lost?? I am sure, ur MOM would have been able to calm u down...
I wish this should never happpen to anybody
Thanks MA, your comment made me feel better

what an amazing poem but please do not be so hard on yourself, i lost my son when he went out to play many years ago, it is that gut wrenching moment you realise they are not where they are supposed to be. my husband and i searched for ages and we ended up having to call the police. all my neighbours were out looking for him. i was useless i went to pieces all i could think of was my little boy lost. in the end he had gone to play at his friends house and hadnt told us. i can still remember the relief at seeing him, so please please please do not beat yourself up anymore. you are an amazing mum never forget that. snow x

Posted: May 5, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks Snow,thanks for those kind words...yes that gut wreching feeling when we don't find them where they were supposed to be and i was shocked...
if anything would have happened to him, i would have hanged myself, buddy.
He is a quiet boy and he got bored when i did not listen to him....

the love for your son shows greatly in this poem. he's lucky to have a mother who loves him so much. Things like this do happen, it's life, and we learn from our experiences. Such a great poem, so well composed, the story was well written. Good job!
Steph:)

Posted: May 5, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks Stephen...thanks for being there for me always....i need lots of true friends

Wow, okay so I don't have children, I'm not even married, but I can tell you from experience that everyone looses a child sometime. I lost my little cousin and he was only three, everyone in my family was there, it was nobody's fault. It just happened.

Obviously you are not a bad mother, you're probably a great one, judging by this poem. Just remember, everyone gets lost at least once. I get lost everytime I go to Walmart for Pete's sake and I'm not a child.

Great poem, it shows your love for your child. He is obviously a very precious person.
~Kaori

Posted: May 5, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks Kaori..thank you honey. I really appreciated ur presence. U get lost in Walmart?? How??
U know what kriish is not naughty at all and that day it was MY fault...i took him for granted and left his hands...I think this was a huge lesson for me

aww.... that's a very good poem, but a veryyyyyy sad one too... don't be too hard on urself.. my mom has lost me and my sister and brother a GAZZILLLION times! just because we wandered off or stayed were we were when they left to go somewhere... but, they've always found us and u should be happy u found ur son too and look on the bright side instead of the bad. You are indeed a great person and mother and ur children are very lucky (i sometimes say lucky or unlucky even though i don't beleive in luck... idk... im used to it...) to have such a great mother and they will burst into tears when they read this just like I and pretty much everyone did... also, is krishh the one ur holding in ur profile picture??? If yes, you can see right there that u love ur son and would never leave him on purpose... and GOD knows that, so he wouldn't be mad at u and punish u if u didn't find krishh...
Leapordheart ^-^/ Ana
P.S. my real name is Anastasiya, but I like Ana better... idk.. everyone says anastasiya is better but...

Posted: May 5, 2008

Author Comment:

Dear ANA,
thanks sweetheart. That was so so nice of u....it was indeed very very touchy comment.
Yes, honey it is kriish whom i am holding and the snap in this poem is also kriish on his 3rd birthday
he is not naughty at all . It was my fault and i will probably never be able to forgive myself

hi! pratibha. the good thing - ur son is back with u and that is what counts. the bad thing - nothing. please don't blame urself and try to forget it as a bad incident. ;-)

Posted: May 5, 2008

Author Comment:

yes bubbly , i don't know why this happened and what if??

But i guess it was a lesson for me

Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh!People are so cruel these days-- so soooo cruel! I love how you put in all those racing thoughts-- all of the paranoia. It made my heart race with suspense-- I was scared for Kriish! Poor little guy-- no one should be ignored like that-- and I'd just die too. I mean if my mom or/and dad were to die... I'd probably crumble into a million shards and perish. Moments like these really make you think of what you've lost-- they really make you understand how much of an imprint that person has made in your life.

I hope that you aren't being too harsh on yourself. Things like this happen-- and you can only learn from your mistakes. Build a bridge over that other bridge, you know:)?

Gorgeous poem Pratibha-- really I was glued to it from the start. Right away I knew there was something amiss-- and that caught my attention.

Lot's of special chocolate to you,

Ghiradelli Girl.

Posted: May 5, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks CHOCO...I am proud to have u as my friend in my life and that is why i asked u to write for me.
Thanks .....I know my poems are not exactly poems and I found this new word from Sykkelobot that it could be called as poem story....
It was the most difficult moment of my life, buddy. I thought of all those times when i did not listen to him and neglected him. His entire personality , his smile everything just drove me mad and crazy and i did not care who is thinking what....
I ran like mad and cried my heart out.

