Big Mama’s Downhome Indian Italian Pizza Pie(from the Subcontinent)

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
Another chapter in the never ending saga of the Legendary Big Mama, her All American Culinary Expertise and All American Gourmet Kitchen. "Then one day, she walked into the local Target to get some feminine hygiene products for some fallen male police detectives who had wandered into her shelter with menstrual cramps, and there it was—prepackaged, mass produced naan."

Submitted: May 19, 2016

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Submitted: May 19, 2016

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Big Mama has been around a long time.  To look at this gray skinned, gray haired, tobacco chewing old woman with the gray picket fence smile and droopy protuberances, you’d never think that at one point she was the ebony skinned, dark haired, dark eyed beauty with a body sculpted by God and a star bright smile who posed for the statues of Uma:  the great goddess who is invariably portrayed as a slender, sensuous woman of great beauty in her role as wife and mother.  See her photo above or at this link.  https://www.flickr.com/photos/eddiecmorton/sets/72157627761733542/with/6190963884/

That indeed was truly a very long time ago in a land real far away.  Today, she makes her home in New Orleans tending to fallen street cops in need of salvation, but when she was in India, she fell in love with the bread—the naan.  When she is in New Jersey and New York, she is able to get world-class naan and she eats her fill, but the New Orleans area is a dead zone when it comes to naan.  True naan is prepared by hand, and stretched and then slapped against the inside wall of a wood fired oven.  When it falls off the wall, it is ready to eat.  She particularly enjoyed the naan with melted butter that was mixed with garlic and crushed red pepper.  When she was in India, she had learned to appreciate Ghost Chilies, which may very well be the hottest chilies in the world. 

Maybe the universe.

Then one day, she walked into the local Target to get some feminine hygiene products for some fallen male police detectives who had wandered into her shelter with menstrual cramps, and there it was—prepackaged, mass produced naan. 

Some of it was seasoned with garlic. 

It had been a long time since Big Mama had wrapped her gums around some truly fine naan and when she gummed a piece of the stuff that she had bought in the Target she knew that it would be a while longer, too.  But, she didn’t want to throw the stuff away, and it did look a little like real flat hand tossed pizza crust, so she decided to try using just for that.

Success!

The recipe is

  • One piece naan

  • Tomato paste (use a brand with an Italian name)

  • Salt

  • Garlic (powder or fresh)

  • Dried Thyme

  • Dried Basil

  • Sea salt

  • Sliced pepperoni (preferably and Italian brand) (Optional)

  • Shredded Provolone or mozzarella cheese(not fresh)

  • Sliced tomato

  • Sliced mushroom (Optional)

  • Sliced purple onion (Optional)

  • Sliced fresh jalapeno (Optional)

  • Fresh ground red pepper (chili de arbol or chili Japanese)

Procedure:

  1. Spread the tomato paste on the naan

  2. Sprinkle salt, thyme, basil and garlic powder on the tomato paste

  3. Place the pepperoni on top of this

  4. Sprinkle the mushrooms and or jalapeno  on top of this

  5. Sprinkle shredded cheese on top of this

  6. Sprinkle the onion across this

  7. Spread the tomato slices atop this

  8. Bake in preheated oven on top rack for 20 minutes at 450 degrees

  9. Sprinkle the fresh ground red pepper on the hot toasty tomato

  10. Chow down.

If you’re man enough or woman enough for the challenge, try some ground Ghost Chili with it.

Buon divertimento!

 

Links:

History of Uma  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uma_(goddess)

Pepperoni  http://battistonibrand.com/

Tomato paste  https://www.sunofitaly.com/store/products/Tomato-Paste-%28Cal%29.html

 


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