I Have a Problem

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
"I Have a Problem" is a story about my mind's process into identifying myself as a slut after my sexual endeavors my senior year of high school.

Submitted: August 04, 2016

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Submitted: August 04, 2016



I am a slut. It is not like the average individual's thirst for sex. I crave it. I cannot concieve living without it. I may not sleep with many people, but boy, do I think about it. I was afraid of dying a virgin when I was 14-years-old. Now, I don't have to, but I do not know if I will ever get to experience the pleasure again, whether with a girl or a boy. I could die before my boyfriend returns from the military. But hopefully we break up so I don't have to wait that long. It has been almost three months. Admittedly, he wasn't the best, but it was something.

I crave to sleep with my ex-girlfriend. She loves it, and her body is my sanctuary. My family doesn't know how much she still floods my mind with these erotic images of her body squirming under my touch. Hell, she doesn't know I can't go two days without masturbating.

I think I have a problem. It's been going on since I was eight-years-old. It feltgood, why shouldn't I do it? That was a question my mom never answered. That girl on the video is touching herself, why can't I, too? Another question she avoided by grounding me. She told me watching this was wrong, but she could never tell me why. I kept doing it. Soon, it became a release, something I would do at the end of the day out of habit. Porn was a way out.

Then there was texting, or rather, sexting. The act of sending racy photos of oneself or naughty fantasies through detailed description. I felt dirty doing these things, but I knew what I was getting myself into if I got pictures back...

Yeah, yeah, child pornography, but no one really thinks of that. Especially not an addict.

Then I turned 18, and he was 18. This was foolproof. He was hot and funny and totally fuckable. I didn't go a day without wishing it could be.

I have a problem.

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