Big sis, I feel no doubt in you. You love your son more than anything in this world. Don't be too hard with yourself pratibha. It happens.^^

Just take it as a lesson. Now you are a BETTER mom.^^

Kriish has to be the luckiest boy to have you as a mother.^^

Posted: May 6, 2008

Author Comment:

i don't know Punishment if he is lucky because he was going to suffer because of my carelessness....I am indeed lucky and that 5 min taught me NEVER EVER TO take him for granted....
Thanks honey, ur words r as angelic as u r

Thankfully it was nothing worse. Children are so precious to all of us and what a sad reflection on society that we have terrified people so much with wild accusations that they are scared to help a child for fear of being branded. I am happy that you have both come out of it unscathed, though you will remember it a lot longer than your son.

Posted: May 6, 2008

Author Comment:

You are so right Irwin. In fact I am glad no body harmed or scared him He was shaking like a leaf...My heart went out to him...poor fellow had to go through this...
i am so scared of Paedophiliacs, ....

Prathibha my two older boys (many years ago!)aged about four and five were outside in our fenced in back yard playing (or so I thought) When I realised they were very quiet I went outside to check on them and they had vanished! So I can appreciate your sense of panic and feeling of guilt oh so well! Apparently they decided to go off on their own and walk down the road to see "Uncle Jimmy" who lived about a five minutes walk away. No harm done but could have been.(like you I shudder to think) Are we as mothers to chain our young to our side? Could I have known what was in my two sons minds on that day? Should I have been outside with them in the back yard. Unfortunately life isn't like that. There WILL be moments such as you experienced that we won't be prepared for. NO more guilt Prathibha - you are a wonderful, caring, loving mother.

Posted: May 6, 2008

Author Comment:

thanks ANNA. Yes you are right....I know i should not try to limit his movements always for my fear. But u know what , i let his hands out...he was not naughty at all....

I better be careful esp in Malls ...right?

I won't feel guilty buddy...i will not...i have such a wonderful family around me

this was sad but nice

Posted: May 6, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks for this honest comment

Stop calling Stephhlebreton Stephen, Stephen is a boys name, the girls'name is Stephanie!! Stephanie!! She is my friend. Is the gof that creates mothers the same god that created Hitler and cancer and aids? Then he is an asshole.

Posted: May 6, 2008

Author Comment:

thanks Eric...for showing me facts......May GOD forgive you for your ignorance.......and give you the sensitivity to behave properly with other's sentiments...
AND i will not address as Stephen anymore...i am sorry

Pratibha, you have no need to punish yourself the way you are, Kriish is one of the luckiest boys I know to have as devoted mother as you. There are plenty of children in the world who would give their right arm - and left, and both legs, to have a mother one tenth of you.

Kids are better escape artists than Houdini ever was and it takes split seconds, not even THAT long to slip out and be off. I can't say anymore than people above here have said in terms of ALL children do disappearing acts and put the fear of God into their parents, I've done it, my brother has, ALL my cousins have. It's natural, please don't put anymore thought into it, Kriish is safe he's happy he probably doesn't even remember it.

Love the writing, you always put so much passion and emotion into your work and that's what makes it so readable.



As an insignificant footnote, please ignore Eric's more than unconstructive comments which are nothing to do with this brillaint piece of writing.


Posted: May 6, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks JAK...GOD u r a darling....YOU ARE A DARLING....AND I MEAN IT FROM ALL MY HEART AND SOUL....

devi prasad
(not registered user)

dear pratibha,
GOD is the ONLY reason why bad things dont happen to us everytime we make a mistake.. that,s the way we learn .
do not feel so guilty for a mistake.. unless..of course, you keep on repeating the same. well, but writers do need a heavy dose of inspiration for their creative juices to keep flowing.
brilliant writing once again from a mature writer!!!!
nice!

Posted: May 6, 2008

Author Comment:

Dear Devi Bhai,
yes i should try my level best NOT to repeat this since Kriish was not being naughty at all. I was careless for sure and so I penned down this as a poem story so that i should never never repeat this again....

Such a beautiful comment coming from you made my day Bhai...U addressed me as "mature" writer ...u can't imagine how honored i feel though i know i am indeed far from being that....thanks a ton...

