I am Trans

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic
Note: I wrote this due to an interest in non-binary sexuality and is not autobiographical. It is an imagining of the mine of a transexual who isn't publicly trans to their family.

Submitted: August 30, 2016

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Submitted: August 30, 2016

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I awoke to find myself the same. Day after day, the wheels of life spin on. I stare at the mirror and hate myself but I think I know why. The shower glass reflects me in a different light and I wonder who I am. I grab my genitals and tuck them in between my legs. I imagine if I was born a different, life would be better. I rub myself and I grow hard. I grab myself and want it gone but it will stay.

The Friday night I sat at home and soon enough the girl walked in. I strip down nude in my room and slip on special underwear, one that makes it look smooth but I know it isn’t. I place a corset round my belly and do up the buttons and laces. I stroke my hips and my crotch but it is fake. Breast forms and bras that look real but it is all fake.

I wax my face, my arms, and my legs. I put on a skirt and high heels and a long sleeve jumper. Tights under so it is harder to see.

The girl applies make up, I look different but it is fake. A ginger wig that look real and I want it to be. I practise my voice but it is the voice of the person I want to be, the fake voice is my real one.

We go to the club and though they know no different, I feel their stares like a thousand knives. I hide in the disabled toilets and it is a lie to go in either. I beg the doctors for the pill to make the way I want. Instead they tell me to live like one first.

My family make me feel like their love is there if I stay ‘just the way I am.’ My friend joke and make me feel like I would never be with them if I was different.

I am alone. I am scared.

I am Trans.


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