Song: Total Inaffection

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic
A song about a crush, back from when I was in a pretty bad place emotionally. Name changed for anonymity.

Submitted: October 08, 2016

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Submitted: October 08, 2016



Every time I look at you, he’s here:

The monster’s voice of sickness, doubt and fear

Hammering my consciousness of slate

Which at first glance would look as if it were a sturdy plate


But if struck, would shatter

Into a thousand, thousand shards

And breaking me? Well, that wouldn’t be

Quite as hard as I’d have you believe.


But you? You’re stunning; beautiful, so pretty

That if I think about it, it’s quite fitting

Considering that I never stood a chance

At your love (at your love, my dear)


And now here comes the gallant knight

Whisking you away into the night

And there’s nothing I can do but watch in misery –

O! My hidden agony.


Don’t worry about me, my friend, I never was important

I hope he makes you happier than I ever dreamed;

It’s hard to live up to, for in my fantasies

We’d live our lives the happiest that we could ever be


Remember the day we walked in those fields?

The day we picked the bittersweet lilies

That grew down in the valley – you don’t remember?

No – I don’t suppose either of us would


I never was the one to ask or pray

For guidance or your loving hand

It’s one of my primest regrets, I say

Laying on the fine crystals of sand.


I’m wasting borrowed time, I know

I was the one borrowing from you

I hope someday you’ll hear this song

And you can grasp at the desperate truth


Goodbye, farewell, my dear, my love

Endearments I never used in real life

I’d be better off calling you be name

As you’d never answer to these terms from me.


I’m still clinging on, by fingernails

Help me over the edge

I can no longer dwell upon you

The monster’s begun to thrive


He’s feeding on my heartbreak

At your unbeknownst rejection.

At your perfect reddish-brown locks

And total Inaffection.


One more tender farewell now

And an imagined loving kiss.

Sorry I never asked you, Katie,

I wish you all the best.

© Copyright 2017 Joshua Foakes. All rights reserved.

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