Hi Pratibha ^^smiles^^
I am SO sorry you had to go through that!
know that in life we all make mistakes,
but don't punish yourself, because in doing so you bring negative energy to yourself.
it's not a good thing to carry conflicting emotions.
You Love Krish with all your heart and by knowing only that you can disolve all negative karma.
*Peace*, *Love* and *Light* -again I am truly sorry that you experenced such a dramatic scare.
May God Bless you and Keep you safe Always :-)
~katie

Posted: May 6, 2008

Author Comment:

Dear Katie, I missed ur comments buddy. Thank GOD u came back...thanks ...yes i will try to get the negative thoughts out...surely....I will do as u said

I think that God was trying to teach you about the most important thing in your life, your son. I'm glad hes safe and I agree with Punishment that your a better mom and a better person!
May God Bless You,
Keepers' River

Posted: May 6, 2008

Author Comment:

Yes buddy, I know that's the reason GOD gave me this punishment....i really took him for granted. I am scared as to if he would have been lost...it would have been due to me...poor boy would have suffered ...
But I am glad that i have such wonderful people around me to cheer me up

Pratibha:

Well written. Great choice of theme. Most timely, for everyone, I'm sure. Gave it an "I Like It" vote.

Most sincere emotions expressed, by yourself, really put it over and make it something most compelling for everyone to read.

Happier trails,

Ed Bradley.

Posted: May 6, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks ED for being there for me ALWAYS...u were with me when no one was there. Thanks for everything
though this is hardly a poem...it's a poem cum short story....
I always need ur blessings and guidance and ur encouragement in all my endeavours.

That is terrifying! I'm glad that everything worked out ok. When something like that happens I think you immediately think of all the weirdoes out there, but honestly, most people are good and would try to help your little guy. Please don't be hard on yourself about this. It does happen to every mother, even the most careful and vigilant.

Posted: May 6, 2008

Author Comment:

I have to be really vigilant next time onwards....
I will tie him....hee ehee heee with my hands....

Hey that was such a sweet comment....i feel like talking to an icecream.....soft and sweet....

I refuse the idea that you are not a good mother! You are ! This happens , one second and children gone , but they back . This happened to me once and i tough my son not to leave me. About people , it's sad to say it , but how much cold is the country much cold are the people.
Don't take this blame !

Posted: May 6, 2008

Author Comment:

Honestly i am glad that nobody picked him up. I could hear his cry and follow that voice.
How old is ur Son? U r such a sweet mom. And i am glad to have u as my friend

hey Pratiba when i read this i cried and i don't cry. don't be hard on yourself. children often wander off and get lost. hey i get lost at walmart it's so big. it's obvious you are good mom, and when your son reads this he'll appreciate you more. this a great poem i loved it

ignore eric's ignorant comments.

ps don't be too hard and harsh on yourself

Posted: May 6, 2008

Author Comment:

thanks buddy. I wrote this one to always remind me that i should never take him for granted.

hey Pratiba when i read this i cried and i don't cry. don't be hard on yourself. children often wander off and get lost. hey i get lost at walmart it's so big. it's obvious you are good mom, and when your son reads this he'll appreciate you more. this a great poem i loved it

ignore eric's ignorant comments.

ps don't be too hard and harsh on yourself

Posted: May 6, 2008

Author Comment:

Dear Princess, Eric's comments did make me feel sad. I mean what is the meaning of writing rubbish..BUT who cares for his comments when i have wonderful friends like you.Right?
Next time, i will strap him with me....hee heeeee heeee...

you shouldn't be so hard on yourself. Your not the only parent that has lost their child. My dad has lost my sisters once. If you lose your child you should think where you last had them with you. Or where you think they would go. Like around candy, toys, ect.
~berry~

Posted: May 6, 2008

Author Comment:

Yes, Berry that indeed was a thoughtful suggestion. YES i surely will keep that in mind and will go to toy shops near by ones ....he loves cars and toys....

wow, this is really good, great poem! god was just teaching you a lesson, giving you life experience, and now you can be smarter. Toronto is very very busy, so it;s good you found your son! Great poem!

Posted: May 6, 2008

Author Comment:

u r right buddy. Not only Toronto is a not only HUGE but also has lots of weird characters all over the streets esp in Yonges' street.....
YES this indeed was a HUGE LESSON....I took his presence for granted and GOD reminded me that being a MOM is a serious business.....

wow its a great poem prathiba, poems need influences, its more than that in here. Excellent, I loved it.

Keep It up.

Posted: May 7, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks Fred. Thank you so much....Thanks

I can feel your terror at losing a child in a mall.. I am so glad it turned out ok. It is a horrible feeling when you turn round and they arent there.

Its so easily done in a crowded space.

