Submitted: Apr 27, 2008
Reads: 299
Comments: 23
Likes: 5
I run to my room
I lock the door
I pick up my knife
I sit on the floor
I turn up my music
I let my tears fall
I cut my arms twice
I hug my old doll
I think about past times
I know he’s done this before
I want to forget
But I hear him pounding on the door
I want to hide under my bed
I want to drive away in a car
I want to be safe in my coffin
I refuse to get another scar
He has hurt me one too many times
I never want to go through the torment again
I’ll be normal
I’ll never be able to say, “Remember when…”
So I pick up my knife
As I sit on my floor
I slice my wrists fast
As he breaks open the door…
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Comments:
i love this!!! makes me sad and reflect to my past though :'( but you did a great job capturing the mood as usual! lol its moving :) good job tori
Posted: Apr 28, 2008
Hope it didn't happen to you emoheart.
Sad read. But great poem. The emotion was well-captured.
Keep writing leaf-talker ^^
Posted: Apr 29, 2008
Such a very srong subject and you covered it really well heart in mouth as i read this and the thoughts well they ran wild....you must write some more...you know what they say...the more you write the easier it becomes...well done very powerfull stuff....
Posted: Apr 29, 2008
I agree with mum55: this was a powerful subject and you expressed it beautifully. It flowed very well and it had my eyes glued to the page. Definitely well done. Usually it's hard to force out a tough subject but this was good.
:)
-SnowQueen
Posted: May 2, 2008
see that is a great poem that i am hoping isn't from experiecnce.it was very desriptive. i hate bland stuff. anyway keep it up.
Lydia_xxxx
Posted: May 4, 2008
oh my gosh. thats so sad.
Posted: May 9, 2008
This is really provoking...
Posted: May 11, 2008
really sad...i know alot of people who go through stuff like this...you did really well portraying it and i only hope it isn't taken from first-hand experience
Posted: May 14, 2008
hi! tori. it almost seems personal. this subject is too touchy and after the father breaks in, i didn't wish to read further. but one must face facts. ;-)
Posted: May 15, 2008
Great, but sad. Your writing style reminds me of my own.
Posted: May 27, 2008
i can really reate this is really good you make really good imagery it's impressing.I loved it though can't wait to read more!
Posted: May 27, 2008
veeerrry good. thisis really sad though.
"I run to my room
I lock the door
I pick up my knife
I sit on the floor"
that is my favorite stanza.
Posted: May 31, 2008
haha, awsome.
although i must say...it hits very close to home on my childhood...but it was a gr8 poem!!
Posted: Jun 9, 2008
this is very well written and really captures the emotion its soooooo sad to know that for some this is a reality it saddens me to know that some kids out there feel that to ease the pain of life they have to inflict more pain upon themselves a lot of people could not write about such a sensitive subject as well as you have good job :)
Posted: Jun 19, 2008
Its really well written.. And if anything, I can empathize with the poem :(
But it's really evoking.. Touched a string in my heart :)
Posted: Jun 24, 2008
oh sweetie.... :( this is sad and reminds of way tooooooo many things
Posted: Jun 27, 2008
oh but great job
Posted: Jun 27, 2008
danny4ever
(not registered user)
wow tori ur talented keep wrighting plz
Posted: Jul 3, 2008
amazing...
sad, but truthful its what goes on i guess
really well written i love the first stanza
keep writing :D
Posted: Jul 9, 2008
wow that was a very well written, emotional and raw poem. I really liked it. Congrats on a poem well done!
Posted: Jul 20, 2008
i never cease to be amazed how a poem as strong and touching as this , can come from such an horrific subject .
you are a very talented lady.
Posted: Jul 29, 2008
what?
that's so sad:(
Posted: Aug 8, 2008
