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Summer Camp, chapter seven side story: Missy's Thoughts

Short story By: Toni Roman
Young adult

Summer Camp, chapter seven side story: Missy's Thoughts

Submitted:Jul 26, 2013    Reads: 154    Comments: 0    Likes: 0   

Summer Camp

side story: Missy's Thoughts

Missy looked at the other girls. Cameron ate like a pig, often going back for fourths, and hadn't gained a pound since coming to Camp Shockenawe. May carbo-loaded before triathlons and major climbs and was in lean perfect shape. She burned off everything she ate and her doctor had actually told her to eat more to get her weight up. Dolly, by contrast, didn't exercise and ate whatever she liked and made Barbie dolls look fat by comparison. Dolly was thinner and more beautiful than a fashion model but healthy. Life is not fair. Babe still had baby fat but compared to her, Missy, Babe was skinny. In fact, Babe was neither fat nor skinny but world average. Not American average. Americans, on average, were fat. Jay Leno was right about that. Americans were exceeded only by the Pacific island welfare states (like Nauru) where the entire populations of those countries were overweight. Being fat and staying fat was built into American culture. Missy refused to feel sorry for herself. Missy refused to let Phil use euphemisms. "Call me fat. That's what I am." she told him. Missy knew two secrets that most dieters didn't know: setpoint and exercise. Missy's goal was to get down her weight and keep it down before reaching 21 because the weight you were at 21 was the weight you'd be stuck with the rest of your life. Unless you went the surgical route of liposuction and stomach stapling. Diets don't work because dieters sit on their fat asses and don't exercise. Missy exercised: volleyball, walking short distances, bicycling, and dancing. But since getting Phil as her personal coach, she had added walking long distances, aerobics, swimming laps with Babe, basketball, jumping rope, and running. Her one complaint about Camp Shockenawe was that it had no stairs.

Phil: "There are stairs in the grand lodge."

The grand lodge was a national parks-style rustic hotel adjacent to the Camp Shockenawe grounds reserved for the administrative staff and activity leaders who had to double up and share rooms. Camp Shockenawe owned the lodge, occupied it all summer and earned a profit from it as a resort hotel the other three seasons. The teens stayed in bunkhouses, log cabins, or tents depending on whether they had signed up early, were language program, or signed up late. Cameron lucked out only because Uncle Derek was on staff.

Missy: "There are? Thought it only had elevators."

Phil: "Fire code. Any building over one storey has stairs. Or use the Stairmaster in the exercise room."

Missy: "I hate those things and I hate treadmills. No sense of actually doing something or going somewhere."

Phil: "That's why the expensive ones have video screens or virtual reality helmets."

Missy: "I'm going to climb the stairs in the grand lodge."

[Teens at camp were prohibited from the grand lodge]

Missy did still more. Like the others she was 15. She had seen girls who were 17 burn off weight in weeks with sex. Real sex, not the oral stuff that the preteens did. Like any member of the upper class, Missy practiced safe sex. But she soon discovered that becoming un-fat practically required a twelve-step program in America. As she lost weight, Missy discovered that certain boys, African-American in particular, stopped liking her. She decided that she didn't need co-dependent enablers who would sabotage her weight loss program by encouraging her to eat sugar and fat (pork is not the only saturated one) because they liked a "mama" with a big behind. Talk about Freudian. Lower-lower class boys liked fat women. That's why they were poor. Upper-upper class men preferred skinny women. The skinnier the better. Why is anyone on Planet Earth surprised that all the good things in life -- money, beauty, brains, health, power, prestige, long life, education, and happiness -- go to them?

This is not to say that all black people are lower-lower class. That is obviously and statistically not true. There are middle class blacks and that guy in Phil's Cross-Cultural Training was a preppie. One who wouldn't talk to Phil because he was working class -- not because he was white. The Bantlings (Phil, Cameron, and their uncle) tried to pass as middle class but their working class background was obvious in the way they treated Cameron.

Lower class males always abused their females. And lower class women aided and abetted them. No upper class woman would put up with being called a bitch or a whore or being beaten. They had their divorce lawyers on speed dial. And third world countries with their insane religions! They threw acid in the faces of little girls for the "crime" of going to school.

Missy Lamb's parents were New Money. They were big (fat) people who came into their fortune by lotto, lucky investments, and hard work. They kept working after they won the jackpot. Missy was cursed genetically because both her father and mother and all four grandparents (and all eight great-grandparents as far as she knew) were fat. Her children would be fat and poor unless she could find and marry a rich skinny man. Preferably Bill Gates but he was already taken by Melinda Gates. As second generation money, it was up to Missy and her brothers to either consolidate the wealth or slide back into poverty. Missy liked being rich so she had to lose the weight and marry well. She had medical, financial, and common sense reasons to do so.

Besides the exercise, Missy slept nine hours a night and ate a zero-carb diet of grapefruit, lettuce salad, and so-called "negative calorie" foods. Foods that burned more calories to digest than they left.

And the day came when Phil put a plate of French fries in front of Missy and asked her if she would go back to a high-carb diet after summer camp was over and he was no longer around to motivate her.

Getting the weight off is easy compared to keeping it off.


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