You obviously love your son so very much and I am sure he feels loved and safe when he is with you. You are a wonderful Mum becuase you love and protect him. Thats all a child expects and all a parent can provide.

On a side note I feel that Eric was offensive and ignorant and please dont take such views to heart.

Peace
Boneman

Posted: May 7, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks Boneman,Thanks buddy.
YOU ARE SO RIGHT...As a parent , I am very apprehensive as to whether i am a good mom. Many times, i feel that i could have been better, esp when i lose patience ....Thanks, ur words will help me be kind to my own soul as well.
Regd Eric, I really agree with you and i have decided to stay away from such kinds of people. they r to be avoided.
And why do i need people like him when I have so nice and great people in my life....THANKS TO BOOKSIE

Don't blame yourself...wow! i'm so sorry

Posted: May 7, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks buddy. U know what he was not naughty. It was definitely my mistake. this poem will remind me always about my carelessness and i will be more careful next time

You made me cry! This was one of the saddest poems I've ever read in my life. It was heartbreaking. The emotions you threw out were so strong eve I felt them. Pratibha, this poem was a wonderful read. I'm so so sorry that you lost your son, but that you finally found him again. God is a savior, and I'm so glad that he and you worked together to find your son. Your son would be so proud to know that your love for him is this strong. It was such a cute and beautiful thing to write. And I love the last sentence of your poem. That one second is enough to change your life forever.
Great work as always, I'm also so happy to read your work:D

Posted: May 7, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks sweetheart. U r so right. GOD is indeed a saviour....
this poem story will always remind me to be really careful...
u took time out for me...and i am so thankful for such a sweet comment.
be there with me always...

Prathiba, I will start out by saying that as a father of a young boy, you have certainly captured the fear and desperation that I know that I would feel in that situation. That having been said, try to remember something that most people seem to forget- you were a person before you were a mother. You had, and still do have, your own desires, interests, wants, and needs. Something interested you for a moment. It happens. It doesn't make you a bad mother. It makes you a human. Feeling the fear, the desperation, the concern, that makes you a good mother. I have known many that would have thought "ah, they're around here somewhere" in those situations.

Posted: May 7, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks Buddy, i know i should take things more rationally...instead i feel really guilty if i think about myself.
I have to accept myself as a human first as u very correctly pointed out ...thanks ..that was indeed a lot of help...honestly
welcome back, i was missing you...

Wow-- yes ignore Eric!!!!!!! I can't believe that he used this poem to comment that on-- he could of commented on your page (actually he shouldn't have commented at all)!!!!!!!!!! And Stephen can be used for a girl too, but it is pronounced differently I think this is what you meant it to sound like, right? Ste-fin. Or something like that... I don't know... Just ignore what he said. Unless Steph doesn't want you to call her that, than call her what you want:). It's just his own opinion-- and look at all the other wonderful comments here-- they all speak opposites of what he commented.

But anyway I just wanted to come back to this poem and read it again, and tell you that it's one of the featured writings-- and that it's ranking first on the Top 20:)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lot's of special chocolate to you,

Ghiradelli Girl.

Posted: May 7, 2008

Author Comment:

Dear Dear CHOCO,
u r so young and yet so sensible...Hats off to ur parents...they are indeed blessed to have a daughter like you and now I am blessed to have u in my life...
with so much positivity around, who cares for eric's comments..??
But ur comments only made me realise that i should not take that seriously....way to go, little kid....

Big sis, you made it to the home page.^^

Posted: May 7, 2008

Author Comment:

Dearest Punishment,
It's all because of all you sweet people around me...boy u r lucky for ur big sis....u know that ....right??

Rekha Samuel
(not registered user)

My dear Pratibha,
The most important thing to remember is that all of us are human and that God protected your little Kriish, and that YOU FOUND him........
You are a fabulous mom, one momentary lapse doesn't ever change that,
lots of love,
Rekha

Posted: May 7, 2008

Author Comment:

Dear Rekha
As usual, u again helped me realise that i, too, should take a break...yes, u r right...i should take a lesson and be strong....thanks buddy

Smaranika
(not registered user)

Hi Pratibha,

A very very heart rendering poem. Very well written, congrats.

But remember, its only human to err, and you didn't do it knowingly. It just happened. Dont be too hard on yourself. Alls well that ends well. But lesson learnt for the future!

Krish is lucky to have such a loving Mom and he will be proud of you when he reads your poem when he grows up.

