Self-Image

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Non-Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic
Just a little bit about myself, hope you enjoy it and get a little kick out it it (:

Submitted: May 31, 2016

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Submitted: May 31, 2016

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Facial Expressions

First impressions are important, that is a worldwide known concept. This is specifically hard for me, because sometimes- okay, most of the time- I am not super cognitive of the world around me. I tend to zone out a lot and my main awkward-situation saver is a joke; which frequently makes the situation even more awkward.

Honestly, who even remembers first impressions? I do not even remember the first time I met my best friend. I mean I remember that day and the direction of the conversation, but what she was wearing or what her exact words were? No way.

On first glance I might seem like an ordinary girl. Not the skinniest, not the prettiest, not the smartest; overall pretty average. I might be all those things, but I also might be more. How can you make a good first impression if you are having a bad hair day or all your good clothes are in the wash? Will the person you are meeting forever think that your hair is a greasy and frizzy or that you match brown shirts with orange pants? And that does not mean that if I do match my favorite colors (black and black) together, that the other person will like it. They might hate it, but that is their decision. Nobody said my taste in clothes and color is the best. There is a difference between self-image and self-absorbance. I can think of myself as well-put-together, but that does not mean I think I am the most well-put-together person there is.

My best friend once told me, “The first time I met you, I thought you were a total bitch.”

It is true. I do come on a little strong at times, but it makes it easier for me to gain friends. I know it is not like that for everyone, for some people it takes time to feel comfortable with a person. For me, it is practically instant. I have a good conversation with someone and I feel like we are already friends.

In the modern teenage world there is this thing, this “belief,” that it is completely okay to be an asshole to your friend. Well, obviously, jokingly asshole-like. My best friend and I always call each other names, that might seem very offensive to a person looking at us from the side. People are always surprised as to how we say such terrible thing to each other and then laugh together at some joke a second later. But for us, it is okay. She calls me fat, I say her outfit looks hideous; that is how our friendship works.

I have that kind of relationship with most people, it is just how I am. I can sometimes be rude, but my friends understand that I am kidding and I cannot help the- at times- inapropriate behavior. However, to a person on the outside it might seem like I am a complete bitch. People have told me that I have a permanent “resting-bitch-face” and of course sarcasm is my first language. That does not exactly mean I am a rude person, or that I am mean… Personally, I think it means that I am just worse at masking my facial expressions and emotions than other people. While others keep their resting-bitch-face inside, mine just naturally comes out. I cannot help rolling my eyes, making comments while someone is talking, frowning at stupid things, etc. Ask any one of my friends and they will tell you that the first time they met me they thought I was crazy and/or a bitch. People learn to love me and my attitude. Or at least I hope they do. At least they keep talking to me even after years of knowing me.

I laugh a lot. At almost anything (my jokes or other peoples’ jokes). When somebody says potato it is an instant reflex for me to laugh (do not ask). It might seem weird for some people, ever for my friends, but I am going to laugh anyway. I mean, what is self-image if you do not even know who you are? If you try to be nice to everyone, eventually you will tire out and turn into a sad, sad person. You cannot always be peoples’ doormat, because you will be used ruthlessly. People are like that, they do not appreciate what is given to them for free, and niceness is one of those qualities that people take for granted. However once they are not granted this quality, they feel the need to complain and make your life miserable. So nice people turn into unhappy people. Does not mean you should not be nice though. It is just a theory.

Putting everything together; the bitchiness and the awkwardness and the weirdness… there is not much more to say than I feel like what I feel inside it what shows on my face. People can read my emotions at any time, because my facial expressions show it all. You make a joke, I make a face, that is how it goes.


© Copyright 2017 Katherine Wild. All rights reserved.

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