Head in the Toilet

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Oh So Funny
Ever been locked in a toilet, i have. Here's my experience with it...

Submitted: October 12, 2016

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Submitted: October 12, 2016

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Head in the Toilet

 

Sunday, My mums at work, brothers out and I am in my room playing a game about making a fake theme park, with little fake people riding totally unrealistic rollercoasters. I enjoyed the game; I mean it is the closest you will get to riding rollercoasters from the comfort of your own bedroom. I love going to theme parks, I wouldn't consider myself an adrenalin junky, because I didn't really go to the parks to ride the rides so much as look at the mechanics and being in an immersive world that someone has dreamt up, just like I dream up theme parks in video games.

Now I was in the middle of renovating the park, when nature calls. I need to go to the toilet, just like every other human being needs to go to toilet. So I pause my game and I get up out of the comfort of my office chair and walk to the toilet. We had just got the bathroom done up, it looked really good but now looking back on the decision  to get it renovated and the bath removed seemed a bit stupid, because now I can no longer buy bath bombs or fancy foaming soaps. So I proceed to do my business and then flush the toilet because I am not one of those people who DO NOT flush the toilets after they have done either a No.1 or No.2. Following flushing I get up and check my hair in the mirror, and I say to myself ‘wow, my hair looks great, TYPICAL.’ So I have done everything I needed to do and I go to open the door…

Stuck, the door is stuck. What the frick, HOW is the door stuck; there wasn't even a lock on the door because someone had previously got stuck in the bathroom. I continued to get the door open but, it wouldn't. I stood there for let’s say, five minutes, no idea why because unless I am magic and can somehow telepathically open the door then I am literally not going to get out. So after my five minutes of nothingness I call to my dad trying to inform him that I am in fact, stuck in a toilet. But, of course, my dad is lying on the couch, as usual, watching the football. After a couple more calls with breaks in between, trying to telepathically open the door, I hear the living room door open and my dad start to stomp up the stairs and when he reaches the top I say, ‘ um dad, yeah, I’m kind of stuck in the toilet’. ‘WHAT!’ he proceeded to yell. And as soon as he said that, I just knew that things were about to kick off.

Following the shouting and continuous attempts to try and barge the door open, my dad came up with the absolutely great idea to get a brush and sellotape a star head screw driver to the brush and shove it through the gap in the window. But that plan failed because we did not own a two story high brush. So after the failure of his first ingenious idea we both agreed the only option left was to break the glass at the top of the broken bathroom door. Now, if you’ve ever watched The Shining, the one with the iconic ‘Here’s Jonny’ scene, you know how the next five minutes went.  So, the glass is broke, shattered bits across the bathroom floor may I add, and my dad passes the screw driver through the newly made whole at the top of the bathroom door, and I start to unscrew the handle on the door. The handle comes of and there it was, the wonderful mechanics of the inside of a door handle, well a broken one. I crack the piston open on the door and boom, I’m out.

So with that I go back to my room and continue to play the game in which I make a fake theme park, with little fake people and ride fake rollercoasters.Head in the Toilet

 


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