Posted: May 7, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks a Lot Di,I know u r busy ...still u took time out for me....I pray to GOD that NO mother should go through this.....ever
thanks Di

I loved it so much. And im thirteen and when i was with my little brother and he ran off i was scared to death i didnt know wat to do but try to find him.

Posted: May 8, 2008

Author Comment:

That is so shocking, buddy. I know what u would have gone through and u r so so young.....it feels as if the world has stopped and everything is finished ....right?
but then GOD helps us....right??
Thanks for such a lovely comment

Parthiban K V
(not registered user)

Hi Prathiba,

A very good and heart felt poem u have had written.

Krish is lucky to have such a loving Mom not only him but sanjeev also.Take care of ur family with gud protection by god's grace.

Self confidence is the best weapon to ruled out anything in our life. U proved it by this poem.
take care
bye

Posted: May 8, 2008

Author Comment:

Thank you so much Parthiban
honestly ur comments made my day...thanks for taking time out of ur busy schedule and writing this wonderful comment

May God bless you and your son. Very very heartfelt, gripped at mine.

Posted: May 8, 2008

Author Comment:

Thank you so much. I know as a mom, and as a woman, these feelings tug at our heart strings and help us worry so much

These words you have expressed are from so deep within the soul, i felt your pain and fear plus strength and love, It must of been one of the hardest times for you at that moment in time,.. the unknowen is very hard to cope with at the best of times...I commend you for your work and sharing this really sad time...yet i smile to know that Kriish is now safe in the proctected love of such a wondefull mother...Life can be so cruel sometimes....I wish you well and lots of sunshine and happy days, I also think you should show this to Kriish when his older ....... he will understand the depth of your love for him........Juliet X

Posted: May 8, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks Juliet
As usual ur mindblowing comment made my day
Now, i am stuck with you forever for commenting on my work and helping me grow...U will be there ...right?
urs truly
julie

Pratibha,
I have a five year old son and reading this was chilling. As the Booksie page came up all I saw was your name and the words "I lost my son." My heart stopped and I held my breath as I read your story and poem. Wow! you scared the hell out of me. I can't imagine how you must of felt but your poem expressed it very well. Children are so precious and fragile. Your story was a wake up call for me to be more vigilant with my son. Not that I haven't been, but it is so easy to forget for just a second. It is ashame that our world is so terrifying that we can't leave our children for even a second. On the other hand I don't want to be so protective that my son becomes a prisoner. This is the dilemma for parents today. We want to protect them, yet we don't want to suffocate them either. Being a parent today is not an easy task. God was looking out for you and your son, but I think your love for him brought him back to you. The greatest gift you can give your child is love. Everything else is just life testing you. Your love was tested and you passed with flying colors! God bless you and Kriish. I hope you have a Happy Mothers Day. You deserve it.
Peace,
Crow Feather

Posted: May 8, 2008

Author Comment:

i absolutely agree with your point of view.
And i feel so guilty when i used to argue with my MOM.....Now I know being a parent is no easy task
The world is now full of weirdos for sure. If they ask for money , we r ready to sell ourselves ...right?
But if they never ask us anything and just our kids away.
what to do then?
Thanks CF, i am surely going to read ur writings because ur comment did make me think

Hi there Pratibha. I read your poem and I can sense that fear you were having when you lost your son and thanks to God Almighty you found him back. Please don't be too hard on yourself. I may be eighteen and there's not much I understand, but I know how great a Mother would feel if she'd lost her child. I heard a great deal of children missing these days. You bring a powerful message to everyone through this poem. But please, don't blame yourself too much. Just be grateful. God bless you.

Posted: May 8, 2008

Author Comment:

At a tender age of 18, u r so sensitive and sensible....way to go...
MAY GOD BLESS YOU....
Thanks a lot, honey

A beautiful poem which speaks the mind of a mom. Every word is resonant with your affection and sense of attachment with your son. I really liked it. I wish Kriish reads the poem. Then he 'd understand he's got the world's best mom.

I also feel this poem is a lesson for all moms, would-be-moms and yet-to be- moms of the world, especially on the eve of Mother's Day. Keep writing. LOL.

Posted: May 8, 2008

Author Comment:

*Blushing*.....thanks....in fact i was shocked for 3 days after that incident. How careless I was to just get lost in something so meaninless and almost my life..
his face still comes in my dreams ...crying, helpless, calling "mama, Mama"...
Oh My GOD, no mother should ever go through this trauma
Thank you so much for such a thoughful comment. Thanks a lot...

