Playboy

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic
A man telling his grandchild part of his story

Submitted: May 05, 2016

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Submitted: May 05, 2016

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Being a playboy is a good thing, right?

That's what I thought at the beginning until I knew the truth, as you know, we only focus on the good side of something but we never consider its disadvantages or the sacrifices that one makes to have something

Andros knows, he's a sixty years old man telling a story to his grandchild, Gus, Gus is 14 years old, he is very smart, he's the grandchild that anyone wishes to have

One night Gus asked for his grandfather's advice, he wanted to talk to a girl whom he really likes

*Andros: Son, I want to tell you that your grandfather was a playboy before he marries your grandmother

Gus: Is that true grandpa? -

*Yes son it is, I was the best playboy in town, but after knowing your grandmother I realized that being a playboy is the worst thing that has ever happened to me

-And how's that?

*It's a long story son, do you have the time to listen?

-Of course grandpa

*Okay, firstly I'm not going to mention names because I don't remember their names, but I do remember everything that happened by details

The first woman I've ever met is an exception to that, I do remember her name, her name was Andrea, she was the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, I remember the day we met, I was with my friends at a fantasy restaurant and so was she, I remember everything, there was a dance floor and a beautiful classic music that I'll never forget, we kept looking at each other for about a minute, I didn't have the guts to go and talk to her, but she was so brave, she came to me and started a conversation

*Andrea: Hi, I'm Andrea, what's your name?

-Andros: I'm …

*Yes?

-I'm …

*Okay nice to meet you, do you want to dance?

-I'm …

*Okay let's go

She pulled me to the dance floor, we danced on classic music for the first time in my life, and I'll never know how to describe it, everything was perfect

At the beginning of our relationship I was way too shy, but after a while, I opened up and was brave as much as she was, I found good aspects of my personality that I never know they exist

But sometimes your reasons to live turn into your reasons to die, our relationship became so dull at the end, we both reached a level that we don't care about each other anymore

Being "Uncaring" ends your relationships, being "Over-caring" ends your relationships too, but being "Balanced" keeps your relationships going, which rarely exists, changing from being "Uncaring" to being "Over-caring" destroys you and your relationships, Then eventually it will lead to being "Uncaring", always be balanced Gus

My thoughts started to change, I started to believe that love and happiness are sweet and beautiful illusions made unintentionally by women, that's the reason why men are forced to put their lives in the hands of women and have no control over their lives

Let me tell you something Gus, if a woman doesn't know you she'll run away from you, if she likes you she won't run away from you, but if she loves you, she'll run to you

Andrea loved me, but she was an exception, she ran away from me

She lied to me so many times, she has never stopped lying, and I have never stopped believing

She left

She disappeared

She walked away

She let me down

She broke her promises to me

She caused me so much trouble

It's always been her fault

And she has never stopped blaming me

Since she left, whenever someone tries to take her place I feel insecure, I think she cursed me

Everything has changed so fast, from "Promise you'll never love me" to "Promise you will never leave me" and finally "Promise you'll never come back"

I was the best flexible adaptive reaction to the surrounding environment, I changed again this time, but not from a shy man to a brave lover, but from a brave lover to a playboy

I had the ability and desire to feel, but I forced myself not to, for a particular reason that I still don't know or understand

Anyone talks to me about her I had the same answer over and over again, "Please do me a favor, don't tell me how to live my life when you need help living yours, get rid of your mistakes then let's discuss mine, thank you"

I knew that whether we're love-oriented seeking emotional love or fun-oriented seeking physical love, fun-oriented were love-oriented and they got disappointed

You know Gus, sometimes it's a good thing to understand and most of the time it's not

I had a new motto "Be the source of your own happiness until you find a life partner who makes you happy the way you make yourself"

I've never felt better, but to be honest, I was better

I knew so many women, but I didn't break their hearts, they knew that we were just having fun, I've never wanted anyone to know how much it hurts to be hurt and heart broken

I do remember saying "Sorry honey, but once I'm done having fun with you, I'm done with you" to a woman, and hearing it from another

I knew around 50 woman, can you imagine! 50! And I've never knew more than one woman at a time, we have fun for couple of months then we just stop talking to each other for no particular reason

But then I started to focus on my job, you know I used to work as HR manager, to be honest, after Andrea, women were only in my life to help me succeed and have fun

When I started to focus on work, my personality changed again, I became more organized, more serious and even more disciplined

Until I met another woman, she was the last one before your grandmother, her name was Jayne, and her personality was way close to my personality then

I met her at the same restaurant where I met Andrea, at the first time I saw her I decided to go and talk to her, and I did, we had a conversation about everything

*Andros: Do you know that I always start where people finish

-Jayne: Excuse me?

*Every single phase of my life I start, everyone else thinks of it as a destination

- I don't understand

*I'm Andros

-No, you're a show off

*Well, that's true, but that doesn't mean that you're now interested to know who is that crazy man trying to flirt

-You're terrible at flirting

*But excellent at grapping your attention

Then we continued our way to the weirdest conversation I've ever been in, I'll tell you what I remember Gus, you know grandpa is kind of old now

-How can you be so insensitive?

*I chose to be like that

-Why?

