How did he know?
Why was he here?
Is he going to stop me?
I remain absolutely still, looking up at the sky, not at the head lights of the car nearby. Last time I checked it was going to arrive very soon.
So where was it?
The person in the car got out, footsteps echoing as the person walks towards my direction. What is he going to do?
"Ethan?" my brother asks aloud, awaiting a response.
I close my eyes to his voice, if my hands weren't currently occupied, I would cover my ears. However, I can't do anything but wait. Wait for the exact thing that would end everything to arrive. Preferably before my brother caught sight of me. No such luck.
"Ethan! What are you doing?" he cries spotting me.
Michael runs up to me and grabs my shoulders.
"Why?" he demands, shaking my shoulders. I continue to say nothing, he's ruined everything. I continue to look up at the sky, and not anywhere near the sihouette of my brother. Blocking out some of the midnight sky. Finally I hear the horn of the oncoming train, but so does my brother. He looks up desperately in the direction of the horn. Frantically he tries to pull me from the train tracks, however I do not budge an inch. He notices the handcuffs on both of my wrists, attached to the tracks. I look at him, he's crying and continue to pulls on my arms, I don't feel the pain of the handcuffs digging into my skin.
"Why?" he demands again out of frustration, pounding my chest with his fists in frustration.
"I'm waiting" I whisper,finally answer him.
"For what?" he cries, he's sobbing now, head bowed almost touching me, his hands clenching my shirt.
I look up at him square in the eyes, "To let go". At that, my brother pushes off me, as if to leave me alone. I hear him open a car door and close it. I hope he leaves, so he doesn't have to see this. However, I once again hear his footstepts, dislodging the crushed stones with his frantic running. As he reachs me once again he kneels down beside me, and takes out a hammer. My eyes widen a little bit, thoughts flaring, but I calm down again once I realize that he wouldn't be able to break anything with it. The train is almost here, just one more minute, was all I needed. My brother lifts the hammer up and brings it down on the chain of the handcuffs. It rings, and nothing else. He hits it a dozen more times frustration flaring; it's not working, thank god. I stare at him wondering what he was going to do.
"Please leave..." I whispered out loud in the cold night, my brother shouldn't have to see this.
Would he watch as his 16 year old younger brother gets crushed by a train?
No, I figured as he lifts the hammer once again above his head and brings it hurtling down on my hand. A sickening crunch sounded out before I screamed in pain. I start to struggle, to kick my brother, to do something as he sets the hammer on my hand again. He does it to the next hand, with me crying in agony. I was wrong, completely wrong when I thought he wouldn't be able to break anything with that stupid hammer.The train is in view, my brother doesn't look up, too intent on his goal.
"Just leave me to die!" I scream at the top of my lungs, bucking my legs to get a good angle at him. The tracks were rattling, the train was approaching at a sickening speed. Anguish built up inside me that my brother would die too, all for my cause. The tracks and everything that surrounded us was lit, the trains light focused on us. The object of my desire was so close, I could feel the air buzz with activity. I was relaxed, and ready for the inveitable, when I felt Michael take my wrist and yank it through a handcuff, wrenching the skin and bones through the small hole, he imitates his actions for my other hand. I feel him lift me as he grabs my midsection and pulls me off the train tracks. We tumble down the loose rocks, my brother losing his purchase on me and we plunge to the bottom of the incline. The tracks continue to rattle, and the atmosphere vibrates as the train goes by. I watch as my brother get up after tumbling down the side of the tracks. Once again I look up at the stars, waiting as the train that was supposed to kill me goes by. Everything is silent as I watch the stars disappear, my vision overcoming with darkness. Next thing I know, I hear sirens and flashing, I look in the direction of the road. Cops and paramedics, I get up without realizing it and run in the direction the train went. Thinking that I would be able to catch it before it passes me and leaves me stuck on this planet a minute longer.
"He's making a run for it!" a cop shouts, as they make their way to my brother, and where I had just resided.
"He's my little brother, don't hurt him!" Michael calls after them desperation laces his voice. I trip on the loose stones and fall to my knees, but I get up and keep running. My hands, a jumbled mess, are pressed tightly to my stomach as I run. An unanticipated tackle around the legs drops me down to the ground, and there I am face down on the stone, crying my eyes out. I can't look anyone in the face, especially with them shoving mine into the jagged stones.
"Be a little nicer it's a kid" one cop says above me. I make a move to get up, when they ease off of me in the slightest and the cop pushes me down again.Involuntarily,I yell out in pain, more of a sob than anything. The cops finally turn me over, they can barely discern my hands and clothes covered in blood in the little light they have. However, I can tell they knew what they were looking at, as their eyes grew wide with disgust.I started to sob,I couldn't help it, everything was taken from me in an instant. All the anguish I had felt for my brother, was now directed at myself. My death was ruined.