I can say that from reading this, I know you're an excellent mom. It's not always entirely the parent's fault(curiosity killed the cat), that a child wanders off, but it is the parent's duty to pay attention, and at least you cared enough to realize in those few crucial moments that your son was missing.

Save this one for Kriish forever. He'll read it someday and truly appreciate you as a mother because you care so much and love him so much, and eventhough Feng Shui left you careless for a moment you remembered him and you FOUND him! And that's what is important, YOU FOUND him!

Posted: May 8, 2008

Author Comment:

yes , honey , i found him...i am sure he was feeling so lonely and left out and was crying helplessly when i found him...it brings tears in my eyes everytime i think about his face ...helpless , lonely...in a dangerous situation
GOD Forbid, if anything would have happened to him, i would have hanged myself.
GOD chose me to be his mom and it is MY responsibility and I am so so grateful to you for echoing my feelings

I love this poem and the spirit it shows as a parent.As a Mother and a grandmother I can truly say I understand your fear. In the world that we live in today anything can happen. This poem took me back to the time my son, (4 at the time) hid under the clothes rack while I was shopping. By the time I notice he was gone panic mode 101 had set in. I was out of my mind. searching everywhere. Screaming out of control. About 10 minutes later I head my name being called on the loud speaker telling me to report to security, they had my son. Its not they they found him, he found them. God is good all the time. Don't be so hard on yourself, believe me one day when your son is grown, you'll both have a good laugh about all the things he did as a child. May God bless you forever in a day.

Posted: May 9, 2008

Author Comment:

panic mode, screaming....I can absolutely identify that. GOD what a day....
whenever his face full of tears and fear comes in front of my eyes, i cry
one day we surely will laugh at the entire thing
thanks for such an encouraging remarks
thanks a lot

ur son found them....one intelligent kid for sure....He must have made u feel so proud by reaching out to a safe place
GOD, what u would have gone through that day....

satya
(not registered user)

hi pratibha, this is really nice poem, it signifies how much u love ur kid and how terrible experience u had. its really really horrifying experience when we loose somebody dear to us for a minute also. anyways god is great, u got ur kid without any harm to him. may god protect him and ur family always from all dangers of life and bless with all happiness.

Posted: May 9, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks Satya, as usual, u took time out for me and visited my profile and read my poem. I am so glad u r in my life as my friend

that was really good. im glad that kriish was found. it reminds me of the time i got lost in a theme park when i was two...

Posted: May 9, 2008

Author Comment:

Oh MY GOD,....how did ur parents find you. I am sure ur mom would have almost fainted....it sounds scary,,,,,theme park..so many people and so many distractions....

wow. nice poem. You shouldn't blame yourself you are a great mom,from what i read. We all make mistakes.This is a very nice poem .I hope your son reads it someday and appreciate your love.

Posted: May 9, 2008

Author Comment:

Dear Raya,
u r a kid and still u could understand my emotions ....and could pacify me.
I am not able to forget his face till now and I still cannot sleep in the nights properly....i get nightmares and i get up sweating....and make sure he is safe...HE SLEEPS with us since his birth and we have never let him sleep in a separate room ever.He sleeps in between both of us always.What a divine feeling.....to know that your child is safe and sleeping next to you....

I'm glad you got your son back. That poem was heart wrenching. I hope that he is OK and can be safe with you.
Good luck.

Posted: May 9, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks honey, Yeah i got him back and this incident left a deep scar in my soul for being careless.
Thanks a lot for such a sweet response.

Vikash Kumar
(not registered user)

Pratibha,
Thanks god you found KRIISH.
I am really touched by what you have written. Only a mother can write this, only she can understand the feeling, when her child is not infront of her eyes. You poem really made me feel like crying.

For a mom: Thanks god that you got KRIISH back.

And for a poet:Keep up the good work.

Posted: May 9, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks Bhaiya, Thank u so much

sarika verma
(not registered user)

Congratulations !!! You celebrating MOTHERS DAY today!! blessings to Kriish.

Posted: May 11, 2008

Author Comment:

THANKS for this lovely wish .....Thanks...woooo hooooo *VERY HAPPY*

Very Touching!

Im really glad you got your soon back!

Posted: May 11, 2008

Author Comment:

thanks...*SMILING*

go loves you and forgives you ^^
thank you for brightening up my day with this refreshement ^^

Posted: May 11, 2008

Author Comment:

indeed a delightful comment....thanks Gigi

i remember a mother asked me to hold her son for a few moments... we were at a zoo and i was distracted and he was gone in the next second....

