Happy Father's Day

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Review Chain
A family celebrates Father's Day, but things don't go as planned.

Submitted: June 19, 2016

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Submitted: June 19, 2016

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Once upon a time there was a nice family. The family consisted of a mother, a father, and a son. They were very happy until one day. 
The day was a day like this one. It was Father's Day. Of course the family had experienced many Father's Days in the past, but non like this one. No, this Father's Day was unlike any other Father's Day the family had gone through. 
The wind seem to blow harder this day, a sign of what was to come. The family didn't notice though, they were clueless to what the day would unfold. They just handled this Father's Day like it was any other Father's Day, because to the family it was. It wouldn't be for long though.
The son, Dies Noots and the mother, Anya Fase got up early and made the father a breakfast. They cooked his favorite meal. The meal included Italian sausages and a glass of milk.  They placed the sausages on a plate that displayed Ryan Goslings face on it, for the father enjoyed eating juicy Italian sausages off of Ryan's face. Anya Fase went to go wake up her husband, so he could devourer the sausages that lay upon Ryan Gosling's face.  
The father was still sleeping when Anya Fase came into their bedroom to wake him. She noticed the men's fitness magazine he had laying on the dresser and assumed he had been up late last night reading all about Mark Walberg's fitness tips. She shook her husband gently and he woke. 

"Hello Anya Fase." He said to his wife. 

"Hello my dear Gaylord, I see you have stayed up reading the men's fitness magazine again." She said. The father had spent many of nights reading the magazines, and looking at the models. Anya never understood her husband's interest in the magazines and why he insisted on reading them while she slept. 

"I have my dear, I am very sorry if that upsets you." Gaylord responded. 

"Oh no, of course not. Me and Dies Noots have prepared a splendid meal for you. Happy Father's Day." Anya Fase responded and kissed her beloved husband on the cheek, for she knew how uncomfortable he had been last time she bestowed her kiss on his lips.

"Thank you my lovey wife. I will be right down after I take my morning shower." Gaylord smiled. 

The mother smiled back at her husband. She quickly made her way down stairs, knowing how bothered her husband got when she stayed upstairs while he showered. She met with the son and they went over the usually activities they did on Father's Day, in case one of them had forgotten. They always ate the father's special breakfast, watched the father's favorite movie, and then talked about their feelings, which the father very much enjoyed to do. The father arrived to the kitchen not long after the mother and son had discussed the plans for the day. 
He happily ate his special meal and then they all sat on the sofa to watch Mean Girls. The mother sat on the left side of her son and the father sat on the right. The father got very squeamish if the mother sat next to him, so Anya Fase never did. The movie soon ended and they turned towards each other to explore their feelings together. Even though it was Father's Day, the father always let the mother and son go before him. The mother talked about her book club, which the father had started. She also discussed the relationship problems her book club buddy and good friend of the father, Dick Enyaas. Dick Enyaas had been struggling with his wife Willie Enyaas.  Dick's wife had found him at a bar, and she was very upset because she doesn't like when her husband went to the bar. She was always worried, because of how friendly the men were with her husband. The mother had shared her same concern. The mother had found the father had wondered into the bar as well once, but he stopped going when she expressed her worries. 
The son talked about his feeling after the mother had talked and the father had given her some advice. The son talked about how he went over to his friend Trixie's house and he got to see and explore her garage. The son had met Trixie outside Micky D's one night and they had enjoyed each others company ever since. The son liked to Netflix and chill with Trixie, but he always had to lend her money afterwords. 
After the son explained his play date with Trixie the father's turn came. The father was very hesitate on what to say this time. He  usually talked about the newest episode of Project Runway. Not today though. No, the father had something very serious to tell his wife and son. 

" Dies Noots, Anya Fase, I have something to tell you. You might be very upset at first, but I assure you I mean no harm by what I am about to tell you." The father recited like how he had practiced. 

The mother and the son listen in curiosity. The mother assumed he would say he didn't like the color of the house, even though he knew how much the mother had liked it. The son thought he would say that they were moving. Neither the mother nor the son were prepared for what the father was about to say. 

"I just wanted to let you two know..that I have a fondness in males. It doesn't mean I love you, Anya Fase, any less. I do love you, just not in a Romantic nor Sexual fashion. I, Gaylord Maine Hoomber, am gayer than a box of crayons." The father announced, leaving the mother and the son speechless. Never in a thousand year would either of them have ever thought that the father would utter those words. 

The family soon split up after that Father's Day. Dies Noots and Anya Fase stayed at the home, but Gaylord Main Hoomber moved to San Francisco. The family was never to be seen together or heard talking together ever again. 

Happy Father's Day. 


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