*Because I didn't have any other choice

-This means that you didn't choose anything

*You know sometimes I just want to call 911 and say "Please help me, here's a guy standing in front of me, he's going to kill me and I'm helpless" while I'm in front of a mirror

-That's a crazy feeling

*Yeah, sometimes I feel that I'm crazy and sometimes I feel unidentifiable

-Okay that's enough, let's talk about politics, you seem like kind of a guy who's interested in politics

*As a matter of fact I'm not, I more into psychology and philosophy

-Okay let's change the question, how to govern a society from you philosophical point of view

* Well it's easy, first thing you will need is the illusion of ability, which includes telling people that they can do anything they want anytime, and give them examples, your examples, of people who were able to do what they want and challenge everything, make them feel that everything that's happening is their fault and the message will be "hey buddy, you can do whatever you want anytime it's all up to you, but you're just too lazy to do it", this will make them feel safe, free, questioning themselves and not ready to do anything, no one will do anything, and those who try to do something, terminate them, because they will be the minority, and don't worry, you'll have the majority's support

-Wow, I didn’t see that coming, if this is your point of view, how can you feel so free?

* To feel free, change your interests into something that doesn't bother the authority, but keep in mind that if the bird is flying because he's afraid to land, that's not freedom

-Okay, now tell me how much do you believe in psychology

*Every single person has a different personality with his own personal details, there's no such thing as an absolute personality, there's no frame that can restrict human behavior, psychology helps you to understand most of people's actions, I'm not convinced that psychology is good at identifying people, but it's good to know how to deal with and handle people, in psychology everything is subjective, psychology is a tool not a destination

-Okay, that's an interesting point of view, but how do you classify people?

*Humans go through 4 stages

1-Fear

2-Bravery

3-Smartness

4-Wisdom

Heroes are brave and villains are wise

It has always been "Bravery versus wisdom"

They say "You either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain"

The question here is do you have the option to choose between dying as a hero or living as a villain?

The answer is no

Circumstances choose for you

They also say "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger"

If we put both quotes together it will be

"You either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the strong villain"

The fight is between a strong wise villain and a weak brave hero

Each of them get what they want

The hero gets an honorable death

And the villain ... wins

-That's pretty much what Joker says, so you prefer being a villain?

*It's better than dying

-With such personality and such ideas, do you have trouble dealing with people at work? You know, being an HR manager

*People always mix their social life with work, feelings and emotions drive the decisions they make, which is not professional

-I think everything you've become is because of Andrea

*Do think that I miss her?

-No, you miss the smell of her perfume, the wind going through her hair, her laughter, her smile, places you went together and the taste of her lips

*Wow! I thought that I miss her, that was close, thanks

-Come on, I didn't mean to remind you of her, I was just telling the truth, now tell me, when it comes to women, what are your plans?

*I need to be straight, forget about her, make real friends and forget about fun for a while and think about my feelings

-Will you do that?

*I don't want to

-So it's a battle between your desires and your needs?

*And the worst part is you can't have both

-So you need someone who provides you with both?

*She doesn't exist, and even if, I didn't find her yet

-Well she only exists as a girlfriend, as a fiancée or as a wife, not as a friend

*So it's all about finding a partner

-Finding "the right" partner, just look for your heart, you'll find your fun anyway

*I'll try

-Andros I want to ask you something, if I leave

*You mean "when" you leaves

-Okay, when I leaves, how will you get over me?

*I'll forget to remember you, and remember to forget you

-But you know what they say, even a fish wouldn't get into trouble if it kept its mouth shut

*Some people have fishing nets and will get you into trouble even if you keep your mouth shut

-You won't change

*The only thing that doesn't change is the fact that everything changes

-But you don't want this

*Sometimes the solution that fits you is not the best solution

-So you're telling me that there's a psychological barrier, and if anyone tries to cross it will get hurt and leave?

*Not anyone, only women

-Oh, great! This means you can't have close female friends?

*Probably, but it also means you'll be a faithful husband

-Yeah, and you're not a big fan of marriage, that's ironic, one last thing, do you think that now you have the perfect personality?

* I'm just putting the finishing touches on it

-Do you think I have a good personality?

*You were FORCED to fight but you CHOSE not to fight, that's the best thing about your personality, and the worst at the same time, but don't worry, you'll adapt

-Do you want to dance?

*No, I really need to go to bed to wake up early tomorrow, I have work to do, can we be friends?

-Friendship means respect, don't take it personal but I lost all respect to men long time ago

*Can you come tomorrow, they're honoring me for being the best HR manager they ever had

-I'll try

I was overthinking about how to stop overthinking about her, the following day, they were honoring me, the hall was full of women, guess what, every single woman I've ever knew in my entire life was there, including Andrea and Jayne, all of them came

When I received the certificate I took the mice to say something, I said "Thank you all for being there for me, I wouldn't make it without all of you, thank you, from the bottom of my heart"

They were applauding loudly, I cried, I think it was "tears of joy" but then, each and every single one of them started to disappear, one by one, and the applauding started to be quiet until it stopped, I wiped my tears to look at the audience and there was no one, only empty chairs

I didn't believe it, no one came, I was just imagining this, and the truth was I was being honored in an empty hall and no one came in the first place, I fell to my knees and cried again, but this time, it was "Tears of sadness"

That was the worst thing that I've ever experienced, I made it, but there was no one there to celebrate with, everyone was gone

-Gus: That's really sad grandpa

*Andros: Yeah son, I'm telling you all of this just to show you how can a broken heart do, and how important it is to be brave, love son, love is the answer, go and talk to her and never hurt or let anyone hurt you, and one last thing, never change

-Thanks grandpa, I'll talk to her, but what about grandpa, how did you meet my grandma?

*Well, Gus … that's a long story, do you have the time to listen?


© Copyright 2017 Nouby. All rights reserved.

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