Big Daddy Cheerleader

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
A man does something funny but his wife and neighbor were not so amused.

Submitted: June 14, 2016

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Submitted: June 14, 2016

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Big Daddy Cheerleader

By Shadowgate

…...

It was 9PM and Amy Carbon was sitting in her living room with her friend Lucy Shire. Lucy spent the last month trying to get the local high school cheerleader uniforms replaced. She did and Amy had her over for ice cream that night.

At 9:15 PM Cory Carbon arrived home with his friend Mark Ballad. Both are 13 years old and Mark would be spending the night. Both of them wanted to avoid Lucy Shire.

At 9:30 PM Bill Carbon arrived home. When he got home he asked where Cory was. Amy told him Cory and his friend Mark were upstairs and Mark would be spending the night.

Bill noticed Lucy was over and he asked "well Lucy I've not seen you in a week. Were you busy getting more DJ's fired for cussing on the air?"

Lucy replied "hey if more of them cussing on the morning time radio I'll seek to have them terminated. So far it's just been one and you should be supporting me."

Amy said "oh honey in our room are three cheerleader uniforms that she got banned. New uniforms will be issued next week to the high school students."

Bill asked "what are the cheerleader uniforms doing in our bedroom?"

Amy answered "oh we're just keeping them there for the time being. Lucy had to have them earlier to make her case to the school district board to have them banned."

Bill commented "okay and now that she's banned the cheerleader uniforms maybe next week she can ban rock groups like the Beatles and the Rolling Stones."

Lucy said "it's too late for that they've been around for fifty years."

Bill was disgusted.

Amy said "Bill we're going to watch a movie called Little Women so let's put off all discussions for now."

At 11:30 PM when their movie was over they got up to stretch.

All of a sudden Bill came pouncing into the living room. He was wearing one of the cheerleader uniforms and he started screaming.

"I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING! I'M FED UP WITH CENSORSHIP AND I'M SICK OF PEOPLE WHINING ABOUT CHEERLEADER UNIFORMS WHEN KIDS ARE BRINGING GUNS TO SCHOOL!"

Amy asked "Bill what the fuck are you doing in that cheerleader uniform?"

Bill answered "I'M GOING TO SING AND JUMP!"

Bill started jumping up and down in the air.

Cory and Mark entered the living room and Cory asked "dad what the fuck are you doing in that cheerleader uniform?"

Bill (still jumping) yelled "I PUT THIS CHEERLEADER UNIFORM ON TO DRIVE LUCY AND YOUR MOTHER FUCKING CRAZY AND WATCH YOUR GODDAMN MOUTH YOU KNOW YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO SAY FUCK!"

Amy yelled "BILL CUT IT OUT THIS INSTANT!"

Bill yelled "NO I'M GOING TO SING YMCA!"

(Bill starts kicking high and goes on to sing."

"SNOOCKUMS"

"HE CALLED HIS BOYFRIEND SNOOKUMS! THEY LOVE TO GET GAY AT THE YMCA! THEY LOVE TO SUCK BIG DICKS AT THE YMCA! THEY LOVE TO FUCK EACH OTHER IN THE ASS AT THE YMCA! YMCA!"

Bill kicks a table and a lamp falls over and breaks.

Amy yelled "BILL YOU BROKE THAT LAMP!"

Bill keeps kicking and goes on to sing "YMCA! THEY LOVE TO BE QUEER AT THE YMCA! OH SHIT I BROKE A FUCKING LAMP AND GAYS LOVE TO SUCK BIG DICKS AT THE YMCA!"

Lucy said "I'm leaving."

Bill sang "EVERYBODY SING YMCA! THEY LOVE TO SUCK BIG DICKS AT THE YMCA!"

Mark and Cory laughed their asses off and Amy screamed so loud the whole neighborhood could hear her.

THE END

 

 


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