Independent Woman

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Young Adult  |  House: Booksie Classic

Submitted: May 25, 2016

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Submitted: May 25, 2016

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I used to be taught that an independent woman is a woman who doesn’t need a man. She has the personality to be able to do anything that a man does. She has the talent and skills to be able to match men in whatever they do. She is emotionally strong and may cry over a man, but not for long. She doesn’t need men, after all. She just needs herself.

This message makes for a rather cold-hearted woman. The truth is, we need men. This makes us vulnerable. We get hurt. And there’s nothing wrong with that.

An independent woman isn’t a woman who just needs herself. An independent woman is a woman who knows who she is, likes herself a lot, and enjoys her life. She needs men, but she’s not clingy around them.

When I met Jesse, the love of my life, I had some of this down.

I had done some soul-searching, actually really intense soul-searching, and found out what was important to me in life. My morals were important to me. Being a righteous and honest person. I liked myself, a lot. I knew how valuable I was. And I knew that I could find the best man for me, just by being myself. 

Jesse could sense this about me. It’s not something that we can fake. I wasn’t afraid to express myself in situations, not because I was brash, but because I knew I was right. I was genuinely kind to people. 

I knew he was attracted to me. Not on a superficial level. But, me.

This felt really good. I knew I deserved it.

Things changed when I started to like Jesse back. It wasn’t just a superficial like. I liked him a lot. I had set the bar high, for a man. I saw Jesse’s character, and I knew how he treated me. I knew that Jesse was the real deal. 

And now, I had to finish working on myself. To be the rest of the independent woman, that I was not. This was only fair to both myself and Jesse.

Even though I was fairly confident in myself, I didn’t actually know how to enjoy life by myself. This was something that just hadn’t come to me yet.

But, I learned.

I learned to not let negative situations bring me down too much. I practiced being open-minded about life. 

My schedule filled up. I became busier. But it wasn’t the kind of busy that felt forced. And I wasn’t so busy that I felt frazzled, not in the slightest. I was enjoying my life.

But I still thought of Jesse often. He was still central to my life. 

And now, Jesse saw how I was both a very dependent and independent person. Not just in theory, but in practice.

It made him wildly attracted to me. He didn’t have to tell me that. I already knew it.

And I felt powerful.


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