A Heart In The Corner

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
taken from my book, "I Gotta Find My Mind"

Submitted: August 05, 2016

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Submitted: August 05, 2016

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A Heart In The Corner

-

Now I know why my love-life

__is the way it is

I'm so afraid of what happened to me

__and liz 1

____happening with me and another woman

______that I shy away

________from going up to any one

Can I ever take a risk

__and just take a chance again?

It's been 18 & 2/3 years

__since my last issue with her

Haven't I changed enough?

Is it meshed into who I am?

To be too shy

__to go after who I like?

She's caused me a great amount

__of pain

But that was 18 & 2/3 years ago

How can I make the same mistake?

I'm over that woman

But I'm not over Wendy

I'm not even over Kenya

Nor Liz 7

__for that matter

I just don't know how to go after

__any one these days

It's like I'm paralyzed

__when it comes to women

If only I never let the past

__get to me

____I would have learned

______to approach the ones I wanted

________and be able to have

__________nothing to fear

____________about love

But I don't have thee experience

And I'm too old

__to be taught any new tricks

I'm just gonna die alone

Because it's too late for me

__to grow up

____and be some one

______that women can love

So this is thee end of my hope

I'll just stay a lost cause

Helpless and pathetic

And just plain shoved in a drawer

__by ev'ry one

____and put away

Why even wait for love?

She'll never come

She just won't come

This just makes me wanna

__kill ev'ry one

But there's nobody to kill

It would be nice

__to just watch some one

____getting killed

But I can't even be that lucky

What a pointless way of living

I wish I could find my justice

To make up for all this shit

But all I get

__is rejection

____and being passed up

I've missed out

__on a life of loving

____like ev'ry one else has had

And now I'm just too used to

__having no one to love and screw

Things can't change

At least not that much

I am not capable of being loved first

But sex and love

__are not my only thirsts

They're just the strongests

But the world is just

__to fucked up of a place

____to do anything about it

______for me

________like they do for ev'ry one else

So this is all there is to living

Having a desire that burns

__on fire

Melting my heart into anger

As the rage builds up inside me

Every woman is running from me

Everywhere I go

It's the same old story

That never gets old

-

08-04-'16

D. L. Cannon


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