Chapter 2: Missing

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic

Reads: 274

I successfully reach professor Waters' room without receiving any strange looks from passerby. Usually, no one goes to class at this hour, hence my stealth mode.

Damn. Kade has the same free period as me. IneedtoavoidhimasbestIcan.

Hesitantly, I open the polished wooden door and walk inside. Other than my wedged heels, it's silent. Eerily silent.

"Professor?" I call out shakily.

Am I really going to do this again?

I take a deep breath.

I'm so disgusted with myself. I wish I was smart. I wish I could understand everything like a normal human being, so I don't have to sleep around just to keep my grades stable. I'madisgrace.

I still lock the door.

"Ah, my favorite student," Professor's voice rings with happiness as I walk up to his desk. "Dréa."

I glare at him. "If I'm your favorite student, why did I drop down to a D? You said you'd fix my last few tests. You said you'd give me the grade I needed to pass this semester."

Instead of at least feigning concern, a wicked smile plasters his white, middle aged face. "I needed you. I knew you'd come up here if you saw that D on your student portal. And I was right. Little Red Rea came back to the big, great wolf."

Big Bad Wolf, actually.

I wish I could slap him. But I can't. He's the one in charge of grading. "Look... Just please raise my grades. Please."

I beg to avoid any type of physical contact. But of course, it fails.

"Come here, then." The greedy grin on his lips says he won't just give me the A. I have to "earn" it.

I already locked the door. That doesn't mean I wish no one would come in. I wish someone would knock, break down the door to stop professor Waters from touching me.

But if that happened, I'd fail this class. Not only that, but everyone would find out what I do. What I've been doing.

I'd be the black sheep of the entire university. The slut. The hooker. The whore. I'dget kickedout. I'dneverbeacceptedintoanycollegeeveragain.

I've tried studying. I've read the entire math textbook on weekends, which was a huge waste of my time, because all I can do is solve for y and x. When it comes to real solving, I'm as useful was a cat.

I'm destined to be a failure, that's why.

I fight back tears as he enters inside me. I always try to make myself daydream of anything besides what's happening so the sex is less painful: porn, erotic novels, thinking of literally anything else to keep me wet, so the deed doesn't hurt.

I close my eyes the entire time. Instead of seeing a professor, I imagine my future husband. A great man with a stable job who cares for me. Comes back from work and hugs me tight, saying he missed me and how much he loves me. How special I am to him.

Then reality sets in like a dark fog, suffocating any source of life. I remember I'm not good enough to have a husband like that. I'm not even worthy of a husband. Not with what I do in college just to get by.

Who would even want me? I'm a broken, torn, ugly shell of a human being. My inner core to feel anything like appreciation, forgiveness, love and happiness has been missing within the span of two years.

Maybe it's just gone. Obliterated.

I open my eyes when I know he's done. "That was great," He breathes heavily. "I'll raise your grades right away." Professor Waters buckles up his pants and kisses my forehead.

Don't kiss me socasually.

An I really in the position to say that? I give this man sex casually.

"I gotta go now," My dry voice echoes in the room as he settles in his chair behind his dark, metal desk. "I'll see you later."

The words that had spilled from my mouth disgust me even further.

He smiles almost kindly at me.

Don't smile at me like that, bastard.

"See you," He waves me off as I quickly leave the room. Begging for that Kade boy not to randomly pop up and ask me annoying questions, I run-walk to the girl's dorm, desperate to get inside that damn shower.

I feel ugly. Disgusting. I've never been so lucky, dare I use the word, to have gone to a college where they have a myriad of showers for students.

I open my duffle bag to take out a clean dress, leaving it atop the bag.

I strip myself of my smelly blue dress. Even if no one else could smell it, I could. The scent of disgusting sex is just surrounding me. Suffocating me.

I scrub my skin with the red cloth hard. I scrub until I see red rashes form on my arms and legs.

It's still not gone.

It's like clip from a movie. The man will wash his hands over and over but in the end, the blood is still on his hands.


Submitted: May 06, 2016

© Copyright 2022 Kirari. All rights reserved.

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