As Are You

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Flash Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic
A very short story about a confused man and a few talking animals that shouldn't be talking. --- What is going on?

Submitted: August 01, 2016

A A A | A A A

Submitted: August 01, 2016



There was this man, his name was Woody, and of course he lived in the woods after he retired.

Woody made his living as a carpenter for years and to retire in Woody had built himself a log cabin; complete with hand built furnishings.

At the front door of the cabin was a deck-like porch, complete with waist-high railings. On the porch were two well crafted wooden chairs, one on each side of the door.

Sometimes Woody would sit in the chair on the right, sometimes he would sit on the one on the left, and it all depended on which perspective that he wished to view.

From one chair he could see through a gap in the tree-line, the view from there was of a beautiful blue lake.

From the other chair he could see both a snow capped mountain and the family of squirrels that had made their home in a pine-tree; they were always amusing to watch.

One morning, Woody got up later than usual and decided to have a cup of coffee while sitting in the Lake Chair. Suddenly a Crow abruptly landed on his porch railing and started cawing.

Woody looked at the bird and without thinking about it he said, "Well, good morning to you Mrs. Crow. Isn't it a beautiful day?"

The Crow cocked its head slightly sideways, still looking at Woody, and replied, "How did you know that I am a Mrs. and not a Mister?"

Well Woody was so shocked that he almost dropped his coffee cup!

"You talk?" Woody questioned.

"Only if I have something worthwhile to say, or a question that needs answering," replied Mrs. Crow, "which leads me back to my question, ("How did you know that I am a Mrs. and not a Mister?"). Most people can't tell without getting all touchy, feel-ie."

"Oh, it was just a guess. You seemed very persistent in the tone of your caw, rather motherly and bossy," Woody said as he chuckled.

"Hmm, interesting," remarked Mrs. Crow, then she stated, "I'll take that as a compliment."

"As it was intended, dear lady, as it was intended," Woody replied while sporting a smile.

Then Woody got an odd look on his face and asked, "was there something that you wanted when you landed on my rail?"

"Why yes there was, thanks for reminding me.

I see you, often, with that cup in your hand and I have wondered what it contains. I'm wondering if I might have a taste to see if I like it too?" Mrs. Crow questioned.

Woody replied, "Well it is called Coffee and I heat it over a fire, so it is quite often hot when I drink it. But it has cooled down quite a bit now so I see no harm in giving you a taste; but I doubt that you will like it. --- Here, give it a try."

Mrs. Crow dipped her beak in the cup and, "Cough, spit, spit, cough, cough, Oh that is awful," she exclaimed!

"True," said Woody, "it is an acquired taste so you have to drink a little at a time until you grow fond of it."

"Well thanks but no thanks! (Cough) I think that I'll stick to water for now, but it was nice of you to let me try it."

"No problem," Woody noted, "you have probably made the wisest choice."

"Bye for now," Mrs. Crow said, and then flew away.


Woody ate breakfast and then washed his breakfast dishes in the cabin. Afterward he went outside to cut some firewood for the cabin.

While taking sections of log from the wood pile to chop, Woody noticed a Skunk had made itself a place to sleep underneath the wood.

"Oh Great," Woody exclaimed, "A skunk in the wood pile!"

"Is that supposed to be a derogatory remark?" The skunk questioned.

"You talk too?" Woody asked in astonishment.

"Well sure I talk, I'm surprised that you don't know that," the skunk remarked as it made a giggling sound.

After a brief stretch the skunk walked off in the direction of some boulders, possibly to find a quieter place to sleep.

At about the same time a cougar wandered through a stand of trees.

Seeing the cougar, Woody grabbed his ax from the wood pile and turned towards the cougar.

"What are you going to do with that?" the cougar questioned.

"I'm defending myself," Woody nervously exclaimed.

The big cat began to chuckle and said, "You really need orientation." Then the cat left the area.

Woody sat down on the wood pile with his head in his hands, and just sat there.

Suddenly a voice was heard and it was very near Woody, "Are you all right dear?"

Woody knew that voice; it was his dear sweet mother.

"Mom," Woody whispered in disbelief, "how can this be? You are dead.

"As are you, son, as are you."



D. Thurmond / JEF  ---  08-01-2016

© Copyright 2018 D. Thurmond, aka, JEF. All rights reserved.

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