I was old enough to know how frightening it was. The was you kept pleading over and over that he be ok was EXACTLY how my mind was rushing with desperation!!!!!! I wasnt walking to look for him, i was running!!!!!

Oh how the heart really does beat louder than any other momentn in your life.... but you have him back and that is all that matters. I found the boy i had lost of SOMEONE ELSE. It was terrible the way the mother reacted when she found out, i had never felt so shameful before....... so i understand that it is a powerful feeling, i am not a mother, not even a girl. But that experience changed a lot of thigns about me, and i cant imagine how terrifying it would be for the actualy mother......

Such a great poem that captures the moment, thankyou for inviting me to read it and sorry for taking so long.

Posted: May 11, 2008

Author Comment:

it's okay Lion heart.....U are so honest to admit it and hats off to you..it indeed takes a lot of effort to admit....And it does not matter that you are not a girl. Ur emotions are very strong and I really appreciate that ....your thought is just like a mother.
My blessings to you ....

This really did grip me. You obviously care very deeply for your son and life without him is no life at all. You sound like a woderful mother and it is not oyur fault. You can't have your eyes glued to him 24-7, it's impossible. You did your best and that's all we can do. It could've happened to anyone. May God be with you. :) Eternal Night

Posted: May 12, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks Buddy. I have to get out of this feeling of guilt or else i will be doomed heeee heeee
Thanks for such a lovely wish and yes May God be with you as well Eternal light for writing so well


I have sons.
Now they are in the larger flow of life. Soon I'll be grandfather.

I can assure you, those things happen.
It happened once or twice with me and my wife.
That means not that you do not love your son.
If you see it the other way around it is exactly the contrary.

And your son soon forgot those little moments of despair.
But that was also important for him. In those lonely lost moments he had the fist painful experience of uncertainty. But living life is also that sometimes.

You are a good mother.
Do not feel sad.
Both learned in that second one truth of all This - impermanence -.

It is now in the past.
Enjoy the seconds of everyday.

Thank you for your sharing with the readers, beautiful mother.

Posted: May 12, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks Vulkan. Oh My GOD, such a sweet and heartfelt reply. Made my day *jumping all over the room* woo hoo

I have now found time. And so I sat down to read your work (finally) and this is the first one that I've been dying to read.
I know that everyone else has told you this, but it won't hurt again. You are NOT a bad mother. We make mistakes but from those mistakes we become better, stronger, wiser. We are human and we are going to make mistakes. That's life. And I'm sure losing your son just for that moment, it was terrifying! I would have been panicking too. One second can feel like an entire lifetime in a moment of panic and desperation. And this in this poem, you showed us your worry and grief and you brought it to life and made the reader feel with you, feel that panic - that rush - the horrible twisting and knotting feeling in the pit of your stomach when something goes wrong.
I'm so happy that your son is okay. You are a great mother, and one day, I hope Kriish can read this. Be strong, keep your head up, and smile. Take care Pratibha :)

Posted: May 12, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks ALice...i know it's such a gut wrenching feeling i tell u....
GOD , no mom should ever ever face this

Timeturnedfragile170
(not registered user)

your a good mom! like others have said, everybody gets lost at least once.
i'm not a mom and i cant comprehend just how scary that must have been for you,
your writing does a good job of expressing just how a mom may feel in such a scary situation,
loves
always,
Sam

Posted: May 12, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks Sam
it indeed feels good to hear these words.
thanks for reading this poem.Thanks

Dear Pratibha,
your feelings mirror mine when I lost my then 4-year-old daughter for a few minutes at an exhibition. I kept looking in the same spot and listening hard, exactly as you did and then a policeman at the site carried her to me. I was counting on her to cry loud as she does for the slightest reason and I'm grateful she did, and still does, cry aloud for the slightest of reasons. something that I used to tell her not to do before I lost her, is now music to my ears. You're a wonderful Mom. Don't be too hard on yourself...

Posted: May 13, 2008

Author Comment:

yes yes, that cry helps....after coming back, i kept inforcing the thought in his mind to CRY , cry loudly so that i would follow that noise and trace him...

we agree so much ....lol
thank GOD u traced her .....exhibition sounds scary....right?

please dont be so hard on yourself what happened to you happens to 99% of parents out there the emotions you display in your poem tell me that you are a very loving very caring mother and your little boy is very much loved and cherished

Posted: May 13, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks Angel, like your name , your words are also so soothing and so healing.....*relieved*
Thanks

badri vai
(not registered user)

Dear prativa,
the Almighty has indeed lend a very kind hand in this fiasco.
honest and God fearing souls(u and endua)will ALWAYS come out sucessful from this kind of accidents.
God bless KRISH.
do not curse yourself so hard,these are part and parcel of a busy and hectic life.
keep smiling

Posted: May 13, 2008

Author Comment:

What a surprise Badri Bhai. Thanks a lot

uma baskar
(not registered user)

Dear Pratibha,

I could really feel the pain you could have gone through, as you know even i have experienced it, don't be so harsh on yourself, i would really appreciate you for the courage you had. As you always believe God will help you to go through it. Kriish is really lucky to have you as his MOM. You're a wonderful Mom. So both of you keep smiling!

