My Story

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: True Confessions  |  House: Booksie Classic

Submitted: July 15, 2016

A A A | A A A

Submitted: July 15, 2016



My story




All you could hear were my cries pleading for him to him stop “please stop I don’t want this anymore.”



6 years earlier


It all started like a normal day  just like it always had, dark, gloomy, and foggy, I mean but what else do you expect at 4am in the morning. “cece" my mom called "are you ready to go."

 “yes mommy, I am coming.” I hollered back. My brother and I had to get up early every weekday to go to my grandparents house because we live to far from our school, so we would walk from grandmas. My father a tall dark man with a funny moustache stood at the door and waited, I was daddy’s little girl. Beside him stood my mother a short yet average size woman waiting for a hug and a kiss goodbye, today dad was dropping us off. My brother and I got in the car and started fighting over the radio station like how we always would he was sitting in the front because he was older I was only In 6th grade him in 10th so he obviously chose the station. The ride wasn’t usually long, but today felt like a life time I knew he would be there, the monster who comes sleep with me and grandma. “cece were here dad said breaking through my thoughts.” I stepped out to feel the icy cold winter air touch my skin I never would bundle up I loved the cold December air. I went straight into the room when I got into the house and went to sleep the monster usually didn’t bother me if he knew I was really tired. I awoke 30 minutes later to the touch of someone’s hands wondering on my body,  “ no he was here.” I thought. I turned to see the dark shadowy figure looking straight at me bringing his head closer for a kiss. “NO STOP.” I pleaded but he wouldn’t listen his needs were too important. After 15 minutes of torture my grandma called the monster to go pray, I always thought it funny how he thought it was okay to touch little girls then go pray and act all innocent. “bloody bastard.” I murmured.


I got home from school exhausted, “ding” oh my gosh it was Brad he’s so cute he always played with my cheeks and cuddled with me cause he thought of me as a baby even though I was only 4 years younger then him. We were family friends he was my first love, but he’s to obsessed with michelle, Michelle this Michelle that ugh I wish she would just go to hell. Brad and I had a weird relationship we liked each other but it wasn’t the right time, plus my mom hated him after she found out I started to like him. We started talking he asked me what’s up I told him bout my day then went to bed. The next three months later of the same shitty morning amazing afternoons. I finally broke down I needed someone to tell about the monster, so I told Brad I told him how the monster sleeps with my grandma and I and I told him who it was and what he does, he was shocked. But I felt great finally I had someone to talk to, about this a few weeks later he came over with his family we cuddled and then played video games with my brother.

In april I finally got the nerves to tell my mom about the monster it was her dad after all she had every right to know. “mom can I talk to you its important its about grandpa”

She looked at me “yeah of course what is it”

I started crying “he, he’s been touching me and doing wrong things when we go there in the morning for school and even before that since I was three.” Now she looked at me with anger. “how can you accuse my father of such things he’s an old innocent, religious man.” Screamed my mom, then walked out. I fell to the floor crying the one person who’s supposed be there for me and protect me left me hanging.


A year went by a year full of torture by the monster because of my mom and Brad had a girlfriend who I hated but I also had a boyfriend, brad was and always will me my first love. Brad and his family and my family and I had just came back from the Caribbean’s. the worst place to get in a fight with Brad but obviously that’s what happened. He started to like me a lot so he said he cant talk to me cause I have a boyfriend and he has a girlfriend. April 15 we stopped talking I started starving my self and cutting myself its not because I was a little girl who was obsessed with him its because he’s all I had when the monster would strike, my friend Bella told the principal what I was doing, I don’t blame her I would do the same thing. I couldn’t say it was over a guy so I finally opened up I told the truth about my grandpa, the police shortly showed up asked me questions. Then the hard part facing the family, mom, dad, aunt, and uncle. I remember it like it was yesterday I walked up to my dad and he looked me dead in the eyes and said “stop with your lies.” I never felt so hurt or betrayed. I couldn’t go home the night because my parents have history of physical abuse so I was scared they might do something to me. My aunt and her two kids went to a hotel and stayed there for a night ill never forget the 2 minute talk she gave me “maybe your wrong cece maybehe was just trying to comfort you.” How is it comforting with a man who’s like 60 years older then you who has their hands down your pants.