Posted: May 14, 2008

Author Comment:

Yes Uma, i remember that day when ur 1 and half yr old daughter disappeared amongst clothes rack in Winners and was not making any sound and you were mad with all possible thoughts
I did witness a helpless mom's tears and i experienced the same thing...
thanks buddy for taking time out for me

That's really a terrible thing to encounter. We learn so much from it though.

We did have the same experience. Terrible but funny (as I think about it now) because there were four of us---my brother, his wife, my mom and I. There was a BIG SALE in almost all items in the mall. We were busy looking at various items without knowing that we left my nephew unattended. He was, I think, 3 yrs old then. It was my brother who first asked where the child was. When we could not find him nearby, we were alarmed because there were a lot of people around. We searched all over the place and that took less than an hour. Until it came to me he might be in the Toy Section which was indeed a brilliant guess. I hurriedly went there and saw him in a his most amusing childly behavior. He loved cars and he was in the state of confusion which one to pick. When he was decided, he grabbed one and as he found me (still shocked), he looked at me and asked, "buy car?" as if nothing happened. Whenever I remember that incident, I only remember one thing: his innocence. It makes me smile but at the same time, it makes me feel fear.

Posted: May 22, 2008

Author Comment:

This is so cute....."buy car?"

U know what mine said, "why did YOU move? I was scared."

I laugh today, but I indeed died almost that day.....

good one ....

Well...I certainly FELT your heart pounding as you wrote this...and cannot think of a better way to deal with these emotions than through poetry and it's release for your soul. Do not search in others for the strength that you KNOW is in you.
I have 4 sons and years ago we all lived on a heavily wooded acreage. One morning my 2nd son disappeared, i saddled my twin babies on my hips and grabbed the hand of my other son and we headed into the bush to look for #4. He, thank God, left a trail of monopoly money that we followed (sorta) and found him. I sobbed for hours. So, go about your day knowing that we all experience such terror but KNOW that it's never intentional and some bonds are just never broken. THe bond that is created when he draws warmth from your chest and will savour for life as he matures.

Posted: May 23, 2008

Author Comment:

Oh MY GOD, what not u would have went through that day.
Were u alone?
Why did he go? Must be playing and did not realise.
YOU ARE A STRONG MOM PEACH....I INDEED FELT ENCOURAGED WITH THIS COMMENT.
THANK GOD U FOUND HIM AND YES THEY R A BUNCH OF WARM SOULS...RIGHT?
u know what he said to me, 'mama u should not move. Stay put.'

I am so glad you shared your experience. You made it so alive. It was like I was right there experiencing the same anguish. Very well written.

Posted: May 28, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks Susan, this comment from you made me feel so relaxed, i cannot tell you. A mother understands.

Oh my GOD, I'm crying.. This piece is so sad, so touching.. I got goosebumps and shivers.. Wow.. just wow! I'm so sorry you lost him, even for that length of time, it must have been so horrible.. I can feel it in this poem... It's so beautifully written, straight from the heart. I am glad you found him though. I love this piece, Pratibha, your son is lucky to have a mom like you. :) Thank you for sharing..

Posted: Jun 16, 2008

Author Comment:

I am so happy that U came to read this one....I died more than a zillion times in that 15 min and I pray that no mother should ever lose her child....it's like a body without a heart and a soul....

your comment is so soothing,,....THANK YOU....

That was so intense!
I can understand how guilty you were feeling but please understand that this incident only made you realise how precious yoy son is and i am sure you are never going to repeat such a thing again...

Posted: Jun 24, 2008

Author Comment:

YES HONEY FOR SURE...things r so so different in this part of the world....scary for sure....

Great Job. I Really Liked This. We Can Never Take Anything For Granted. Things Like This Is A Wake Up Call For Us All. Feel Free To Read My Poems If You Wish.

Posted: Jul 12, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks buddy...we really think alike...



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