The next morning was a big day for me I had to go to the police station and make a statement. I was super nervous they asked me a whole bunch of questions. When I was done they said they would like to see me tomorrow for more questions. My mom and my aunt were waiting for me, we finally got home and that’s when it started, my aunt and my mom started making me feel guilty about what I was doing, how he’s so old and weak and what would happen if he went to jail and what about grandma she would for sure have a heart attack. I felt like I had no choice they told me to lie to the police that I made the whole thing up, so that’s what I did. The next day at the police station I lied through my teeth said everything was a lie I wanted attention. The constable a woman gave me her card and said if anyone is forcing you to say this call me, but how could I mom took it away and plus I was worried about grandma. One good thing that turned up from that event was that I never had to sleep there again.



3 years went by I was in 10th grade, I wasn’t what you would call a good model child, I was running away from home, drinking, smoking weed. Always fighting which was funny for my height since I am only 5’2 wit long black hair and chubby cheeks. One day I ran away from school with my ex boyfriend I hid in a hotel until the police and family found me, there was no way I was going home with these loser I had a hate for them, I got in the cop car and the officer said “ time to go home missy.” I said “no.” I don’t feel safe going home with my parents their abusive which they were at the time, so he called my best friend’s mom and I was going stay there, the ride was going to be long so he was talking bout my closed file with my grandpa I couldn’t take it now was my chance I could tell them the truth and say how my family made me lie, I told him he calmed me down, gave me the file number and said whenever I am ready I can open it again.

I got to my best friends house Taylor we’ve been friends for 9 years she’s like my little sister. She told how she went out looking for me how she messaged all these people including Brad!!! “he was worried about you and said to call as soon as we here anything about you.” She said. Of course he was we had started talking again and he was finally over all those bimbos.
I stayed at Taylor house for 11 days, after I went home I got a social worker and a counsellor. Things were looking better at home no more hitting everything was going my way, I became the diva of the house at 15 I was still running away late at night and going out with random men it was bad.


 Until June 9th Brads birthday I had messaged him like I do every year at 12 am, after that we started talking for a month of flirty and cute talking and then we were back to liking each other nut this time mom new and she really started liking him so did dad we went camping together and that’s when I started to change I went from pink hair back to black I went from piercings back to none and running away never again. So far, Taylor and I have stopped talking due to an unfortunate event where I tried to kill myself because I just started taking anti depressants, I would always cut and try and kill my self since 10 grade because of the flash backs of the monster. September 1st Brad and I started dating, he’s always at my house I love it, who would have ever thought I would be with my first love and crush. Nov 9th my birthday I had an amazing day with Brad and my friend Jocelyn and also my brother, we went to Grandville island we went to two restaurants, though we only ate at one, but it was the best day. The flashbacks come and go but talking to Brad helps a lot. Few months later I went to my grandpas house to go get something he was sitting down reading the holy book when he saw me he looked up and said “you deceived me when will you come to the room again” I looked at him with disgust as I walked past him he tried to grab me I ran upstairs.


Today I was sitting in my room brushing my short black hair looking at my reflection feeling so lost, when all of a sudden I felt calloused fingers run down my body I looked in the reflection of my mirror there he was standing right behind me the monster “not again.” I quickly stood up and ran out the door to the hallway but he was right there I ran to my moms room and shut the door behind me. “damn it to hell he was here to” I gave up “how long can I run” I thought I surrendered to the monster his hands when down my neck the, lower it went, the more I pleaded for him to stop “please stop I don't want this anymore.” I started clawing at my chest until the crimson waters of my body started to escape me, with one last scream he was gone everything was gone. No one was here it was nothing more then one of my flashbacks that I’ve been having for the past 13 years.


© Copyright 2018 Asifa Shah. All rights reserved.

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